Read a very sweet/sad story in the Wash Post the other day.
Young couple meet in college (she's a freshman, he's a senior) and fall in love. Chicago in the early 70's. She's white, he's black, her family is racist. So they secretly date for 7 years. She becomes a nurse and is working in a northern suburb of Chicago, on graveyard shifts. He's in grad school on the south side of Chicago. One day, overwhelmed with the stress of her job and their conflicting schedules and just not seeing a way forward, she breaks up with him and they don't speak afterwards.
Later they both marry, divorce, no kids. She looks for him online but it's like he doesn't exist. Finally she finds an address for his niece and writes to her - she reports that he's in a nursing home. She writes him there but no reply. She calls the nursing home but they can't tell her anything. She takes a red-eye flight from Oregon and goes to the nursing home, where she finds out he hasn't had a visitor in ten years, that he's had two strokes and one lower leg amputation. They wheel him out to see her and he remembers her instantly.
Long story short - she eventually moves him into her home and is caring for him. They still love each other. He says it's like heaven. Very sweet.
We had our video appointment with the folks at Palliative Care today. The doc had some helpful ideas about pain management - switching CMM from ER morphine to fentanyl patches which should reduce his myoclonus. Myoclonus has been the limiting factor in his narcotic use since he fell due to myoclonic jerks in his legs and knocked himself out last year. This should enable him to take a higher total dose of narcotics if needed. He's also prescribing an anti-depressant that helps with sleep as well. He also reassured CMM that hospice will not let him suffer at the end, that they can even give him IV sedatives at the end if needed.
The social worker was great with him and is also hooking him up with some counseling. Hospice will come next week for an initial visit.
We had our video appointment with the folks at Palliative Care today. The doc had some helpful ideas about pain management - switching CMM from ER morphine to fentanyl patches which should reduce his myoclonus. Myoclonus has been the limiting factor in his narcotic use since he fell due to myoclonic jerks in his legs and knocked himself out last year. This should enable him to take a higher total dose of narcotics if needed. He's also prescribing an anti-depressant that helps with sleep as well. He also reassured CMM that hospice will not let him suffer at the end, that they can even give him IV sedatives at the end if needed.
The social worker was great with him and is also hooking him up with some counseling. Hospice will come next week for an initial visit.
probably won't know til you talk to hospice but mom gets massage/reiki, clergy visits, and music therapy with she absolutely loves.
M 20+ T25+ S ~15.5 (BD) BD 4/6/15 D 12/23/16
"Someone I loved once gave me A box full of darkness. It took me years to understand, That this too, was a gift." ~ Mary Oliver
We had a nice visit from my good friends today. They are a married couple, married 46 years now! I’ve known them probably 43 years. He had a heart transplant 3 years ago.
CMM cooked and I manned the grill to cook the delicious steaks he carefully prepared (he has recently taught me how to cook them exactly the way he does). We laughed and told stories, drank wine and sat outside in a beautiful day. (The wife is wickedly allergic to cats, and my son has a cat, so visiting outdoors is best.)
It was a lovely day Nice I think for CMM to entertain and feel like he was just having a normal day, not impacted by cancer.
Initial visit from hospice planned today. Mostly just to establish care, not really anything we need from them right away.
The sleeping pill/antidepressant prescribed by palliative care (mirtazapine) has been a bust - actually disturbs his sleep. We will pick up his fentanyl patches this weekend and hopefully better pain control with those may help his sleep.
Also getting a second quote on replacing my furnace/ac - first quote was $13,000! Need to get it started soon though as the weather here will turn chilly soon and CMM doesn’t have any body fat on him.
Can’t take time off work right now (especially with the new furnace to pay for!) but really feel I could use a couple weeks to catch up on everything. Will have 5 days off at Thanksgiving and we close the office for the week between Xmas and New Years so am looking forward to those.
Well, up and at ‘em. Listening to a conference on autoimmune diseases while I work. Multitaskers Are Us.
Actually the second quote was higher (remember this is furnace and AC) but this guy seemed to have a plan that doesn’t require tearing out my side gate - I like that! The first quote uses Goodman furnace, second Daikin - both come from the same manufacturer, Daikin is higher priced but comes with a better warranty. We have a third quote coming in Monday.
I took a couple of boxes of stuff to Goodwill this morning, have a couple more to drop off tomorrow. Threw out a big bag of trash and combined three Rubbermaid bins of Xmas decorations into two. (No, that’s not all - plenty more where that came from ).
Still a lot to do out there but it’s looking better already.
wow. i wish i had your get up and go. I went through a few things at Mom's and ended up coming home and going to bed for a bit. Today is Dad's birthday. I think I will not be doing any clearing out today.
i spent yesterday afternoon guarding an immature redtail hawk who wasn't able to fly. called the environmental police, but had to wait for him to get to us. Helped distract her while he got her cornered so he could capture her. Thankfully, I know of a raptor rehabber, so had already set up a place for her to be taken to if we were lucky enough to grab her. Her left shoulder is drooping and may have a broken bone, unfortunately if it's the one the rehabber thinks it is, she may not be able to fly again. Time well spent even though it was about 3 hours.
going to paint at Mom's today.
M 20+ T25+ S ~15.5 (BD) BD 4/6/15 D 12/23/16
"Someone I loved once gave me A box full of darkness. It took me years to understand, That this too, was a gift." ~ Mary Oliver
