My name is Peggy, I've posted for 2 years in MLC, first as almosthopeless, then as almosthopeful. I was married 21 years, separated 2 of that, and my D was final July 2007. It is past time for me to come over here, so here I am, following BBA, F1, and lissie among others.
My first post is a downer, I apologize, but I need to get it out...
Today my 12 year-old Standard poodle Annie is unconscious in the emergency vet and will probably not recover.
Tonight, my XH marries his SOW. Our S15 will be there. Also our very best couple in friend in the world will be there. They are so terribly stuck in the middle, yet it feels like a huge betrayal and I am struggling.
I know it is customary to serve beverages over here...I have an interesting collection of liquor as a non-drinker who likes to cook with bourbon and wine!
Hi Peggy! Welcome to surviving... not that I hang out here myself. But another big step for you and I just want to say I am following and sending hugs.
My heart goes out to you for getting through this night of loss/betrayal and all. This it seems would be the final last straw, so you can go on w/o so much longing. Except the part about 'why is he w/ someone and I am alone.' Hate that. 2008 will get better from here.
Also hugs for you for your sweet Annie. I have a fondness for standard poodles ever since I met one 25 yrs ago named Amy. xxxx Amy
I am so sorry that these things are piling up on you right now. You have always displayed such grace and dignity, perhaps it is really time to cut loose. A few dances on the kitchen table???? Okay, maybe not....
Hey a nice stroll on the beach sounds wonderful. Maybe some sun in your face and a sea breeze to lift the spirits.
You are a blessing, sweetie. Believe it.
much love
J
PS. Sweetie, I believe that if you weren't having those emotions, you wouldn't be quite human. Or you would be numb...That would stink. Feel them, they are yours.
Oh my Lord in Heaven, please take Peggies hand and help her through this terrible trial in life you have given her. Amen
Peggy,
I am so very sorry. I wish I had more powerful words that could comfort you at this time or even something incredibly witty to say that might put a smile upon your face. There is nothing that could possibly do that right now.
A few more weeks Peggy, Is all I am going to give you before I drive up there. Thats it. I will not accept no for an answer. We need to thoroughly get you out and enoy the afternoon.
Know that your beloved Annie has had a wonderful life, she is loved and will be missed. If it is time for her to go play in the big meadow chasing butterflies just know she will be happy. Oh God I'm sorry......
How can this bastard get married on January Fricken FIRST??? I hope you get some comfort knowing since he is getting MARRIED so quickly after your d that this is probably going to BITE HIM IN THE ASSS SOON!
Don't be surprised if you get a phone call oneday asking you if you've been up to michief. I have his phone #, and I can put some serious MISTRUST into Mrs. SOW's head. Just send me a picture of him and I'll put myself into the picture and then I"LL call her up as I'm sure she's staying at his place and I know his #.
I'm having such bad bad wicked thoughts. I must go and ask for forgivness.
I am truly sorry. This man has no class, no emotions, no sense of decency, no scruples, no morals NO NOTHING!.
Take comfort that you are the exact opposite of him.
{HUGS} my dear friend.
YOU DON'T DRINK???? ok.....I'll drink enough for two.
Luv ya Peggy
Jeanette
Change the Policy. Allow PM's Free all of us.
Also some new and improved emoticons would be nice!
Peggy....after knowing you for so long, and through so much in both of our lives, it's wonderfully intimate to call you by your name.
((( Peggy )))
Sweetie, I cannot tell you how much I want to give you a REAL hug right now. To just hold your hand, make you some tea and tuck you in. We all wish we were there for you now, in person.
But, as BBA said, know you are loved, and we are with you in spirit.
I am so sorry about your baby Annie. I know it's been a tough road with her for a while now, and how much you loved her. This must be tough on S15, too, having to be away for this now.
And, I cannot even begin to say how much I want to hold your hand about the whole marriage thing, today. Peggy, this is a world of hurt, and as F1 said, these are real emotions, don't feel bad about feeling them. We are feeling them for you. It doesn't matter that you've been through this for 2 years, that you're divorced, it still hurts.
I'm sorry you had to send your baby S15 to that, and I can feel your sense of betrayal by your friends. You know they are aching now, too, but you are human to feel that you wish they had just said "no" - that SOMEONE finally said "no" to your XH.
I know it feels like you're alone. Like you don't know what ever was so wrong in your M that was worth walking away from, and how he is so suddenly committed now. I know it's hard to see a brighter day now.
But, I will share what a friend told me last night, one that had been through an awful D. She said "you know, you never know what is right around the corner, when you're clinging to something for dear life that is not good for you. It turns out it's exactly what you wanted and were looking for, and better than anything you could have imagined."
Tonight, feel your emotions. But, know that in the meantime, all of us here will be looking forward to that light of hope for you.
