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PLC Offline OP
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Nothing has changed with H, but after almost two years of this, I have had a mental awakening of sorts.

I (to my knowledge) have been GALing, I have an IHS and I have not done laundry or made meals with him in mind for a long time now. He is a roommate. I had a bad day on Sunday, and I don't know what was so different, since he is still the same MLC man. But anyway, that night I really prayed and I asked for help.

Later, I was reading through the posts here and found a response that Sandi had given to someone. Nothing new, after two years, we know what we are supposed to do, but at that moment, it was like a lightbulb moment. I realized some of the things that I have been hesitant to do around here and do FOR ME need to be done.

I went to bed in a peaceful mood.

Monday was a regular workday and not a lot of any interaction.

Today, I woke up and I feel amazing. I had my IC by the phone and when she asked how I was doing and I said "great" she even responded "really?" I can say, maybe there was a further dropping of a mental rope, but I feel good.

I have really been focusing on the length of this marathon, it is daunting. I think of the things I take care of here and I know he is a grown man, but i also know things like taxes, cooking, grocery shopping (for other than frozen snacks) he leaves to me. He has an expensive hobby that I would assume wanting a D, he would sell so he can buy somewhere to live, but he is doubling down by readying for the upcoming season.

H would have to move out of the country to be with OW2, he could, but he would more than likely need to sell the items to afford that change. I also think if OW was here, I might think differently.

Anyway, anyone out there that is struggling today, take a deep breath. You will be ok, I know I will.

PLC

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Wait - so he spends so much of marital funds on his hobby that it could fund a new home???? What do YOU spend money on?

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No, this has been accumulated over years. He had sponsors and if he sold, it would be to pay “us” back for bonuses he kept and then he could buy something small not in the area our house is in.

I am not a spender, per se, never had been. My spending plans are some things for the home and travel as soon as we are safe to do so.

I am actually pricing things and am making a list of things I want, and budgeting to do them.

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Last edited by job; 02/25/21 02:29 PM. Reason: added link to new thread

Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to.
The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
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