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Thanks for the insight Complex. A blessing of separation is she is now out of sight, out of mind. When she was living in our house and coming home at 4 or 5am many nights, it affected me and I would lose sleep. My quality of life has gone up and I can focus on myself even more now.


UpperCut
Me: 28 W: 25
Married: 4 yrs Together: 7 yrs
Dday: 9/14 (W ends affair & comes home)
S: 12/14 (W restarted affair 1/15; moved near OM 2/15)
No kids
Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 177
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W has been out of town for a month and returns this weekend. We hadn't talked in a couple weeks until yesterday when I sent her a text saying I hoped she was doing alright and that the insurance company would be calling to confirm she was being removed from our policies. She wished me well and said she would need to stop by to pick some things up when she gets back into town.

I've been on somewhat of a project binge getting things done over the holidays. House has been getting some much needed updates and maintenance. I also traded in her car and got myself a new truck this week; I had agreed to sell my old truck as part of our separation agreement and take on her car payment since she couldn't afford it.

I asked a friend who saw W over the holidays how she seemed. He said "honestly, I don't know because she was at the bars and out eating or shopping with my W the whole time. My W has been racking up cc debt left and right hanging out with your W. I really can't afford all that right now."

Wow, sounds like my W is really bringing others down at this point. Sad.

Been feeling down about W's lack of progress, but I feel like I'm learning, gradually, to let go of the outcome in all this. The sharp pain of loss of my best friend is kicking in now, as the hurt of the affair feels more like a dull pain now.

Played ball with the church team tonight and starting out as a leader in a new college group at church tomorrow. Next week is set to be pretty busy. I've started to make some travel plans for the next few months with friends and family also.


UpperCut
Me: 28 W: 25
Married: 4 yrs Together: 7 yrs
Dday: 9/14 (W ends affair & comes home)
S: 12/14 (W restarted affair 1/15; moved near OM 2/15)
No kids
Joined: Sep 2014
Posts: 1,104
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UC, are you familiar with this scripture and the prayer that's used from it?

Hosea 2:6-7


Me 47 - W 35
M 9 - T 10
2 Daughters - 7 & 9
Discovery of EA- 8/4/14
S - 8/5/15
D mentioned - 9/11/14
R & Piecing - 3/17/15
Regard one another as more important than yourselves.
- Philippians 2:3
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I'm familiar with Hosea & Gomer, but not the specific passage & prayer you mention. Please share...


UpperCut
Me: 28 W: 25
Married: 4 yrs Together: 7 yrs
Dday: 9/14 (W ends affair & comes home)
S: 12/14 (W restarted affair 1/15; moved near OM 2/15)
No kids
Joined: Sep 2014
Posts: 1,104
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Just Google this: Hosea 2:6-7
Multiple links of the prayer should show up starting at the bottom of the first page forward.


Me 47 - W 35
M 9 - T 10
2 Daughters - 7 & 9
Discovery of EA- 8/4/14
S - 8/5/15
D mentioned - 9/11/14
R & Piecing - 3/17/15
Regard one another as more important than yourselves.
- Philippians 2:3
Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 177
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Thanks Jefe. That was a good read and some good prayers for LBSs.

W is back in town after her month of travel to visit friends, family, and attend a conference. She is texting me quite a bit trying to get things sorted out. She didn't bother to update her acct info for her student loan payout, so it went to our now closed joint checking account. Which means it won't go through. Durrr

She also does not appear to understand the concept of hiring an attorney... She seems to think my attorney is "our" attorney. We have a meeting with a mediator scheduled for next week. After which I will meet with my attorney to write up the agreement.

Not that surprising, but apparently the friends she is living with are moving to OM's home town and she is moving with them. So she is probably going to quit her job to be with these friends and (surprise) closer to OM and try to volunteer with OM's company. While living off financial aid money. Wow. Go W. That plan is guaranteed to blow up in her face. Especially since OM's boss was the one saying he didn't want to hire W because she would be an HR nightmare, being a young, attractive, recently divorced woman...


UpperCut
Me: 28 W: 25
Married: 4 yrs Together: 7 yrs
Dday: 9/14 (W ends affair & comes home)
S: 12/14 (W restarted affair 1/15; moved near OM 2/15)
No kids
Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 177
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Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 177
W landed a job working for OM's boss. So that's why she is moving... And that's why she is in a hurry to get things wrapped up with our separation.


UpperCut
Me: 28 W: 25
Married: 4 yrs Together: 7 yrs
Dday: 9/14 (W ends affair & comes home)
S: 12/14 (W restarted affair 1/15; moved near OM 2/15)
No kids
Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 177
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Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 177
W had not been in contact with OM for 4 months, I was able to verify that.

Intel shows they talked for an hour last night. Looks like the affair is back on.

W is going to OM's city today to look for apartments and a new car. Her new job starts there in 2 weeks. She and I were supposed to meet up Sunday to discuss S. Wonder if she will still show up.


UpperCut
Me: 28 W: 25
Married: 4 yrs Together: 7 yrs
Dday: 9/14 (W ends affair & comes home)
S: 12/14 (W restarted affair 1/15; moved near OM 2/15)
No kids
Joined: Dec 2014
Posts: 561
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Are you snooping?
If yes what are your reasons for that?
(Not an expert on this but someone asked me the same question in my stitch and its a legitimate question)


Me 32 (German) Wife 28
T 3yrs M 2yrs
Moved to US for W
No kids
BD 6/2014
In house separation
Confirmed EA 1/2015
(ongoing since BD)
OM not ready
Real D talk started 1/27/15


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Originally Posted By: Complex
Are you snooping?
If yes what are your reasons for that?
(Not an expert on this but someone asked me the same question in my stitch and its a legitimate question)


You can snoop to determine what you are up against and her state of mind in these events. How she is potraying you outside of your four walls. Many cheater will potray the betrayed in a horrible light. You won't know unless you check.

Also you can determine the games she's running and the things she is attracted to.

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