Went out today to the best gossip place ever. While there ran into rhc (while the gossips says he's dating my observation is he's chatting up unavailable women) sad to see but he's getting out and I'm really pleased how much progress he's made.
Stalker dude was there and gave me a wide birth with bf, but later could hardly help himself. Xh2 second bestie he refused to even say hello, but later just kept giving me odd looks. The gossip tree will be in flames and tatters.
Oh and a couple of xh2 relatives well they were positively friendly and acted as of nothing had changed. So set the world alight people and you never know what's out there just waiting for you.
M 46 h54 Both married before T 11y Bd 2/14 I must see where ow leads! Ms 18 hs 26
Gossipy neighbours encouraged by bf house mate rolls eyes. Was seen eating out. the shock horror it was a Sunday tradition but we went out sat, seems a different crowd saw us.
Seems that means your about the announce an engagement or you already have! It's soooooooo very wrong on many levels.
xh2 has done some crazed stuff and has just helped out my evidence by his stupidity. He refuses the idea of settlement and I think court might be the option. Which means gg might do very nicely, much better than I wanted to at the start.
Last edited by Ggrass; 08/03/1508:24 AM.
M 46 h54 Both married before T 11y Bd 2/14 I must see where ow leads! Ms 18 hs 26
Real question for you - your new BF - it seems like it was almost accidental but moved fast. They say that can be a flag, did you ever feel love bombed there or like your time with him was pressed early?
Do you have any misgivings in your gut about if he is safe or not?
I ask, as I consider my future, and dating, wondering what it is like to date after a real rollercoaster, how easy is it to trust again. And somewhat concerned for you, possibly needlessly.
Mid 30's Psych-abusive M with violent tantrums from XH D 9/15; NC forever on
Sorry kiddos, been busy sick and just plain tired.
It's winter here as some of you guys know and boy last year I only had the sniffles this year, I've been coughing and coughing it's terrible.
Yes Zelda it's quick, but bf lost his wife under very tragic circumstances and was a that point where he had been pusing to move forward. Moved States moved complete across the county. I was pushing to just go anywhere. Didn't particularly care just so long as things are better.
On the plus side he's wanting to meet you half way In lots of stuff. The job thing or lack of has started to resolve. As of yesterday he's been given an opportunity that might lead to regular work. He's stepping up as has been from the get go on stuff that is blokey round the house. Not to proud to cook or clean or take on menial work..
It's hard to explain the difference in personality from either xh. Neither was gentle and seems to resort to thumping (animals in both and humans as well with xh2) or yelling. Not so here. Generous and happy to share his $ or pay his share, which xh2 did but was unhappy about and resentful and let you know. There's a dynamic of taking up each other's interests, with 0 resentment showing at this stage. We are both learning snowboarding which is very weird. He can laugh at him self and with you in a way that's not threatening.
All of that's more just feeling rather than any great action, more a lack of reaction and resentment. Let's hope this can covert over to something long term. Be is making plans to bring his family for a visit.
M 46 h54 Both married before T 11y Bd 2/14 I must see where ow leads! Ms 18 hs 26
I'm suffering some paranoid stuff, I'm thinking the worst of what ifs!
Those of you that have Been cheated on know what I mean, what if he's just acting but still looking and cheating....
What if what if what if.... And really I've not been given any reason that I can see to even think what if. I've just got that whole lizard out of the control breathe holding fear based reaction.
I'm trying to take risks, while being cautious but that big attraction isn't helping any rational stuff too much. On paper given I don't have a lot but could loose it all to him if things went south it's a huge gamble.
M 46 h54 Both married before T 11y Bd 2/14 I must see where ow leads! Ms 18 hs 26
And so we get back to its crazed stupid not logical match and what if it's just an act.
That act xh2 said he played for all those years putting up with my stupidity. I keep falling off the diet wagon of late too
There's a new lamb, wonky lambie made it thru the winter and is looking like making one year old. There are horsey babies due by the looks and that's exciting. S17 has been scarce since the wood incident.
His dawg has been yodelling and marking the couch so he now sporting a belly band in the.house so he can't mark the furniture anymore. On that the boundary line is drawn.
It's just tough working out what's gunna happen long term to get out of th half limbo state and working out if my paranoida is justified or not. I'm taking the whole one day at a time and the truth will come out in time on my paranoia.
M 46 h54 Both married before T 11y Bd 2/14 I must see where ow leads! Ms 18 hs 26
Hi GG, I think the answer is to take things at your own pace. When we are in the infatuation phase of falling in love isn't the time to make big decisions about whether we want to be with someone. It is best to let that love mature and settle first.
Also, I think it is important to look after yourself, your own interests and assets first - so that you don't even have the fear of losing them to someone else. I'm not sure that I would enter wholesale into M now and risk losing assets to someone else, particularly if they have few assets and I have many. But maybe I'm still a little raw.
In your sitch, I think it is worth thinking about. And the job sitch is a concern perhaps? Maybe wait and see how things settle on that front? Has your BF actually moved in now? Good to hear that winter is drawing to a close and spring is on the way for you guys!!
Take care, Sotto xx
T 13 M 7 Me 48 H 46 SS 15 BD 7.14 PA D final 5.16 (H filed)
We receive & we lose, and must try to achieve gratitude & embrace with whole hearts whatever of life that remains after the losses - Dubus
the shock horror 
it was a Sunday tradition but we went out sat, seems a different crowd saw us.