I am very up and down right now. I really need to work on detatching. Funny you should use the codependent word because I was told I am VERY Codependent by my last therapist. I am up and down with his moods. I really need to figure out how to function without him.
I am finding that I am afraid to move on. I am afraid to find a job and be happy because I am scared I will be ok not wanting him. I am scared I will move on and I will be ok without him. Do I sound insane? Part of me is petrified that I can exist without him and I don't want to....
M 32 H 39 SS 15, SD 12, S11, S9, D7, D6, D4 E/A 02/06 WAS 03/06 RH 05/06 On 07/07 told me he wants to leave again. On 08/11/07 Walked out again.
People say "When God closes a door he opens a window." They forget to tell you "It is hell in the hallway!"
So my very immediate problem is my mother HATES my husband and wont even begin to forgive him or even see his side of things. She has now taken all of our family photos out of her house. This hurts me to the core and makes me SO mad at her. I just want to pack up my kids and move. Of course I cant but I am just so flippin upset with her right now.
I know that he has done a lot wrong but with her negative attitude and unforgiving heart how in the world am I to mend this and get my kids to understand he isnt all bad?
Help
M 32 H 39 SS 15, SD 12, S11, S9, D7, D6, D4 E/A 02/06 WAS 03/06 RH 05/06 On 07/07 told me he wants to leave again. On 08/11/07 Walked out again.
People say "When God closes a door he opens a window." They forget to tell you "It is hell in the hallway!"
I am finding that I am afraid to move on. I am afraid to find a job and be happy because I am scared I will be ok not wanting him. I am scared I will move on and I will be ok without him. Do I sound insane? Part of me is petrified that I can exist without him and I don't want to....
Amy, this is the same fear you were talking about over a week ago (page 3). A week isn't very much time and it's a big fear that I understand but what are you doing to deal with it? It's good to get these things out in the open and to be able to talk in a friendly enviornment. Eventually, you're gonna want to do something more than talk about it though, you're going to want to make it stop. So, are you ready for it to stop yet?
In answer to your questions. I am ready. I think the straw that broke the camels back happened tonight. I honestly have to move on. He is sick and I can't live on his coat tails anymore.
Tomorrow I am going to do my best to apply for jobs and go from there. One day at a time I guess.
M 32 H 39 SS 15, SD 12, S11, S9, D7, D6, D4 E/A 02/06 WAS 03/06 RH 05/06 On 07/07 told me he wants to leave again. On 08/11/07 Walked out again.
People say "When God closes a door he opens a window." They forget to tell you "It is hell in the hallway!"
He is so distraught and suicidal right now. I don't know what to do. He says he loves me but I don't know. He says he wants to come here but he is torn. Is this a game because he is now freaked out down there with her? What do I do? Is it time to just go dark and let go? Should I just divorce him? I love him and I could even get past this and love this baby but I can't ride this roller coaster. What do I do?? Has anyone been here? Does anyone know what I should do? I am litterally spinning out of control.
M 32 H 39 SS 15, SD 12, S11, S9, D7, D6, D4 E/A 02/06 WAS 03/06 RH 05/06 On 07/07 told me he wants to leave again. On 08/11/07 Walked out again.
People say "When God closes a door he opens a window." They forget to tell you "It is hell in the hallway!"
Bad night.. can't sleep. I don't know what to do. I am just so lost. I feel like I am just going to crumble. I just wish I knew what was right. I mean at this point if she is pregnant do I just walk away? Do I have a right to fight for a man that has a baby on the way? Is that fair to her? I am just falling apart.
M 32 H 39 SS 15, SD 12, S11, S9, D7, D6, D4 E/A 02/06 WAS 03/06 RH 05/06 On 07/07 told me he wants to leave again. On 08/11/07 Walked out again.
People say "When God closes a door he opens a window." They forget to tell you "It is hell in the hallway!"
I guess you need to figure out what you want. I don't think there's anything "right" for you to do. If you still love him and want to be with, keep that goal in mind. If not, don't. It's up to you, there are no right or wrong answers.
I think you should maintain your distance right now. He's got a lot of things to work through and he's going to want to run away from that work. Don't let him.
Well, I think the hands off approach is what it will have to be. I guess I have no choice. He sliced his wrist 7 times last night. I think I have to just let go and let God. He is very sick and I am in danger if I pursue him right now.
M 32 H 39 SS 15, SD 12, S11, S9, D7, D6, D4 E/A 02/06 WAS 03/06 RH 05/06 On 07/07 told me he wants to leave again. On 08/11/07 Walked out again.
People say "When God closes a door he opens a window." They forget to tell you "It is hell in the hallway!"
