yes, they are, Wonka, so I don't care....I worry about the bills in my name which is every other one!
Oh he's über sensitive, always has been, I used to bug him that he needed to lighten up and learn to laugh at himself....ooops:)
M 16 T 20 M 41 H 39 S 19 S 15 Bomb drop April 4; Moved out April 13 D started-full force ----------------------- Dancing through the fire Cause I am a champion and you’re gonna hear me ROAR
How the heck did he rack up enough credit card debt that $1400 a month is his PAYMENT??? What was he spending it on? Does he have a gambling or drug problem?
he would put gas, food, this, that on the card....take out cash advances. Stuff for around the house I guess......he's VERY POOR money manager! Always has been....it's been a problem our entire marriage. This was on TWO credit cards iml........his parent's have declared bankruptcy three times. He stated working full time at 15 years old, a working man's wage, lived at home rent free and didn't pay for groceries....still $30K in debt when we married.
I really should have run the other way when we met..........
M 16 T 20 M 41 H 39 S 19 S 15 Bomb drop April 4; Moved out April 13 D started-full force ----------------------- Dancing through the fire Cause I am a champion and you’re gonna hear me ROAR
You may not want to hear this right now, but - if you play your cards right and keep YOUR financial ducks in a row, you'll probably be much better off without him than with him in the long run.
It must have been very stressful to have your financial well-being tied to such a financially incompetent man.
it caused a lot of stress.........my parent's aren't rich, by any stretch, but, they're ok and would help us as best they could..........I've made stupid choices finically, who hasn't?, but, he's a finical disaster.
I'll be OK, financially, as long as I'm smart. Work my as$ off and keep paying my bills
M 16 T 20 M 41 H 39 S 19 S 15 Bomb drop April 4; Moved out April 13 D started-full force ----------------------- Dancing through the fire Cause I am a champion and you’re gonna hear me ROAR
"He didn't leave for another woman or abuse simply because he has not been happy for many years neither one of you have been and instead of wrapping your head around it and accepting your didn't appreciate him and your wanted to control him like a puppet master accepting the truth you go around bad mouthing him. Enjoy the money cause that's all you ended up with in the end."
Do I contact H and ask him to tell him to ask his sister to stop messaging me such negative messages?? How do I handle this one?
M 16 T 20 M 41 H 39 S 19 S 15 Bomb drop April 4; Moved out April 13 D started-full force ----------------------- Dancing through the fire Cause I am a champion and you’re gonna hear me ROAR
I am so sorry that SIL is at this once again. It can be aggravating to have interfering ILs who think they know what's going on and can dole out some 'wisdom.'
Please ignore SIL's rant. H most likely fed ILs lies and more lies about his situation and laying the blame at your feet. The ILs don't know the entire truth and are only hearing H's side of the story which, as you can see, is all gloom and doom about the Court. IT is clear here that H feels really stung by the Court's outcome so he's spewing more venom about you to his family. It is funny to read that SIL is projecting from H that you're badmouthing him!!!
I-G-N-O-R-E messages from SIL. Do not contact H at all.
Hold up your head high and continue riding out on the high road. Continue conducting yourself with integrity and dignity.
WR, Ignore it. She's ramping up because she wants you to feel sorry her brother and give him everything he wants. The best thing to do is ignore the messages. She's only trying to rattle your cage and push you into doing something you don't want to do. It's called bullying you into submission. The best way to deal w/a bully is to ignore their sorry @sses.
File the message away and if she continues down the merry road of bullying file a harassment charge against her. But for now, let her spew and spew and when she realizes you aren't responding, she very well might stop it.
Obviously your h has been running his lips and they've been flapping quite a bit. Notice how when you responded to your h that you hadn't heard from your lawyer, she started back in? Well, I'm going to say this, and I hope that I'm wrong...if you take the bait and respond, this behavior will continue and I wouldn't be surprised if it continued even after the divorce.
You will know when you have had enough of her sh@t and want to file a harassment charge against her. I certainly wouldn't say anything to your h because he may be egging her on to do it. Silence is golden and believe me, nothing gets their goats better than being quiet. File the message away for future use just in case you need to file.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
WR, I also want to share something w/you that I hope I'm wrong about...but because your in-laws are behaving the way they are, you need to be warned. You SIL #1 is acting out and being a nasty bully and SIL #2 is somewhat friendly...the way I see it, they are playing you, i.e., good cop, bad cop, so be careful in what you say to SIL #2. Right now, blood is thicker than water and they are going to gaslight and play you for all it's worth to drive you to do whatever their brother wants or needs. So, my advice, step back from texting either one of them. They are not to be trusted right now. That family is very toxic and will do whatever it takes to bring you to your knees.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
