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I don’t think it’s childish to want to be close to your family, especially at a time of a big transition.

Why would it be childish to want to be close to your family?

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Thanks for the help everyone.


"I will not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. I will face my fear. I will let it pass over me. When the fear has gone, there shall be nothing. Only I will remain."

Litany Against Fear, Dune
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Originally Posted by Ginger1
I don’t think it’s childish to want to be close to your family, especially at a time of a big transition.

Why would it be childish to want to be close to your family?


I thought that too.

Atlguy, that would be a good thing empathize with her. You'll still have to decide where you'll live and work and prepare for that.

Speaking of work, you haven't made any progress there it seems. Grab life by the horns and make it happen. That would be a 180 for you. Maybe it's not the job you want but it's the job you can get right now. Maybe it's a gig, maybe it's 3 jobs, I don't know. This 180 would really change how she views and values you.


H 34
W 29
BD 3/12/18
Divorce Busted Spring 19

It is not things that bother us, but the stories we tell ourselves about things.
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Ok, I’m sorry this logic is so difficult.

I’d also love to take my son back to my home several hours away too. But, I’m not a child that is still suckling on mommy and daddy’ teet. I decided to live here, marry here, have baby here, and that’s where we are. It’s a childish demand to make and I’m not talking about it anymore.

I have an OK income right now, like your sage advice says, not the kind i want, but it will work for now.

Please stop giving me unsolicited advice, thanks.


"I will not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. I will face my fear. I will let it pass over me. When the fear has gone, there shall be nothing. Only I will remain."

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I am going to take a break from the forums for a bit, guys. In short, I'm not doing well, and am mentally falling apart. I am seeking more aggressive mental therapy.

I'm losing it.

In short, I have a ghost of my W that is talking to lovingly to me like we used to be, and I'm starting to talk back. It's delusional, and delirium is taking over, but it feels so nice.

I'm shaking as I type this.


"I will not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. I will face my fear. I will let it pass over me. When the fear has gone, there shall be nothing. Only I will remain."

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ATLGuy13,

It's awful. Trust me, I KNOW. But you'll get through it. Hang in there. You're going to be alright. Hearing from people on this forum has really helped me so you might consider sticking with it.


Me:39 Ex-W:37
M:7 T: 9
S:6 D:3
BD/IHS/Confirm EA/PA: Feb '20
OM1 affair ends: May '20
W/OM2 & moves out: June-July '20
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I've been there too, ATL.

You are in fight or flight mode right now. Slow down and don't make any drastic decisions, this too shall pass.

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About a week before Christmas last year, probably my lowest points in life.
Just sat alone in MBR screaming at the top of my lungs for 10 minutes (house in the woods) then just burst out in uncontrollable tears for I don't know how long. That whole day is a total blur.
It was in the middle of the week and I had called in sick.

It is indescribably tough but you Will get through.
If you urgently need IC do it and leave the forums for a few days.
After I am positive these boards will help.

Last edited by Mumin; 09/08/20 02:38 PM.

Me: 34
Stbxw: 30
D:5 D:3
Mini bd: May/June 2019
Married: Aug 2019
BD: 6th Dec 2019
OM Confirmed: Feb 2020
March 2020: I filed for D
Waiting for D to be finalized and W to move out end of January 2021
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Take some time away from the Board. If you are receiving IC therapy, please continue to do so, in fact, you may want to ramp it up a bit to help you over this bump in the road.

One of things that concerns me is that posters think that they need to take in all of the advice that is given on the forums. You do not. In fact, take from the advice that which you can use in your situation and leave the rest in the corner. We all have been down the road you are walking on and we all know what you are going through. Again, take some time away from the Board and when you feel stronger and want to return, then do so...but remember, when you post, you open yourself up to "unsolicited advice". Try to remember, we all mean well and want to see you healthy, both physically, mentally and emotionally. No one means you harm in any way.


Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to.
The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
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Take care of yourself. Good luck.


H 34
W 29
BD 3/12/18
Divorce Busted Spring 19

It is not things that bother us, but the stories we tell ourselves about things.
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