Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Page 5 of 15 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 14 15
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 2,240
T
Member
Offline
Member
T
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 2,240
Originally Posted By: Puppy Dog Tails
At least SOME do.


I don't think it's limited by gender at all. I think it stems from the fact that very few people understand what makes a healthy relationship work. Some people may just be sensitive or mature enough to "get it", while the rest of us need to learn the hard way.

That is where the work we should be doing on ourselves is so important -- we learn how to recognize those tendencies and qualities in ourselves, and how to deal with them.

(And you can add my votes for "sensitive", "intelligent", and "possessing of a sense of humor" to the pool.)


Me: 44, Wife: 39
M: 17 years T: 20 years
Bomb on 08/25/09
1/13/10: MC started
1/28/10, 2/8/10: More bombs
8/28/10: Wife moved out
No talk of D, no movement

"Every day is another chance to get it right."
Joined: Nov 2007
Posts: 1,478
K
Member
Offline
Member
K
Joined: Nov 2007
Posts: 1,478
Originally Posted By: Puppy Dog Tails
Originally Posted By: Kimmie Lee


I think it was Candice Bergen who said that men say they want a confident, independent woman, but then they tear her down, brick by brick.


I think you could easily say the same thing in reverse, Kimmie Lee. Women SAY they want a strong, confident man, and then they proceed to nag him and emasculate him, and tell him how he's doing everything wrong.

At least SOME do.

Puppy


The exact quote is:

Men say they love independence in a woman, but they don't waste a second demolishing it brick by brick.
Quotation of Candice Bergen


I guess I relate to this so much because not long after I married, My h began nagging me to quit my job(a career I had worked hard to get, and he knew that when he met me) and stay home. HA! THAT would have been a good move.

I just don't get why people simply cannot accept you for who are.

Last edited by Kimmie Lee; 03/26/10 04:27 PM.
Joined: Feb 2008
Posts: 18,296
P
Member
Offline
Member
P
Joined: Feb 2008
Posts: 18,296
Originally Posted By: Kimmie Lee


I just don't get why people simply cannot accept you for who are.


I agree.

Puppy

Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 2,466
F
Member
Offline
Member
F
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 2,466
Originally Posted By: DumpedforMIL
my problem is that men like women who can stand up for themselves.
i can stand up for myself but it comes off as being a b*tch.
DFM, I think that a lot of "strong" women struggle with this...I know I do. We may have a strong sense of ourselves, but if our actions don't come from a place of true self-confidence and self-worth then what we project won't come off right. There aren't many positive role models for feminine assertiveness. I learned a lot from Why Men Love Bitches about how a woman can assert herself in a more attractive way, how she can project self-worth in how she manages power dynamics in a R.

Last edited by flowmom; 03/26/10 04:31 PM.

me: 42 | STBXH: 41 | T: 18 | M: 10 | separation: Jan 3, 2010 | they deserve better: S7 & D4
current thread: http://tinyurl.com/3y8sxcp
.: first breathe, then heal, then start LIVING :.
Joined: Nov 2007
Posts: 1,478
K
Member
Offline
Member
K
Joined: Nov 2007
Posts: 1,478
Yes, God forbid we don't come across as "attractive."

Do men worry about this?

Joined: Feb 2008
Posts: 18,296
P
Member
Offline
Member
P
Joined: Feb 2008
Posts: 18,296
Originally Posted By: Kimmie Lee
Yes, God forbid we don't come across as "attractive."

Do men worry about this?


No. We just worry our penises are too small. shocked

Puppy

Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 3,975
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 3,975
Puppy must not be a Great Dane?


Me-46, D-21, S15, S13

After many years w/my head in the sand...
I FILED
Divorced 6/2011

The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 516
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 516
It is not the size that matters. But rather all in how you work it. grin


Me & H: 33 yrs
S: 4 & 6
D: 2
M: 9 yrs
ILYBNILWY: 8/09
SEPARATED: 9/09
The Beginning
Joined: Feb 2008
Posts: 18,296
P
Member
Offline
Member
P
Joined: Feb 2008
Posts: 18,296
Originally Posted By: mindfull
Puppy must not be a Great Dane?


LMAO.

There's an old Polish proverb, which says "Even the Dane frets that he's not the Wolfhound."

Puppy

Joined: Sep 2008
Posts: 2,105
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Sep 2008
Posts: 2,105
WOW...this thread has taken a dive.... blush


Current Thread
Page 5 of 15 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 14 15

Moderated by  Cadet, DnJ, job, Michele Weiner-Davis 

Link Copied to Clipboard