Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Page 4 of 8 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8
Joined: Mar 2008
Posts: 9,309
Likes: 283
R
Member
Offline
Member
R
Joined: Mar 2008
Posts: 9,309
Likes: 283
Google: "24 Rules Of Seduction", read the book. I took the most notes from this one book during my divorce. It is a must read for all here.


"What is best for my kids is best for me"
Amor Fati
Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712
Joined: May 2018
Posts: 2,681
Likes: 2
O
Member
Offline
Member
O
Joined: May 2018
Posts: 2,681
Likes: 2
Originally Posted by BL42
Originally Posted by Ready2Change
Ask her out to dinner. Do all the preplanning, just like a first date. "Are you free on Oct 15th around 7PM? I would love to have dinner with you at SoandSo restaurant."
Originally Posted by LH19
You will than accept nothing less than a meet up date.
Guys...they live 8hrs away from each other. They can't just agree to meet up at some wine bar tomorrow night.
BL, I don't see why they couldn't? 8 hours is 1/3 of day's travel.

I would travel much longer to have kids with the one I love. I'd march up the mountain and back down if I had to.


H 34
W 29
BD 3/12/18
Divorce Busted Spring 19

It is not things that bother us, but the stories we tell ourselves about things.
Joined: Jul 2020
Posts: 1,760
Likes: 193
B
Member
Offline
Member
B
Joined: Jul 2020
Posts: 1,760
Likes: 193
ovrrnbw,
Originally Posted by ovrrnbw
I would travel much longer to have kids with the one I love. I'd march up the mountain and back down if I had to.
Guess it depends whether the one you love is at the top of the mountain smiling with open arms or frowning ready to push you back down. Seems like rarely outside of Hollywood do grand gestures work once an emotional decision is made, but hey...I'd be happy to admit I was wrong if it does.

Last edited by BL42; 10/04/22 11:11 PM.

Me:39 Ex-W:37
M:7 T: 9
S:6 D:3
BD/IHS/Confirm EA/PA: Feb '20
OM1 affair ends: May '20
W/OM2 & moves out: June-July '20
W files for D: Jul20
OM2 confirmed: 9/2020
Divorced: May '21
Joined: May 2018
Posts: 2,681
Likes: 2
O
Member
Offline
Member
O
Joined: May 2018
Posts: 2,681
Likes: 2
Well I agree normally but this is seduction and attraction not necessarily DB.

She probably doesn't know how serious he is either.


H 34
W 29
BD 3/12/18
Divorce Busted Spring 19

It is not things that bother us, but the stories we tell ourselves about things.
Joined: May 2018
Posts: 2,681
Likes: 2
O
Member
Offline
Member
O
Joined: May 2018
Posts: 2,681
Likes: 2
Well I agree normally but this is seduction and attraction not necessarily DB.

She probably doesn't know how serious he is either.


H 34
W 29
BD 3/12/18
Divorce Busted Spring 19

It is not things that bother us, but the stories we tell ourselves about things.
Joined: Feb 2018
Posts: 9,822
Likes: 226
S
Member
Offline
Member
S
Joined: Feb 2018
Posts: 9,822
Likes: 226
Tarheel, good luck man. I have no advice for you since I do not believe you are being true to yourself. LH used to have a quote about not chasing people. Live the life you want and the people worthy of you will come and stay I your life. My fear is that you are compromising what you want, and if you were to win her back and start a family in a few years you'd be miserable because you settled for something you didn't want.

So i know you just wanted advice on getting her back. I'll let the experts in that area take over. But I think you already know the answers there.

Peace to you! I truly hope you find the happiness you seek.


M(53), W(54),D(19)
M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017
Ring and Piecing since March 2018
Joined: Jun 2019
Posts: 4,627
Likes: 71
T
Member
Offline
Member
T
Joined: Jun 2019
Posts: 4,627
Likes: 71
Originally Posted by Tarheel
I guess my ideal scenario would be if she responds to my text about the parade and we can maintain some level of communication up until her bday (19th)
Originally Posted by kml, woman on this thread
Don’t be silent. Woo her. What could you do now in ACTIONS, not words, to make it clear to her you’re sincere?
Originally Posted by BL42
Imo, she'll either join the dating pool and find someone and be happy, or get frustrated with it and get back in touch with you...
Originally Posted by Ready2Change
Google: "24 Rules Of Seduction", read the book.
Originally Posted by overrnbw
Well I agree normally but this is seduction and attraction not necessarily DB.
Tarheel, I was the first to say to woo her. I hope you're doing something active this weekend to take your shot. If you wait for it, wait for it.. by the 19th new guy won't be so new. That's two weekends away and about four more rolls in the hay. Good women are worth fighting for. I've "won" women from other guys, and won second chances with ex's--in this case you have a huge leg up if you don't hesitate. Don't be passive, silent. Be the guy she freely chooses because he's best for her. Not the guy she falls back on because nobody else was interested enough.

>>> TAKE ACTION! <<<

Steve raises a good point--do be sure this is what you want. The more certain you are you want kids, the easier it will be to find actions to convince her this isn't just you feeling lonely.

Joined: Feb 2017
Posts: 9,227
Likes: 309
L
Member
Offline
Member
L
Joined: Feb 2017
Posts: 9,227
Likes: 309
Originally Posted by Traveler
Originally Posted by Tarheel
I guess my ideal scenario would be if she responds to my text about the parade and we can maintain some level of communication up until her bday (19th)
Originally Posted by kml, woman on this thread
Don’t be silent. Woo her. What could you do now in ACTIONS, not words, to make it clear to her you’re sincere?
Originally Posted by BL42
Imo, she'll either join the dating pool and find someone and be happy, or get frustrated with it and get back in touch with you...
Originally Posted by Ready2Change
Google: "24 Rules Of Seduction", read the book.
Originally Posted by overrnbw
Well I agree normally but this is seduction and attraction not necessarily DB.
Tarheel, I was the first to say to woo her. I hope you're doing something active this weekend to take your shot. If you wait for it, wait for it.. by the 19th new guy won't be so new. That's two weekends away and about four more rolls in the hay. Good women are worth fighting for. I've "won" women from other guys, and won second chances with ex's--in this case you have a huge leg up if you don't hesitate. Don't be passive, silent. Be the guy she freely chooses because he's best for her. Not the guy she falls back on because nobody else was interested enough.

>>> TAKE ACTION! <<<

Steve raises a good point--do be sure this is what you want. The more certain you are you want kids, the easier it will be to find actions to convince her this isn't just you feeling lonely.
Get a boombox and go to her to her window and paly "Baby Comeback" by the band Player. Works in the movies.

Joined: Mar 2008
Posts: 9,309
Likes: 283
R
Member
Offline
Member
R
Joined: Mar 2008
Posts: 9,309
Likes: 283
Originally Posted by Ready2Change
... read the book. ...
Did you finish all 467 pages...lol


"What is best for my kids is best for me"
Amor Fati
Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712
Joined: Jan 2014
Posts: 536
T
Tarheel Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
T
Joined: Jan 2014
Posts: 536
Text ex F last night wishing her good luck with the Homecoming parade she organizes and telling her to let me know how it went. Still no response. So she's either going no contact on me or trying to figure things out. Not sure what my next move is. Probably text again sometime in the next day or 2. Need to figure out what to say.

Talked with 3 good friends yesterday. They were all in agreement that I should go all out.



Page 4 of 8 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8

Moderated by  Cadet, DnJ, job, Michele Weiner-Davis 

Link Copied to Clipboard