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Well bit of a turn around today. CSA have finally agreed to progress my claim for maintenance. Not sure what will happen if XH does put a challenge in but at least for now he will have to pay.

D14 now decided not to go to XHs wedding after all. So none of his children will be there. I understand OWs parents arent coming either but to be frank if what XH said about only finding out the date on Sunday is true then no wonder they arne't coming. I imagine it takes longer than that to organise flights from Czech republic etc.


This is all so very bizarre.


Me 43
XH 45
M 2.7.88
Divorce 7.10.09
Kids D20,S17 & D15
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The drama continues, 'eh!? I think someone said before, it's like a soap opera in your XH's household.


Me:57 H:52 M:28 Got another lawyer last year and filed.
D35,S/D twins28,D22
EA4/04 End? Who knows?
"Life is like a mirror. Smile at it and it smiles back at you." — Peace Pilgrim
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Hi Ally - what a charmer.

I understand how you feel. I remember I got my final divorce papers came through on the day my X remarried (that was pretty classy).

I don't know if this will make you feel any better - but my X has since told me (mature man that he is) that "she made me get married, I didn't really want to, but I couldn't get any peace until I just agreed to do it" - could be yours is going through a similar thing.

Alison - I know this sux. I know that the next few days are going to be really tough for you - but you are strong and you are getting stronger everyday. Your kids are figuring it out and you are about to start the next part of your life journey. It's exciting really.

I can't find you on Facebook. Look me up - Virginia Perkins in Australia. There's a photo of me, it's just my face, i've got a curly bob - my hair is blowing in my face in the photo.

Thinking of you. Take care, V


V

Never make someone a priority, who makes you an option.
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Thanks everyone.

I totally lost it yesterday. S17 decided he would go to the wedding after all. I am so disappointed in him. I really thought he would do the right thing this time. He wouldn't admit but he has clearly had pressure put on him to go to the wedding. As far as I know he went.

So I sobbed all night last night. I did go into work but only because I was covering for someone else's annual leave and it was a job that could not go undone. I came home again as soon as that was finished. I slept most of the afternoon and I do feel better for it but I can't tell you how down I feel. It's almost like being back at the very start of all this c**p.

My mother phoned this evening. She cannot understand why after 4yrs and a D I am still affected by this. I told her it will never completely go away. You don't spend 23yrs of your life with someone and then just forget about them.

Virginia I'm going to look you up now


Me 43
XH 45
M 2.7.88
Divorce 7.10.09
Kids D20,S17 & D15
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acj, I hear you and I feel for you, remember I have been through this and know how gut wrenching it is, and yes it hurts and it is also hard to understand how other people whether it be your parents, family or close friends dont understand how you feel whether it be 4 days, 4 weeks or 4 years since it all started, I have to admit I have moved on a lot of late and dont think or at least I hope not, that there is anything else my ex can do to hurt me, but saying that yes I still cannot believe what this as all come to and like yousay after spending so much time and years with someone, and that someone turning out to be someone you never really knew at all, it is hard acj I agree it is hard. take care honey

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Okay, so the worst has happened... it's gotta be all downhill from here. You don't have to dread it anymore.

Maybe your S went, but your Ds still boycotted. That's something, anyway.

I hope you are feeling better today.

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Hope you are doing better. I have been thinking of you.

kat


Me-53(and learning!)
S24, S21, D18, D17
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The kids get torn in this mess. They have to make their own decisions. Sons don't want to disappoint their fathers. Smile and let it be. He will eventually figure out the truth.

I am praying for you and I think about your situation often. I know I will be in the same place probably sooner than later.
It is so amazing that these guys can forget about the 20+ years of marriage. It is so painful. I remember my wedding day like it was yesterday.

This is so hard on you because you planned on staying married for life, you meant your vows, and you kept your committment. Your difficutly in getting over this is just a reflection on what a quality individual you are.


Me: 46 H:44
Together: 25 years
Married: 20 years
Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07
OW: EA began 2005
PA began end of 2006
3 children,20, 16, 6
ex asked for forgiveness
01/16/11

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Kat & Trusting,
Thanks for looking in on me. I'm fine this week. It was just the enormity of the day that got to me last week.

CSA have finally come back to me with a figure for maintenance. Because D14 only spends half her time with me I am entitled to a whopping £22.50 a week from XH. That won't keep her in hairspray let alone food grin I did challenge it but they broke down the calculations for me and it is right. I'm really worried about not being able to pay my new mortgage when it kicks in next week. Ironically this is all down to the choices my two younger children have made (with manipulation from XH). I've tried explaining this to them but they just see it as me trying to stop them seeing thier dad. What they don't realise is that if I do have to sell I will have to leave the area to be able to afford somewhere else. Thier life is here and they wouldnt come with me so then XH will have totally achieved what he set out to do. I just wish they could see that. Unfortunately the rose tinted glasses are still welll and truely on.


Me 43
XH 45
M 2.7.88
Divorce 7.10.09
Kids D20,S17 & D15
Joined: Nov 2007
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It takes time, but truth always prevails.


Me: 46 H:44
Together: 25 years
Married: 20 years
Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07
OW: EA began 2005
PA began end of 2006
3 children,20, 16, 6
ex asked for forgiveness
01/16/11

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