What fabulous news and what a great home for this fellow. I hope the two of you have much fun together. My male cat will also bite out of affection, it is very irritating and can be painful at times. But he is such a sweet boy.
I have a good feeling about this. A neutered, declawed middle aged male cat is probably a good fit - we match
Hahahahahaha!!!!!
Do you know if he's ever been around other cats or dogs?
According to the shelter it was just him and his owner in a big house and that he's not experienced other critters before ending up in the shelter. Once he gets settled in here I hope he'll be open to others coming in to "his" space but it will need to be his first. He found a basket on a shelf that is tucked waaay back on a shelf in the downstairs bath and hasn't moved from it. I'd not intended for it to be his spot but it is for the present. I believe the basket was empty but am not going to move him to find out.
He was still in there this morning but there was some sign that he nibbled on his food when I gave him fresh water. Nothing in the litter box. I went through the bathroom a couple of times and gave him a little pet. He seems chill but is in a "I'm.Fine.Right.Where.I.Am Thank.You.Very.Much" sort of mood I would imagine. He can roam around the bathroom and kitchen if he chooses now but I have the rest of the house closed off for probably the next couple of days.
He's going to love it when the windows can be opened and he can get fresh breezes. There are some big south-facing windows too and when S finally gets the last of her stuff out of the front porch it's a great cat place.
Originally Posted by CWarrior
Hey Andrew, sorry to hear about the sleeping problems. It sounds like mistakes in your line of work are costly. Not as costly as an air traffic controller erroneously saying the runway is free, but still very costly. You have an impressive work ethic if you're up at 2:00, 3:00, and 5:30 double-checking things. Your boss made a choice to hire someone who is not a veteran at this, and a choice not to pay for a night shift, yes? I hope you can cut yourself a bit of slack and realize your best sounds like it's better than 95%+ of the non-veterans he could've chosen for this role. What I wouldn't give to have more people on my team (without doubling the pay) as driven to succeed as you are!
I do have to work on boundaries. I was awake last night again at 2:00 and told myself that there was no difference between seeing an issue then or at 6:00. Yes - mistakes that I make can be costly but fortunately there's enough layers between me and product handling that few of them could impact safety. There have been some though and I've been clear on telling the guys that if I ask you to do something that is not up to our safety standards - even if you think it will be ok - tell me I'm an idiot and we'll plan something different.
The biggest challenge is that we seem to spend a lot of time "down in the weeds" worrying about each and every detail. We don't have the management systems (I'm talking process, not technology) that allows us to have clear paths. And we're too busy to figure those out even though I know that senior management really wants that and that's one of the reasons they brought me in to this role as my past experience with systems and process certainly apply and my background with this division in another role plus my over-all chemical industry background is a combination that few others would have. And certainly not in a person who is fine switching between filing paperwork and talking to drivers to working on strategic plans. Right now though I'm just plain burned out and exhausted. And now that we're down one more guy indefinitely we are "all" feeling it.
On BD H52, W50 T27, M26 S21, D23 BD-9-Mar-16 D-15-Jan-18 Final-19-Apr-18 I am a storyteller. The story may do you no good. But a story is never for the listener. It is always for the one who tells
If and when S and her crew comes to get the rest of her stuff, please make sure she doesn't take Monty or let him outside. You may want to be there when they come just to make sure he is safe in his little corner of the world. I'm glad he had a good night and feels safe in the basket. In a week or so, he'll be exploring more and more. I imagine the shelter was a shock to the poor little guy since he had lived in a large home w/no other pets but his fur baby parent.
I do hope that things will settle down on the job front. Sounds like you are spending way too much of your personal time dealing with work.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Congratulations. Sounds like a match made in heaven. Agree with Job - keep S and her crew well away from Monty. Refresh my memory - does she have access to the house without you being there? I don't think she'd take Monty but I also don't think any of that crew is woke enough to make sure he doesn't get out. I suggest putting all her stuff on the porch and denying her access to the house, if that's possible, as well as making sure Monty is in his bathroom with the door closed and locked so no one but you can get in.
M 20+ T25+ S ~15.5 (BD) BD 4/6/15 D 12/23/16
"Someone I loved once gave me A box full of darkness. It took me years to understand, That this too, was a gift." ~ Mary Oliver
when S finally gets the last of her stuff out of the front porch it's a great cat place.
You have a catio!!! They are all the rage!
If this cat was not even used to other people or animals it may take him a while to warm up to you. An isolated elderly person may have meant he had little contact with others besides the owner. And if the owner was a woman, he may have had no contact to speak of with men.
I'm not a big fan of giving animals treats but you might want to have a bag of cat treats on hand to "reward" him for any moves he makes your way.
Congratulations. Sounds like a match made in heaven. Agree with Job - keep S and her crew well away from Monty. Refresh my memory - does she have access to the house without you being there? I don't think she'd take Monty but I also don't think any of that crew is woke enough to make sure he doesn't get out. I suggest putting all her stuff on the porch and denying her access to the house, if that's possible, as well as making sure Monty is in his bathroom with the door closed and locked so no one but you can get in.
S gave me back her key when she moved her son out and I've moved where the spare one is kept. All of her stuff is either in the front porch or cellar both of which would be reasonably accessed without going through the house at all.
I've made an appointment for Monty to see my usual vet in a couple of weeks and get a microchip. I'm going to see later how he is about wearing a collar too as that's a sure sign that a random cat has a house to go to.
Originally Posted by kml
You have a catio!!! They are all the rage!
Well - not quite but it's a big sunny space and if I put something out there he can watch out the window through a screened window when the weather gets nicer. "The girls" would just lay in the big patches of sunshine and enjoy the fresh breezes.
Originally Posted by kml
I'm not a big fan of giving animals treats but you might want to have a bag of cat treats on hand to "reward" him for any moves he makes your way.
He came with 2 unopened bags. I may pull a treat out later and set it close to him. When I checked on him at lunch he'd used the litter box and was hiding behind it when I went in. So progress of a sort. What's that DB rule about no chasing?
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I've not heard from S in quite a while - I expect that I'll get a text out of the blue in the next few weeks that they are coming with a truck. It's amazing how many "little" things are missing - I'm sure because the people emptying the house of "her" stuff just plain didn't care and were frankly over-tired of literally cleaning up her messes. I was looking the other day for the stack of microfibre cloths that I had in the kitchen for cleaning my glasses - they accumulate. None. Galls me a bit on how so much random and less random stuff was taken. Just perhaps also shows me the sense of entitlement she has that was a big part of the problem. Someone who sleeps until mid-afternoon and expects someone else to take care of her kids, the house and pay the bills really doesn't match the person who angrily told me that she was upset because I wasn't letting her more into my life because she wanted to help me and stop me from doing so much some months previously. In her mind though, I'm sure there's no disconnect. I expect I'm a selfish jerk who wouldn't let her do anything or change anything.
One thing that I certainly recognized and more so as time goes on was that her actions were all destructive and not constructive. She cross-stitches so I'd suggested she do something decorative for the bedroom - she got angry at that. She demanded that I remove all the books from the bathroom (did that) and cut off the shaker pegs I put in to hang towels off of (didn't do that). She has dozens and dozens of pictures but never put any up and got upset when I did. She tore some of the wallpaper off in one room with no plan on how the room would be redecorated. She was upset that I loved having my quilt - that I bought for myself post divorce - on the bed and insisted that her's be used. Except that the one cheap comforter she had was covered in blood spots from her dog and she never made any moves to put it on the bed anyway. So much negativity in her post-cohabitation actions that don't at all match her words nor even her actions when we were dating.
It's odd perhaps how that relationship has scarred me so badly in many ways. Emotionally I'm fine - probably because it was me that pulled the plug. These days I'm not even too worried about the boys because one was rather an entitled jerk and the other has I am sure more or less landed on his feet. S herself is probably fine other than some steaming resentment towards me - especially if what her son said is true about me being the first to dump her - something I don't completely believe.
But it's made me pretty unwilling to put myself "out there" and to risk again what I have constructed. Imagining what someone could add to my life that I actually want or need is getting tougher and tougher.
On BD H52, W50 T27, M26 S21, D23 BD-9-Mar-16 D-15-Jan-18 Final-19-Apr-18 I am a storyteller. The story may do you no good. But a story is never for the listener. It is always for the one who tells
Like I've said before - when the time comes, look for someone who is content in their own life and just available for weekend dates without actually moving in with you! Best of both worlds I now think.
But you still have some healing to do and need time to get everything settled in your house and life first. All in good time.
Congrats on the new family member. He looks like a handsome boy who will warm up to you eventually. I just read somewhere recently that newly-adopted animals can take weeks to adjust to the new surroundings and new routines. Be patient. I think treats are a good thing.
As far as S, dating, romance, etc:I think you still need time to heal and as bttrfly has said several times "date yourself". Get back into your routine of those things YOU like to do like walks in the neighborhood or parks, reading, flea marketing (if you are able to do that safely). There is a ton of opportunity to work on hobbies, fitness, yourself in general right now while you can take the time to focus on you and not worry about shorting someone else of your attention. You and Monty ARE the attention right now, so use that to your advantage and take care of you for a little while.
Me 52, H53 Bomb drop 9/29/2014 Divorce from XH final 12/17/2014 Marriage #2 12/31/2019 5 adult (step)daughters (3 from XH's first marriage, 2 from current H's previous relationships) 6 grandkids
Happy spring! It's a lovely sunny day here in Upper Lower Middle Kanukistan. Just a hair below freezing right now but it should be warmer reliably going forward. Much of the snow is now gone and the grass is starting to green. I need to go out to the back yard and check on my rhubarb - it should be starting to poke it's nose out of the ground. I was very surprised that my son-in-law from Georgia had never had it before and not even really heard of it. Must be a more northerly thing. Lots of good nutrition in it although the leaves are poisonous - easy to avoid. I did find out though that the "poison" in the leaves is oxalic acid - which is used as a stain remover in both laundry and dish detergents.
I went out Friday afternoon and picked up some of this year's maple syrup for myself and the kids. I also picked up some maple sugar which will be nice in my pancakes and I'm sure my son-in-law will like it as a treat in his coffee. I'm having brunch with my son tomorrow so will take his over. I shudder to think how much this will cost me to mail to Seattle. I'm picking up some treats for my daughter and husband when I grocery shop today to fill out a box. I did finally get the birthday card she mailed me yesterday as well. She mailed it on the 5th so the postal services are slooow these days.
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Man-o-man what a week. Earlier this week one of my co-workers announced that he was taking a sudden leave of absence. I suspect that's medical related and will probably be at least a month. Not sure if it's his own health or a family member. I was chatting with a mutual acquaintance and his opinion was that this colleague may take this opportunity to find a new, less stressful position.
It does mean that his work for the next while at least will need to be absorbed by the rest of us. And the "rest of us" is a pretty small number. As I type this, I'm also starting up the program on my computer that checks yesterday's production numbers and shipments. There's 3 rail-cars to load, some product that needs to be taken from a particular tank that I thought would load last night that's open and 4 other loads that need to be timed by the plant as the product is made.
We did have a few things that went sideways yesterday. I made a mistake in rail-car placement and called some cars in for this coming Monday instead of yesterday. No big problem - we'll pay a bit extra for them to sit where they are and I'll need to work on Sunday and Monday to figure out if they can keep coming in where I had asked them or if I need to ask the railway to change the plans. I was just going to store them in our siding anyway and load them next week. But I'm annoyed that I missed it. We had another car come in Friday morning that we are to empty into trucks for a customer. From Arkansas The hatch was improperly fastened down and while the seals were in place, they were improperly placed. When we got the hatch open there was labeling inside that indicated that the car was filled with the wrong product and we couldn't get in touch with anyone that early in the morning (we were to start unloading at 8:00). Keep in mind that pretty much everything we deal with is a clear odourless liquid. I remember a few months ago one of the guys having a panic when he saw fluid under a container which - after lab testing - turned out to be melted snow. So - we had to pull a sample, take it to our lab and try to figure out what it was. Turned out to be the correct product. It reacted properly to certain other chemicals and had the correct specific gravity. This is why some customers have us put a few drops of dye into some of the products we package - usually a red dye.
But - we're all getting very very burned out. Our two remaining admin people are in their mid-60s and could walk at any time. We're all working extra long hours. We need more people. I can understand the president's reluctance to bring people in as we are supposed to be transitioning computer systems but this can't go on.
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Monty is doing well I think. This morning I think he's suffering a bit of trauma and regret. He's been staying hidden in his basket on a shelf in the bathroom but has roamed around the kitchen at night. Cat hairs on the kitchen faucet were a give-away. Last night after my zoom happy hour I popped my head into the bathroom to say good-night and he had just left the litter box and was crouching scared. So I sat down and called him over. He was tentative but then devolved into an ecstasy of purring, rubbing and rolling around. We had a nice cuddle. Even though I wanted to go to bed, I went into the living room leaving the door open and watched some TV (old Muppet Show) thinking he may want to visit. This is the first time that the rest of the house has been open so he slinked by and vanished. After 15 minutes or so I figure he's doing his own thing and find him eventually in the office - in a bit of a panic and stressed out and he quickly retreats back to the bathroom. I left the house open and this morning found him in his basket again, looking at me suspiciously. He did though drink most of his water and ate most of the food and the litter box had been used again. When I had him on my lap earlier I checked and his skin was pliable and showed no sign of dehydration - the biggest thing I was worried about.
So - he perhaps has regrets about his wanton behaviour. It does seem though that he will be an affectionate companion. I'll keep giving him space and time.
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Busy weekend planned. The usual cleaning and stuff. I need to find the bottom of my inbox. There's a few things that I'd been hanging on to that I'm just going to have to let slide. I did get an automated email from the bank that S's loan payment had been processed - she's not adjusted that yet - no huge surprise. I sent her a picture of the notification with a note suggesting that her attempts to change the payment haven't worked out as of yet. What a learning experience. There are other words that could be used too. I really "did" know that she wasn't very reliable early on but kept making excuses for her and covering for her. Even now, I expected her to not have her act together and made sure that the loan would be covered. I did this for my ex-wife "all" the time too. I suspect that many of us here were the ones that made sure that the world kept turning. Or - at least that's my own perspective on the history.
When I was having dinner last night I noticed someone wandering around the back-yard of the abandoned house next door so I put on my boots and mask and wandered out. "Can I help you with anything" seemed a non-confrontational greeting. I did vaguely recognize the guy and yes, he does live in the village and had been asked if he wanted the shed that was on the property. We chatted for a bit - he knew my ex-wife as someone who worked at the village general store but not the story. He thought that we had moved. I gave him the basics - he was a bit shocked. I also mentioned in passing that there were security cameras pointed at the house. After I texted my neighbour to confirm that it was a legit visitor and it was. Hopefully something soon will be done with that property. There is a huge demand at present for properties up here. A house around the corner - which has been nicely renovated by a contractor - is up for sale for about $400K - about 3 times what I bought my ex out of this place for. I just had a look at the local real estate map and it is at the low end of the market now. Scary stuff.
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On a final Monty related note, when I was feeding him, I noticed that the bottom of the bag had a sticker on it that identified his birthday and former owner and address. He lived around the corner from my son. My first instinct was to contact my vet to let them know that I had a good line on his former vet. 2nd was to contact the shelter to suggest to them that they need to be more careful with people's personal information. My choice is to just keep quiet about it. It's nice to know his birthday (August) He had been eating a special hypoallergenic diet so I need to find that. From the address I now know that while he did live in a big house, he lived in an apartment in it so a place this big and empty is undoubtedly very intimidating to him which explains in part why after a scouting mission around the house he's retreated to his basket on the shelf (I put a blanket in it). Undoubtedly intimidating.
Well - time to get moving - lots to do today.
On BD H52, W50 T27, M26 S21, D23 BD-9-Mar-16 D-15-Jan-18 Final-19-Apr-18 I am a storyteller. The story may do you no good. But a story is never for the listener. It is always for the one who tells
The hatch was improperly fastened down and while the seals were in place, they were improperly placed. When we got the hatch open there was labeling inside that indicated that the car was filled with the wrong product and we couldn't get in touch with anyone that early in the morning (we were to start unloading at 8:00). Keep in mind that pretty much everything we deal with is a clear odourless liquid. I remember a few months ago one of the guys having a panic when he saw fluid under a container which - after lab testing - turned out to be melted snow. So - we had to pull a sample, take it to our lab and try to figure out what it was. Turned out to be the correct product. It reacted properly to certain other chemicals and had the correct specific gravity. This is why some customers have us put a few drops of dye into some of the products we package - usually a red dye.