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#1775947 06/01/09 02:24 AM
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I'm goin' to Louisiana, gonna get me a mojo hand,
I'm goin' to Louisiana, boys, and get me a mojo hand.
I'm gonna get my mojo hand, yeah, I'm gonna bring it back home.


--Lightnin' Hopkins
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RNDJF4azgog

Well, when last we convened, Coach had advised me (via Greek) to "Use [my] Mulligan."

Coach and Greek recommended "to get in there and love her through it/out of" the crisis WAW seems to be in.

Sara advised me not to "let that Retrouvaille thought [WAW mentioned] fall on the floor and die there."

After a bit of a spat around lunch yesterday, WAW sent the aforementioned e-mail that included the reference to "that Catholic thing" her Friend had used with Wayward Adulterous H.

We took the kids to the movies as planned -- "Up," simply amazing outstanding unbelievable and very adult (and not just by Pixar standards) -- went the four of us to a pleasant dinner (spanakopita for me, Greek, thank you very much), put the kids to bed, and then watched (at opposite ends of the sofa) a bit of the old teevee before retiring to our respective beds.

This morning -- more good vibes, got along well; WAW went on her long run for the charity marathon, I got the kids underway. I had to put some meat in the broiler lest it spoil and asked her if I could make her a lunch to take to the office (she needed to catch up on paperwork today); after starting to say, "You don't have to --" she caught herself and said, "Sure, thanks, that would be nice." So I boxed her up some butterflied sirloin, yellow rice, and what-not, then she went to work and I went into action with the kid stuff.

S9 needed some gadgetry for school, so from the mall I sent her some photos for consideration. And that's when it began.

In the prepare-to-play-the-Mulligan vein, I'd sent her a link this morning -- not the actual information, no direct pressure -- to the Retrouvaille website.

-----Subject: Catholic Marriage Thing Friend Told You About.

So I had a couple degrees of separation there. And the e-mail body was very circumspect -- this is what Friend was talking about. And just the link -- no editorial comment, just a kind of "click it if you want to" thing, right?

YYYYYeahhhhh, pushing a bit, okay. But in for a penny, in for a pound. Who dares wins. Fortune favors the bold. (Quick, someone get to Wikiquotes before I run out of these little aphorisms!)

And I get this e-mail -- I've rearranged the phrasing a bit for anonymity but not the message -- in response about 4 hours later:

I am open to this, but I do think we need a little space and time to cool off a bit. I think it would be more productive if we had a few more days like yesterday. [And some more, rather less pressing comments.]

I replied, validating, applauding the courage, etc. And I added in the reply: "I hope you don't think I'm trying to force you into anything. I accept where we are. The resistance days are over -- you said so yourself. You brought it up, and it's just something that's out there, if at any point we think it might be worth exploring."

To which she replied (almost immediately) No, I don't see forcing or begging. And I don't want you to think that my pride, big as it is, would keep us from reconciling. I do feel that a lot of people including you don't give me enough credit for the feelings I have about what I've lost.... Just because we're in this situation at the moment doesn't mean that this is the result I wanted or that I see this as the only possible permanent outcome.

So I need to get down to Lou's'ana and get me a mojo hand.

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1) http://tinyurl.com/daegpj ... 6) http://tinyurl.com/qznvs2
2) http://tinyurl.com/d2frft ... 7) http://tinyurl.com/pqewxf
3) http://tinyurl.com/c9dtcw ... 8) http://tinyurl.com/r7nzst
4) http://tinyurl.com/cpr2jz ... 9) http://tinyurl.com/njxtjq
5) http://tinyurl.com/d3k4e9

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Wow! This sounds good, SP!!


Can't keep a good woman down
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Quote:
YYYYYeahhhhh, pushing a bit, okay. But in for a penny, in for a pound. Who dares wins. Fortune favors the bold. (Quick, someone get to Wikiquotes before I run out of these little aphorisms!)


Nothing ventured, nothing gained! Good job, SP!

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Excellent. It would not hurt to contact the local group for info on upcoming weekends. There's a very good tri-fold brochure that they give out. Maybe he could send one to you.

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Oh, and I don't remember who asked, yes, my H and I reconciled. We went to Retrouvaille, had a big turnaround at the weekend, and continued to make progress throughout the Post program, and now it is 2 1/2 years later and we just got back from a family cruise. In the past 2 1/2 years I think we have only had angry words twice. Before Retrouvaille, if we spoke to each other, our words were as sharp as knives.

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Unfortunately the next weekend in my area isn't until September, but that's okay -there's the space and cooling off.

And I'm not practicing my end-zone dance just yet; Mrs is more than a little freaked by the growing Reality represented by the receipt of her house keys and the start of June - the month of Kid D-bomb.

So let's say I like the tone, but am going to assume nothing, take nothing for granted, and continue The Work as if nothing has changed. Miles to go before I sleep.

Suffice it to say this night: The corporeally enhanced female has yet to begin to croon.

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Journal oh journal -- a pleasant morning exchange with Herself, nothing much to report. She tried to tell a joke. Of course she can't tell jokes, but that's okay -- she tried, which means she's comfortable enough with our kinda-sorta-maybe equilibrium to not be completely on guard. That's progress. In what direction one does not know. "Hey boys! Land, ho! We found China! Wait, never mind, sorry -- I can see Club Med. It's just Puerto Rico!" But still.....

On the negative side, feel a bit of the old Fear creeping up the spine, in search of the medulla oblongata no doubt. It's hungry, The Fear. It wants to feed.

Today is June 1. 13 days until the day the kids experience the Bomb. Must begin to plan, as Coach said. Must begin to mojoize, junior-version.

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Quote:
On the negative side, feel a bit of the old Fear creeping up the spine, in search of the medulla oblongata no doubt. It's hungry, The Fear. It wants to feed.


What is your worst fear?



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Watch Out! or you'll soon find yourself in my condition: the more indications she gives that she is coming back toward me, the more my mojo evaporates...


Me 42, W 39, S8, S6, S2
M 11y, A & ILYBNILWY 11/08
Walking away from a bad situation.

My Sitch

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A sound warning, indeed, Thinker, but as I noted I am proceeding along the same mojo path. I assume that the battle plan will not survive the first contact. I am operating under the assumption that continued, active DB'ing is the only axis of advance, because WAW is D'ing SP -- full stop. If, in some bizarro alternate galaxy, that doesn't happen, I'll be happy to be surprised.

@alive: My biggest fear? Hmmmm. Off the top of my head, I think it's that I'll have to redirect so much mojo to them -- and properly so -- that I will emerge in a far weaker position for myself, vis-a-vis coping with D. Like Charlotte in Charlotte's Web, I'll take the hit for them. Which is the right thing to do. But from a purely selfish POV does cause some concern.

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