WW post D (Thanks BenB part 4)

[LH19]

NC accept when it relates to the kids.

[Mumin]

Lol the timing of this given my recent post.
Just got a DM from W: "kids are wondering when you are coming home?"
I actually believe her, but will still wait at least an hour and probably answer a specific time due to bus schedules.

[Ginger1]

Why are you making your kids wait an hour to know when they will see their dad?

[Mumin]

Very good point and something I realized after.
It was like I reacted as if I didn't believe her and a month or two back I probably wouldn't have.
But I do believe her now. So I answered and she said they'll be happy.
She sent some pics of their weekend and I just said "summertime is great! :)"

Will bring up costs of house tonight.

[Mumin]

Update

Apparently she never went to the rental but she seems to understand that we have to come to some sort of an agreement. Which is good.
I said I still want to buy her share of the house. She said she doesn't want to loose out on market value.
I mentioned splitting assets. She said she didn't think that would be a problem since we're still friends. I didn't answer.

Then she started asking about a particular week during the vacation, if we could switch some days with the kids.
I said those particular days are hard to switch cuz I have rented a car and mentioned she has a long week off later.
She said well maybe I am looking at a trip. We never really ended the conversation and I didn't say no or yes to switching days.
It's obvious shes planning something with om. So I am definitely not keen to help her out now that we already agreed on particular dates during the summer.


Side note /journal
It still gets at me when I see how she's packing all her new sexy underwear for a couple of days with OM.
She has got several new summer outfits and she really is very very beautiful.
Focusing on me and the kids!

[ovrrnbw]

Mumin,

I'd recommend answering her at your convenience.

Here's a good line I read recently: "it is not things that trouble us, but our judgments about things".

You need to get out in the social scene, interact with women, and get your mojo back.

I was walking through a park 3 weeks back as the sun set and it hit me: I give myself my own juice. Sounds a littlle cocky but it's true. I tell myself this and I know that I can run my business, hit it hard in the gym, smile at women, read, write, play, laugh and do anything I want. Or do nothing and be happy about it. Forget about her and focus on your life.

[Mumin]

Mumin,

I'd recommend answering her at your convenience.

Here's a good line I read recently: "it is not things that trouble us, but our judgments about things".

You need to get out in the social scene, interact with women, and get your mojo back.

I was walking through a park 3 weeks back as the sun set and it hit me: I give myself my own juice. Sounds a littlle cocky but it's true. I tell myself this and I know that I can run my business, hit it hard in the gym, smile at women, read, write, play, laugh and do anything I want. Or do nothing and be happy about it. Forget about her and focus on your life.

This is so right! Today she gave the kids pasta for breakfast because everything else was out.
Perfectly timed for me to take the kids today so I have to do all the grocery shopping...

I have decided to get tinder after summer vacation. I want to focus on the kids during vacation and during the weeks I don't have kids I may as well practice my real life flirting skills.
Atm reading a book on parenting but will start the 3% mann during summer.

On the 2 days she wanted to switch I haven't answered yet and probably won't unless she brings it up again.
If she does I will say no to any days involving my rental.

[Vapo]

You are not ready for Tinder. No one told you to go and find hookups. You need to heal first. You are damaged and broken. And broken attracts brooken. You are no way near ready to date.

You should focus on yourself and the kids instead. Getting Tinder is just about the worst thing you can do for yourself. You are seeking external validation and external solution for your inner problems. It will not work.

There will be a hefty price to pay...

[ovrrnbw]

Is he damaged and broken? It sounds like he is moving forward through the process. He filed, he's not getting into arguments and carrying on with the WW, he's doing what's right for his family.

Practicing flirting is fine in my book. I haven't read it, but isn't The 3% Man about understanding women better so you can find the right woman for you?

Mumin, you mentioned nothing about hookups, is that just implied with Tinder?

I still think that there is a lot of good to take away from Vapo's post.

[Ginger1]

Practicing flirting on women who are online dating looking for something real healed from there stuff is not fine IMHO.

But I’m realizing people don’t share my opinion as evidenced by the men I am finding in the online dating world.