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A Message from Michele
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Re: Jack 3 Beans [Re: job] #2712625
10/27/16 07:24 AM
10/27/16 07:24 AM
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 6,810
Florida
S
Starsky309 Offline
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Starsky309  Offline
Member
S
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 6,810
Florida
I was so sad to hear this news this morning, really shook me up and I'm still reeling. I never post here anymore, but along with Coach and maybe one or two others, Jack was a giant here to whom I really looked up.

He's on the "Mount Rushmore of DB," surely.

And yet those last two items of praise would have really, REALLY made him uncomfortable . . . pissed him off actually.

Which is why he was a giant. smirk

Rest in peace, my friend. I learned so much from you, especially about how to help people and keeping that as my focus and tuning out all of the other noise and bullchit (which was often legion back then). I have so much respect for your commitment to that, and the way you lived out the "pay it forward" mantra that so many others SAY, but never really DO.

May God richly reward you for the lives you touched, including those you may not have ever even known. My faith tells me that now He is in fact showing you that, sorta like that guardian angel showed Jimmy Stewart in "It's a Wonderful Life" what the town would have been like without George Bailey.

Strength and honor, and to you a much-deserved:

whistle whistle whistle whistle

Chocolateeyes/Puppy Dog Tails/Starsky


M57 W 57; D30 D28 S24 S20 GD7 GD2 GD1 GD5m GD1m
BD 5/07; W's affair 5/07-8/07

At the end of every hard-earned day, people gotta find some reason to believe. (Bruce Springsteen)
Re: Jack 3 Beans [Re: Starsky309] #2712628
10/27/16 07:39 AM
10/27/16 07:39 AM
Joined: Oct 2006
Posts: 10,147
Memphis, TN
S
sofaraway Offline
Member
sofaraway  Offline
Member
S
Joined: Oct 2006
Posts: 10,147
Memphis, TN
Shortly after my separation I found myself laying on my living room floor in the fetal position wondering why I should continue on. My phone rang and it was Jack 3 beans, the good old days when we could contact one another circa 2007. Jack spent 2 hours talking to me, listening to me ball and giving me direction on how to get my act together. Him and I bonded that night which many old timers will tell you was the most illogical pairing in the world. He and I bantered lovingly back and forth on these boards and he continued to be a guide throughout my journey.

While I like to think I am a strong enough person to have made it through that night without him, I feel that I owe him a debt of gratitude that makes this day even more difficult because i do not know that I ever thanked him properly for what he did for me. Jack was compassionate and understanding and even as he struggled in his own marriage and trying to save it (which he was fairly successful at) he never once didn't make an effort to actively be a leader on these boards.

RIP pirate, it saddens me that the people on this board now will not have the pleasure of reading your tales and passionate stories. You will be missed more than you know.

Strength and Honor my friend,

Ian (Sofaraway)


M- 48
XW- mentally 17
KIDS- 3- S19, D23, D28
Married- 17 years
Divorce final- 10/16/09

Re: Jack 3 Beans [Re: Starsky309] #2712633
10/27/16 08:02 AM
10/27/16 08:02 AM
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 601
UK
D
Delboy Offline
Member
Delboy  Offline
Member
D
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 601
UK
R I P my friend. May God continue to comfort and bless your family.

Love

Delboy.

P.S What I once wrote about you.

Jack be nimble
Jack be quick
Jack jumped over a candle stick
Silly boy should have jumped higher
Goodness gracious great balls of fire.

Re: Jack 3 Beans [Re: sofaraway] #2712634
10/27/16 08:03 AM
10/27/16 08:03 AM
Joined: Jul 2008
Posts: 990
Central NJ
K
KenF Offline
Member
KenF  Offline
Member
K
Joined: Jul 2008
Posts: 990
Central NJ
Such sad news. Jack 3 beans was one the many great posters that helped me out when i needed it the most. and was not afraid to give the tough advice which i needed the most.

To give like he did takes a lot of strength and love.

my thoughts go out to his family, and friends, and all many many people he helped.


"In a ham and eggs breakfast, the hen is involved, but the pig is committed".
Re: Jack 3 Beans [Re: sofaraway] #2712636
10/27/16 08:05 AM
10/27/16 08:05 AM
Joined: May 2008
Posts: 1,470
M
mulesqb Offline
Member
mulesqb  Offline
Member
M
Joined: May 2008
Posts: 1,470
Most of my interactions with Jack were on FB Messenger and not on the boards. He reached out to me personally on a number of occasions for some real heart to heart stuff. Things which I still think about to this day. One in particular was about staying true to myself through the toughest of times. Eternally grateful for that.

Tragic news. So sorry for his family and close friends.

Agree with Starsky. DB Mt Rushmore worthy. We lost a giant.

Strength and Honor.

Mules


M 43
W 44
M 17
T 22
S16,12,9
Bomb 2/05/08
I served her 1/06/09
S'd 3/15/09
D'd 12/21/09



"Tough times don't last, tough people do." --My Dad to me years ago, me to my boys now.
Re: Jack 3 Beans [Re: AndrewP] #2712644
10/27/16 08:21 AM
10/27/16 08:21 AM
Joined: Jul 2010
Posts: 346
T
TAMF Offline
Member
TAMF  Offline
Member
T
Joined: Jul 2010
Posts: 346
Just got the message that Jeff "Jack" died today. Such sad news. I didn't know him personally like some of you did, but I felt like I did. Jeff was like the old vet who gave it to you straight - no BS. It wasn't always easy to hear, but it was always the truth and it was always helpful.

He used to always say, "You will get through this. You will survive. Quite possibly you will become a better person for this. A better parent, and have better skills in relationships."

At the time you read it, you don't believe him. But years later, I look back and every single word is true.

Thank you, Jeff, for all that you did to help me with my life crisis - you will never be forgotten. I will cherish your wisdom forever. Rest in Peace my friend.


TAMF
m:41
xh:41
T: 20
M: 15
D: 16
D: 14
Bomb dropped: 7/3/10
separated: 7/15/10
H moved in to new apt. with OW: 7/1/11
divorced: 8/26/12
Re: Jack 3 Beans [Re: mulesqb] #2712651
10/27/16 08:53 AM
10/27/16 08:53 AM
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 10,805
sgctxok Offline
Member
sgctxok  Offline
Member
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 10,805
I will post more later, I'm still absorbing the news. I think the world of JTB, and I'm angry he got such a crappy deal from life in the last few years.

After everything he still gave so much to his friends and family, and loved them tremendously.

Like you, he was there for me when I was down. On my worst day ever, he Was the one who checked in on me.


sg
Love is PATIENT, love is KIND, LOVE never fails / DB since 2001
Re: Jack 3 Beans [Re: TAMF] #2712653
10/27/16 08:57 AM
10/27/16 08:57 AM
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 4,260
M
Mach1 Offline
Member
Mach1  Offline
Member
M
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 4,260
I once wished Jack a Happy Birthday...

His response was that it wasn't Jack's birthday, it was Jack's drivers birthday, but he would tell him for me....

As someone posted above, Jack would have hated these posts about him, Jeff, even more so...

Jeff told me that Jack was the man that he aspired to be. I think that many aspired to be like Jack. I would argue, however, that Jeff was more than what Jack was. Jack was only a part of the man that Jeff was in life.

Much like Ian, Jeff saved me in more ways than I can repay.

I am at a loss for words today. Many of you will find that odd, especially from me...

Wherever you are, I doubt that you will ever read this, and IF you are and do, I hope that you realize the impact that you have had on so many lives, and the people that you have touched..

Jack's words are in these threads, scattered among years of taking in and giving back to anonymous faces. Once, I was among them.

His words will live here for years to come. I see them through the people that he has touched.


I love you my brother, and I cherish the memories that we have had...(and that is not how you know)...

Always worth the drive...



Jeff knew that I hated Thursdays, always have...

This Thursday hurts...

Re: Jack 3 Beans [Re: mulesqb] #2712654
10/27/16 09:01 AM
10/27/16 09:01 AM
Joined: Jan 1999
Posts: 3,315
Boulder, Colorado USA
Michele Offline
Member
Michele  Offline
Member
Joined: Jan 1999
Posts: 3,315
Boulder, Colorado USA
I received the very sad news today about Jack 3 Beans. When I read all the emails about what he meant to you, it's clear to me that he was truly a hero. He touched so many lives. I am really grateful to him for the love that he shared in this community. Thanks for sharing your thoughts, prayers and good wishes. I hope his family knows how much he meant to all of you. Thank you, Jack/Jeff. May you rest in peace.

Michele Weiner-Davis


The Divorce Buster
Re: Jack 3 Beans [Re: TAMF] #2712656
10/27/16 09:07 AM
10/27/16 09:07 AM
Joined: Oct 2016
Posts: 1
P
Pamela3 Offline
New Member
Pamela3  Offline
New Member
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Joined: Oct 2016
Posts: 1
I was here a very long time ago, and thank God I cannot remember my username because I do not want to see who I was back then.
Over time I became acquainted with Jeff. Eventually we became email and phone buddies and have stayed in touch all these years. He was always there to listen and to give guidance. I knew I could count on him, and I am sure he knew the same about me.

Right now I have comfort in the fact that one day I told him that I loved him (platonically of course!) and he said he loved me too. After that it became a common way to end our correspondence. I am glad he knew.

He recently told me that it was on his bucket list to come meet me. I am not wrapping my head around the fact that this cannot happen.

Thanks, Jeff, for everything. You helped me through a very difficult time in my life. I am glad you were able to get to know the happy and confident girl that had disappeared for so long. You and some other friends from here got me to this place and I am forever grateful.

I love you, my friend.

Pamela

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