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A Message from Michele
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Re: What the AF??!!?? [Re: Ginger1] #2906278
10/20/20 06:57 PM
10/20/20 06:57 PM
Joined: Jun 2015
Posts: 3,897
Massachusetts
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bttrfly Offline
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Massachusetts
i'm so sorry G


M 20+ T25+
S 15.5 (BD)
BD 4/6/15
H moved out 4/24/15
D Final 12/23/16
When God gives you a new beginning don't repeat the same old mistakes. It's 2020, anything could happen; eat dessert first!!!!
Re: What the AF??!!?? [Re: Ginger1] #2906284
10/20/20 07:33 PM
10/20/20 07:33 PM
Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 2,624
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Dawn70 Offline
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Posts: 2,624
Man, that just sux, G. I'm so sorry everything just keeps piling on. (((G)))


Me 50, H52
Divorce from XH final 12/17/2014
Marriage #2 12/31/2019
5 adult (step)daughters (3 from XH's first marriage, 2 from current H's previous relationships)
4 grandkids (plus 2 on the way)
Re: What the AF??!!?? [Re: kml] #2906300
10/20/20 09:10 PM
10/20/20 09:10 PM
Joined: Jan 2000
Posts: 27,694
Southern Maryland
job Offline

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Posts: 27,694
Southern Maryland
Is there any way that he can be held accountable for the error, i.e., like he pay a portion of the money owed? After all, it was his oversight, not yours.


Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to.
The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Re: What the AF??!!?? [Re: Ginger1] #2906982
10/28/20 09:43 PM
10/28/20 09:43 PM
Joined: Feb 2015
Posts: 5,353
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Ginger1 Offline OP
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Ginger1  Offline OP
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Unfortunately he cannot be held accountable for the error. I just have to pay. It makes me very sad. My dad is going to pay ( ????) and he says I donít have to pay him back, but I will. I can repay to the IRS with interest which he wonít let me do. So I will repay him.

Otherwise..... Iíve been going to the gym, mostly donít drink unless Iím going out, although I am enjoying a beer right now because I had a really rough day. I am burnt out, but tomorrow is my last day until November 9th. I am, however, tasked on Friday to repainting my daughters room. Her dad lent me supplies. And I am
Secretly hoping he comes over and helps me, because he is off as well. Not counting on it though, lol. But I do appreciate the supplies.

I have to work on Christmas . For working they were going to give me Christmas Eve off. I then realized I have no one to spend Christmas even with, so I gave it up to those who have family. I had the idea of doing a ďChristmas number 2Ē with D13. Since I wonít get home until 4:30, I told her she could stay with her dad until the festivities are over and come back home. We will do Christmas night like Christmas Eve and The day after Christmas off like itís Christmas morning. She really liked the idea, and my dad and his wife are on board too. Gotta make the best of the situation.

Work is kicking my butt big time. Lots of people come to me for help and assistance. I am everyoneís go-to. I helped someone out today and it may have bit me in the butt, hopefully everything will be ok.

Next week D14 and I are having a 2 night girls getaway. It will involve mother daughter massages and seeing the Plymouth Rock and mayflower. Iím excited. Mexico was too risky. This should be fun. There is a pool too, and shaping and seafood restaurants ( for me of course) itís only a 4 hour drive, I can handle that.

Iím surviving. But I might be having caregiver burnout. Iím not sleeping well. I feel like I am there for everyone, helping, giving guidance. And I feel like no one is there for me and itís tough. This might be hard to believe, but people come to me for guidance and comfort . I might be a mess, but I can help others . And I like to help others.

I realize I am the backburner. But maybe this trip will help me out a little.

Thatís all for now

Re: What the AF??!!?? [Re: Ginger1] #2906986
10/28/20 10:11 PM
10/28/20 10:11 PM
Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 16,349
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kml Online
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It's not hard to believe at all G. And yes, even us tough strong women really want to have a shoulder to cry on sometimes. ((((Hug))))

Re: What the AF??!!?? [Re: Ginger1] #2907019
10/29/20 03:25 AM
10/29/20 03:25 AM
Joined: Oct 2018
Posts: 1,695
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DejaVu6 Offline
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You sound like you are a bit better G. Still canít get over the income tax error. That is just ridiculous to me. I think your Christmas plan sounds great. Awesome deal for D14...she gets two Christmases!!! Hopefully there will be a good vibe at work on the actual days so you feel better about being there. Your girlsí trip sounds like fun. Personally, I love driving so a four-hour drive sounds great to me. Hope it gives you the mental break you need to get through the next couple of months. (((HUGS)))


Me 51
H 46
B/G Twins 11
SD19
Legal SA - January 2019
Divorce filed - June 2019
Divorce final - November 2019

Together 14 years
Married 12 years
BD1 - May 2014
BD2 - September 14, 2018

Re: What the AF??!!?? [Re: Ginger1] #2907054
10/29/20 03:15 PM
10/29/20 03:15 PM
Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 2,624
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Dawn70 Offline
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Sorry about the accountant stuff (but glad your dad is helping) and that you have to work on Christmas, but I love your work-around to allow D13 to have 2 Christmases. These are most certainly memories that she will treasure for years to come. You are a fantastic mom!

Your girls' trip sounds awesome and like a much-needed break for both you and your D for some bonding and relaxing. How fun! I hope that you just relax and take full advantage. I can't wait to see some pictures. wink


Me 50, H52
Divorce from XH final 12/17/2014
Marriage #2 12/31/2019
5 adult (step)daughters (3 from XH's first marriage, 2 from current H's previous relationships)
4 grandkids (plus 2 on the way)
Re: What the AF??!!?? [Re: Ginger1] #2907947
11/09/20 01:17 AM
11/09/20 01:17 AM
Joined: Feb 2015
Posts: 5,353
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Ginger1 Offline OP
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Posts: 5,353
I donít know why, but Iím finding more difficult to post about myself. I am surviving . I had a nice trip with D13. It was good we got away together. Iím glad I was able to have that experience with her. Sheís still a really tough teen, but a good kid at heart and I think she still loves her mom. But some days, I could just cry. Actually, I do cry. But I have to keep perspective. She isnít getting into trouble, she gets straight aís. Sheís just lazy and disrespectful and argumentative at times. I donít usually let her get away with it, but some days I just donít have the fight.

I am not looking forward to going back to work tomorrow. In the one week I was gone we have had more responsibility added to our plates. I need to find the will to deal with these really difficult families again. It was nice not doing so.

I have to get foot surgery. I still can barely walk, so My doctor and I decided to get it over with. I should only be out of work a few days. Itís a simple procedure and I have a high tolerance for pain.

Iíve really let myself go lately. Physically and mentally. I donít look good. I gained too much weight, Iím not comfortable in my body, and I have not really cared. I only care when I see a photo of myself and I donít even recognize me. I gain weight a lot in my face and it distorts me. But what has been most upsetting is I just donít care anymore. I want to care again. I donít want to let myself go. I donít want to give up. I want to feel good about myself again. I want to look sexy again. I want to feel sexy again. I tried to convince myself I could be comfortable and sexy as I am now, but I really canít be. Itís just not ďmeĒ i canít put myself out there again feeling the way I do.

Tomorrow starts a new me. Getting my will power back. My motivation. My will to feel better and do better. I had lost it all. And thatís not good. I just want myself back again.

Re: What the AF??!!?? [Re: Ginger1] #2907955
11/09/20 02:27 AM
11/09/20 02:27 AM
Joined: Jun 2015
Posts: 3,897
Massachusetts
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bttrfly Offline
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Joined: Jun 2015
Posts: 3,897
Massachusetts
{{{{{hugs}}}}}


M 20+ T25+
S 15.5 (BD)
BD 4/6/15
H moved out 4/24/15
D Final 12/23/16
When God gives you a new beginning don't repeat the same old mistakes. It's 2020, anything could happen; eat dessert first!!!!
Re: What the AF??!!?? [Re: Ginger1] #2908123
11/10/20 02:10 PM
11/10/20 02:10 PM
Joined: Oct 2018
Posts: 1,695
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DejaVu6 Offline
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Itís strange how we stop caring about ourselves when it feels like the world has stopped caring about us. Just want to reassure you that that is not the case. Youíve taken some hits recently, no doubt, but there are still good things to focus on and I know you know what those things are. There are lots of people on here and IRL who care about you and are pulling for you to get through all of this stuff youíve had to deal with lately. We believe in you and have faith you will come out of this period stronger and better than before. Just keep moving forward G. There are better days ahead. (((HUGS)))


Me 51
H 46
B/G Twins 11
SD19
Legal SA - January 2019
Divorce filed - June 2019
Divorce final - November 2019

Together 14 years
Married 12 years
BD1 - May 2014
BD2 - September 14, 2018

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