I completely agree with you. She's spending all her time with OM and leaving our daughter with babysitter multiple times a week. She claimed she's happy now and not thinking about our marriage anymore. More power to her. I wish her all the best. I'm working on me and focusing on what's broken in my life. She's no longer a factor. My time to talk to her is not now. I'm patiently waiting for the day the wax on her face is magically erased and reality set in that am long gone. I honestly don't understand why a woman will fall for a guy that called her names on social media. I guess she's getting all the fun she want with a guy that called her names on Fb. I've done my part to save her but she doesn't want to be saved. She's no longer my problem.
I completely agree with you. She's spending all her time with OM and leaving our daughter with babysitter multiple times a week.
WAS don't often put others first.
Originally Posted By: Lost!
She claimed she's happy now and not thinking about our marriage anymore.
She's being honest with you. It may or may not be the whole truth.
Originally Posted By: Lost!
She's no longer a factor. My time to talk to her is not now. I'm patiently waiting for the day the wax on her face is magically erased and reality set in that am long gone. I honestly don't understand why a woman will fall for a guy that called her names on social media. I guess she's getting all the fun she want with a guy that called her names on Fb. I've done my part to save her but she doesn't want to be saved. She's no longer my problem.
Waiting for reality to set in? Are you serious? Is there bitterness somewhere? I'm not saying it's wrong to feel that way but acknowledging it and letting go speeds up your own personal healing.
Look, you are still very early in your sitch. Have you even begin to look at your own problems and your part in the failure of your M? Have you start forgiving yourself?
M35 XW34 D5 D4 M 6years T 10years Bomb 5/2013 Joint Petition signed 6/2013 Moved out end of 8/2013 Court Hearing of Joint Petition 9/2013 D finalized in 3 months - no news yet
Let's face it, my self respect will take a huge it for while with w ongoing affair. How do a man respect himself staying with a woman who can't or won't value him?
Respect for yourself isn't reliant on someone or something. It comes from yourself. When I was going through the issue with my W, people would say the same thing since she was gone for years. It didn't bother me because I was strong enough in myself that it didn't matter. AND I didn't harbor any resentment towards her either no matter how bad things got.
You're focusing too much on your W.
M-43 W-40 2D - 9 and 5
Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet a new life.
I'm honestly not focusing on what she's doing anymore. I'm working on me and trying to be strong for my daughter. She's deep in this and nothing I say at this point can stop it. It's a waiting game at this point. I'm taking the time to take care of business and working on me. She already made it clear that our marriage is over and I need to move on with my life. Her family no longer talk to me or include me in there weekly group text. This is my opportunity to work on me, either for the good or bad.
None. No bitterness other than disappointment. I went through a lot and still dealing with same BS. Any man will honestly be disappointed. I'm just working on doing me and focusing all my attention on my daughter. I can only control me and not what she doing. Our relationship is different. I don't get to see her every day or every week. I see her every month and that's it. She get to see OM everyday. They work together and reside in same city. I can not compete with that. We are talking about relationship affair here now. Her family knows about OM already. I no longer have any communication with them anymore. I've my beautiful daughter. She's my joy and everything.
I understand perfectly what you are going through. I am too disappointed at my XW's choices but it is hers to make for whatever reason she deemed fit.
Originally Posted By: Lost!
I don't get to see her every day or every week. I see her every month and that's it. She get to see OM everyday. They work together and reside in same city. I can not compete with that. We are talking about relationship affair here now. Her family knows about OM already. I no longer have any communication with them anymore.
Is there a reason why you can't schedule more time with your daughter? Why do you feel the need to compete? Still obsessing over the affair? Is there a fear that your kids will be more attached to OM? Do you still want to communicate with W's family? What's stopping you?
FYI, the OM in my sitch became XW's BF, now that we are divorced. Likewise, her family accepts him now. I still visit my kids at XW's on weekdays which btw is my former home. OM/BF is staying over there now so he gets to be with my kids more than I do. I do suspect that he tries to get my attention sometimes. I choose to ignore. He will not be a hindrance. My time with the kids is my time with the kids. I am still 'papa' to my kids and they know it.
M35 XW34 D5 D4 M 6years T 10years Bomb 5/2013 Joint Petition signed 6/2013 Moved out end of 8/2013 Court Hearing of Joint Petition 9/2013 D finalized in 3 months - no news yet
I know. I really have to think deep about that one. I just feel bad that I allow her to do so much to me. She's now changing the story and turning herself to the victim. I guess she need to justify her actions.
I live 14hrs away from my daughter, it will cost me at least $500 a week to visit her every week. I'm currently not working so doing that is taking everything I have saved up to carry me for the next couple of months. Regarding talking to her family, she already told them not to talk to me again. None of her family answer my phone calls, except for her dad who owes me money. I was there favorite son in law not until all this happened. I'm not upset because I'll do the same for my daughter. Regardless of what w did to me, that will not change the bond between them. Her sister was the one that told her to go ahead with the divorce. She told her sleeping with another man why married will look bad on her. I don't know what she's thinking or doing. I care less at this point. I'm only trying to get my life back together and take care of my daughter. I still pay $1400 in daycare every month, another $500 for food and supplies for her. I've stopped paying her bills. I spent about 2k a month taking care of my daughter. I'm Thankful to God for giving me the means to do that. I'll not stop loving her and giving me daughter the best care I can afford.
