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Ya, dancing. It is an esape for me. It is fun and when I am on the dance floor, it's like everything else disapears. I can just focus on my technique and who I am dancing with and just have fun.

I was talking to a friend of mine about it and she said that is why most people are dancing because it allows you to escape from everything else going on in your life for a while.

Interesting.

Kevin


Me 36, W 37
M: 08/02/97
D13, D9
1st Bomb 02/08
Reconciled 04/08
2nd Bomb: 09/08
W filed for D 02/04/09
Separated 03/09
D dismissed 06/09/09
Still separated...
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If you are looking for a new activity that can sort of "take you away" try yoga. I LOVE my yoga classes and there are several men in any give class. Many studios allow you to pay as you go so you don't have to commit to a block of classes. All you really need is a yoga mat and comfortable clothes.

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For me its walking, bike riding or lifting weights to get my mind off the stresses of the day. Oh yeah and of course baking grin

Keep up the good work Kev


Me-44
WAW-42 (ILYBNILWY)
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S-14
M-10/17/1992 T23
Met OM 10/10/08; Bomb 12/27/08; Moved in with OM 01/27/09
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Originally Posted By: CityGirl
If you are looking for a new activity that can sort of "take you away" try yoga. I LOVE my yoga classes and there are several men in any give class. Many studios allow you to pay as you go so you don't have to commit to a block of classes. All you really need is a yoga mat and comfortable clothes.


whats your favorite pose?

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I love yoga. So good for your body and mind.


Me: 46 FWS: 36
Married and Divorced 4/07, Pregnant 7/07,False R 7/07
Baby Girl born 3/08
Kicked him out because OW: 7/08
5/10 He realized what he had and lost.
Moved home! REMARRIED 3/14/11!!
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Originally Posted By: K4D
Ya, dancing. It is an esape for me. It is fun and when I am on the dance floor, it's like everything else disapears. I can just focus on my technique and who I am dancing with and just have fun.

I was talking to a friend of mine about it and she said that is why most people are dancing because it allows you to escape from everything else going on in your life for a while.

Interesting.

Kevin


"Satisfaction came in a chain reaction. I couldn't get enough, so I had to strut my stuff!" laugh


"Always go straight forward, and if you meet the devil, cut him in two and go between the pieces." - William Sturgis, clipper ship captain, 1830's.
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All in all, communication is improving between me and W. We chatted online for a couple of hours today.

We talked about things such as what is going on in the lives of our daughters and things coming up with them and their feelings and concerns on things. We also chatted on where we are both looking to move and now W is thinking about possibly looking at the same apartment complex I am looking at to save money and not have to do maintenance and be close by for the girls.

She contacted me first today to mainly talk about D12's comments to her about wondering if they were going to do anything fun over here with me this weekend. D12 said I don't spend very much money. Well, I don't compared to what W and her fammily drop on things. I said I am creative though and do things with them that they enjoy. She said she tried to explain to D12 finances, etc to make her basically understand that money doesn't grow on trees.

I talked about teaching the girls how to dance again and W said she would be in on that when they are with her as well and just a bunch of other things.

At the end of it she told me to have a good night. I said you to. She said thanks.

Just the fact that we were able to chat about things for a couple of hours today was encouraging.

All in all, positive lines of communication are opening up a bit more frequently now. She asked if I had any plans tonight. I said I am studying trying to prepare for this job. She doesn't know that I have actually struggled at times with focusing and am behind on my own personal schedule. But what I don't finish, I will pick up on the job.

She does seem to be reaching out more and taking a bit more interest in me these days, but still a long ways off from an ideal situation.

Baby steps I guess. 19 months later and some doors are finally starting to just crack open between us. It has been a rough 19 months and hard to believe it has taken this long just to start to crack the positive lines of communication. But better late than never.

It is a start in the right direction and it is encouraging that she is starting to look at friendship with time and doing things together without the kids with time.

I have no expectations what that time frame may be as I would never have guessed it would have taken 19 months just to get to this point.

Kevin


Me 36, W 37
M: 08/02/97
D13, D9
1st Bomb 02/08
Reconciled 04/08
2nd Bomb: 09/08
W filed for D 02/04/09
Separated 03/09
D dismissed 06/09/09
Still separated...
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Hallelujah! Kevin you've just achieved what all of us have been trying to tell you that you needed to do. You went out, GAL, kept all pressure off your W, stopped being judgemental and now things are starting to get better between you two.

You've gotten the ah ha point. Not saying this will be for R, but you start with having positive interactions and take care of yourself.

Great job!


M-43 W-40
2D - 9 and 5

Emotion, yet peace.
Ignorance, yet knowledge.
Passion, yet serenity.
Chaos, yet harmony.
Death, yet a new life.

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Thanks Bond,

I have been trying to break the old Kevin.

It is still a very long road ahead, I have no doubt. But it is nice to see some tiny cracks starting to form in the wall I have faced for so long now.

Kevin


Me 36, W 37
M: 08/02/97
D13, D9
1st Bomb 02/08
Reconciled 04/08
2nd Bomb: 09/08
W filed for D 02/04/09
Separated 03/09
D dismissed 06/09/09
Still separated...
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Sounds good. Just keep on detaching. NO EXPECTATIONS.

Remember she is still way ahead of you in detaching and is at a different place.

She might be thinking "friends". You are thinking friends leading to something else.

My friend got to this point as well then was asked by his WAW to double date with her boyfriend sometime. Needless to say it didnt go over well.

Keep on hoping for the best and preparing for the worst.

You sound good. Keep on breaking that "co-dependent" dynamic.

God Speed. PMA

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