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Joined: Jan 2009
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what is your current legal child custody situation?
no bs,
what has been decided so far legally?

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Joint with stbex having the real power for now.


M40, W 37
M 11 1/2 y
T 13 y
D filed 5-18-10
S 5-29-10 OM1 discovered 6-5-10
Counter sued for d 6-16-10
OM2 discovered 8-10-10
OM3, OM4
4 kids 10, 7, & 3
D date 10-14-10
http://tiny.cc/mxzct
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Originally Posted By: 40andsadintexas
Joint with stbex having the real power for now.


Real power?

If it really is joint custody as you say,
was friday her day with the kids?

What's the actual custody schedule like?
How is it that you got to have the kids friday evening?

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Right now we are on every other weekend plus mid week overnights. We are still running on the tempoary orders. This weekend is my weekend. When the stbex called me at 12:00 and said she was leaving town then the right to get kids automatically goes to me. To keep me from getting the kids she called me and told me she was driving back to town to pick up the kids. She didn't she lied. She had no thoughts of heading back to town


M40, W 37
M 11 1/2 y
T 13 y
D filed 5-18-10
S 5-29-10 OM1 discovered 6-5-10
Counter sued for d 6-16-10
OM2 discovered 8-10-10
OM3, OM4
4 kids 10, 7, & 3
D date 10-14-10
http://tiny.cc/mxzct
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is exchanging the children through a 3rd party (ie. your in-laws) part of the deal legally?

Do you believe she planned to keep you away from the kids for 2.5 hours on purpose? Just to make you angry?

Seems to me like there is too much room for change in this schedule you have, it is way to flexible and probably not in a good way, not for you at any rate.

The schedule should days and times outlined clearly,
it should mention who picks up the kids on certain days, if someone drops them off, what time this happens and to account for variations and lost time. It should also account for issues like what you experienced today, you shouldn't need to deal with the BS of a 3rd party (ie. kids grandparents, her parents/your in-laws), the kid exchange doesn't need to involve any exchange of words or pleasantries, it's just a waste of your time and the kids tend to experience more discomfort when they hear these words more than the parties involved.

Speak to your lawyer, get him involved if necessary, let your wife know that you're going to make an amendment to the existing custody schedule because you're tired of this bull$hit and also that you're documenting what happened today because it isn't the first time and if you don't do anything, she'll continue to do this over and over again. If she wasn't planning on "driving back to town", you should have picked up your kids directly from school and you shouldn't have had any interaction with your in-laws or your sister in law.

Stop worrying about her parents and her sister being "morally bankrupt", I'm sure your wife has told them a million things about you that justifies her actions right now. You were a prick, you were abusive, you were this and that and the other thing, it doesn't matter if any of it is true, perception is king in these matters, it's how people see you and she has painted a picture of you which isn't flattering, you are the bad guy even if she's the one humping the entire football team.

As for you, you need to start dating other women and you need to get your wife off your mind. If you had done this, you wouldn't worry about how many men your wife has been with, if she has really been through several men, smile and be happy. You have found out this is the kind of woman she is and she is clearly a waste of your time and she is clearly a waste of several other men's time as well because she seems to be the common denominator in all of this, including you, that's 5 men so far, quite a few men to go through in such a short period of time.

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I really can't start dating right now we are in the middle of a custody battle and I have to be the better person. Knowing the judge we have he is very intolerant of people messing around. I am happy my wife is messing around with mupital men it just makes my custody case that much better. I could care less what she does I am through with her. This is all about the kids and getting custody.
Monda


M40, W 37
M 11 1/2 y
T 13 y
D filed 5-18-10
S 5-29-10 OM1 discovered 6-5-10
Counter sued for d 6-16-10
OM2 discovered 8-10-10
OM3, OM4
4 kids 10, 7, & 3
D date 10-14-10
http://tiny.cc/mxzct
Joined: Aug 2010
Posts: 299
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Monday my plan is to go to the lawyer and get the stbex back in court to modify the temporary orders so I will pick them up at school on fridays then return them to school the following Monday and have a first refusal clause in the agreement. It should take 2 weeks to get into court and will probably cost another thousand dollars to get a hearing set up. With the court we are in and the judge we have and my stbex taking my kids around all the men she is dating I have been told she has dug herself a very deep hole. My lawyer said we got her


M40, W 37
M 11 1/2 y
T 13 y
D filed 5-18-10
S 5-29-10 OM1 discovered 6-5-10
Counter sued for d 6-16-10
OM2 discovered 8-10-10
OM3, OM4
4 kids 10, 7, & 3
D date 10-14-10
http://tiny.cc/mxzct
Joined: Aug 2010
Posts: 299
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24 hours removed from the wife and mother inlaw lying now not sure if it's a big enough deal to try to get her back in court or not. Just don't know


M40, W 37
M 11 1/2 y
T 13 y
D filed 5-18-10
S 5-29-10 OM1 discovered 6-5-10
Counter sued for d 6-16-10
OM2 discovered 8-10-10
OM3, OM4
4 kids 10, 7, & 3
D date 10-14-10
http://tiny.cc/mxzct
Joined: Jun 2010
Posts: 945
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Do it. Get the right of first refusal inserted into the clause. Get times/places for exchange documented.

I really feel bad for you 40. This is craziness. At leas my STBXW and I are still on good enough terms that we are very flexible about kids exchanges and the timing depending upon what events are taking place. A couple hours here or there isn't a big deal for us, but you definitely shouldn't have to put up with this kind of shlt.

Just get it dont and then keep documenting all of the infractions. You will get the custody you seek.

Hang in there man. Do you have any idea when this will be final? Do you have a final court date yet? What a nightmare.

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You should definately go to court on this. Think of it as fighting for the only good thing out of this marriage...your children. Do it for them. Dont roll over and make things easy for her. She needs to feel the consequences of her behavior.

Robx is right about the inlaws, no matter how moral they are they always want to keep thier daughter in thier lives.

Man, I'd be out for blood if I was in your place. You're a btter man than me.


Formerly SGfan
M:38
W:33
M:8 yrs
T:10 yrs
Bomb: Dec '08
Separated: 4/18/09
Divorce: 8/28/09
XW Affair began: April 08
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