Happy Thanksgiving! It was this past weekend in Canada (I'm early for my American friends).
Started the w/e by doing a radio interview for the hospital fund raiser (that asked me). It went really well and a number of people heard it and thanked me. I felt good about doing something new for my new community.
The colours are glorious. We enjoyed them in our drives and a chilly outing in the boat. I see buses go by daily with tourists trying to take it all in and the steamship went by yesterday filled to the brim with photographers.
My 2 younger kids arrived for the weekend and Ashley's boyfriend. Brandon had decided a week ago not to come and I was really disappointed. I know this stems a lot from the divorce and some residual feelings of anger. In one of his texts he mentioned that he has not seen his dad in 6 months. I reminded him that his relationship with his dad had nothing to do with me. That I was ALWAYS here for him and would be hurt if he did not come. But that I understood. Part of it is that he does not have a girlfriend and he would be with Josh and I & Ashley and her boyfriend. So I made sure that he and I got in some one on one time.
Saturday was our community Thanksgiving dinner. Josh and I went over and set up on Friday night then we both served on Saturday. We finished in time to have dinner with the kids there - their first opportunity to attend a big event in our new town. It was so nice.
Sunday was our turkey dinner. Josh had ordered a 22 lb fresh turkey as we had 4 friends from Buffalo who were supposed to come. She recently had hip surgery, though and was not up to the drive - so we have turkey, turkey, turkey - turkey galore! It was so yummy, though.
Played a couple of games including one where we answer questions. That's always a bit enlightening. One question was "What would you do if you won the lottery". Both of my children answered (in slightly different ways) that they would buy houses in my new town (they currently live 2 & 3 hours away) and also that they would buy homes in Florida. Just like Mom! Interesting... I had been getting the feeling they were pulling away - not wanting so much togetherness.
Another interesting thing. They did not mention their father one time. He usually comes up in conversation in some form at every event but not this one. Ashley was here 3 nights, Brandon, 2. She drove him home. Neither made any attempt to phone him. It's kind of sad. 2 years ago he sat them down and talked to them about burying the hatchet, coming for Thanksgiving or another family type dinner and they pondered it. But for them - that would mean accepting maggot and they have made it clear - no way! Part of me gets that - I don't want anything to do with her either, but part of me feels so sad for them. He does see them for their birthdays and Christmas but not much besides that. If it were me - I would take them on a small holiday or away for a weekend for that one on one time without maggot - not force her on them. But it's his choice. He IS seeing Ryan this w/e. He asked me to have Ryan's nurse bring him to the mall (about 90 min away) and they will visit.
And I'm off to Disney World with Ryan and 2 workers in just 11 days! If you recall - we had to cancel his trip 2 years ago as he was in a coma. I am SO grateful at another chance. He has been good since his release from hospital in August. I thank God every day for that - my greatest gift.
Long post, I know. Life after divorce for me is pretty good. But I'm living one day at a time. And putting one foot in front of the other. And that's the best I can do.
It sounds like you have a great attitude and a great life!
I have noticed with my adult children that they pull away, then come closer. I always visualize a giant rubber band. They streach away, then pull back. I just try to let them all do their own thing when they need to!
I am not looking forward to the part of my future where my X wants to bring OW around our kids. They all met her before, when she was my pretend friend. I guess we will cross that bridge when we come to it.
I hope your trip to Disney World goes well. Disney has First Aid buildings where you can get a locker to store medical supplies and to have a place to go to do medical stuff privatly. We used it to carry in our sons nebulizer machine and have a place for him to do breathing treatments. Oh the memories!
Me 57 XH 58 Sons age 32 & 27 M:32 D final 9/12 Bought 10 Acres and Living the Dream!
Interesting - about that lottery question. My son said he would buy a place in either Florida or Hawaii. The kids LOVED our trips to Hawaii. I'm hoping to take them next year if they can get the time off.
I'm hoping NEVER to have maggot around my family. I do not trust her. I know he brings her around Ryan. Not much I can do but that really bothers the other kids since Ryan can't voice his displeasure.
Thanks for the info on Dis. I never knew that. I have been so many times and taken Ryan several as well but there's still so much to learn and he is not as mobile as he used to be.
Yes, that is something new. You have to take a letter from the doctor explaining the nature of the disability and that it is difficult for him to stand in line. It used to be that way but the past 2 trips - they made him wait. Very frustrating.
Thats right Barb, my sister and family used it last time they were all there, came in real handy, also my sister's sis in law is handicapped in a wheelchair and they do get the special passes to go to the front of the lines, I figured you may know this, in fact even when my son had a walking cast on they offered it to him, but he didnt use it. How fun for Ryan! really need to get to D.land myself again soon!
Be Happy for this Moment, This Moment is your Life
Spent the past week in Disney World with Ryan and 2 workers. We had a total blast! Ry was alert and very happy. We have some wonderful pics - especially when he is with characters (he was really laughing a lot) and also when we all dressed up as the Wizard of Oz to go to Mickey's Not So Scary Halloween Party. Everyone loved our outfits and Ryan stayed awake till midnight!
Disney folks were extremely helpful and I really had the right girls with me. We were all tired but happy. Got home late Friday night.
Now I'm heading back to Florida with the little car I bought from my friends - filled to the rooftop with furniture & decor for the condo. I did have to cancel the Autotrain (which would have cut my driving nearly in half) due to Hurricane Sandy. I'm driving further west to avoid the storm. Had planned to leave Tues morning. Considering going sooner but maybe I'll go back to the Tues plan and just go as far as the going is good, stopping when it's not.
Had a great w/e with Josh. He really is the best! He has taken the kitties to Toronto to be with him during the week. He brought them back here to see me this w/e and took them back again today. I will miss them. When I'm back in Florida Jan to Mar I'm flying down with them and he is carryone one down while my sister will carry one home with me. Lucky cats!
I've reached my Happy Place again. Fought my way around the storm - rebooked the Autotrain a day later (first train since Sandy) and drove 16 hours as well. But I'm back in the sunshine and it is glorious! They predict one of the best weekends of the year.
Lots to do here - everything needs to be cleaned - a bit musty - was so stormy when I left. So lucky to have a reliable handyman - he came over as soon as I arrived to help get heavy furniture out of my car and tommorrow he is coming to clean and bleach all the ceilings - they're a little grey from the humidity.
So I have 3 weeks of relaxing in the sun, catching up with friends, Christmas shopping etc. Ecstatic!