Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Page 9 of 11 1 2 7 8 9 10 11
Joined: Jan 2000
Posts: 28,297
Likes: 113
job Offline
Member
Offline
Member
Joined: Jan 2000
Posts: 28,297
Likes: 113
I agree w/bttrfly. When you keep your focus on the present, it's much better than trying to keep looking in the rear view mirror.

I am so sorry that you are stressed and working two jobs. The stress is nothing to play with and I do hope that you are finding things to help you destress when you arrive home.

I am very sorry about your aunt. It is always a difficult time when you know that a loved one is very close to passing away. I pray that she passes peacefully and all of you can find comfort in the memories that you created and shared with her over the years.


Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to.
The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Joined: Feb 2015
Posts: 6,826
Likes: 156
G
Ginger1 Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
G
Joined: Feb 2015
Posts: 6,826
Likes: 156
I appreciate the support and I’ve come back here to post a few times but can’t quite get myself to hit the send button.

I think my discomfort and sadness is about the present. Slightly rooted in what went wrong in the past, but I borrow nothing from the future anymore. In my present I am really tired of working my butt off. I’m just so tired. But I gotta do it.

My patio and concrete is fixed on stairs and looks so good . The ex was here dropping of D and he was the first to see it and thought it was awesome. He brought over his new virtual reality gaming system for me to try and it was so awesome. We hung out and played for a bit. I do know this drives his W a bit crazy. And sadly enough, I get joy out of that. I would never cross a line, I have no desire, but I like her squirming a bit.

I went on a date Sunday night. Nice guy, seemed to be a good dad. I thought it was good he was divorced for 5 years except when I found out he was also in a relationship ship since he was separated and they just broke up in April. No thank you. You don’t get fresh out of a 5 year R and be ready to date. And if you are, there is something wrong. And they broke up for a few months last year and he was online dating then. And he got back with her. I refuse to put myself in that position. He waNts to see me again. I do not want to see him again.

I know too much, and I’m much farther along in these processes than most. And I did the work. I can’t seem to come across someone in the same place as me. I’m not willing to be with someone just to have someone. And I need someone who is a bit evolved and has relationship ship skills and has dealt with their stuff. And it’s truly hard to come by. But until I do, I will not settle.

I’m good news, I messed up my work schedule and didn’t have to work yesterday and I got to surprise my dad and spend the day at the beach with him. He was so happy. So was I. D12 is going on a 4 day getaway with her dad and his wife. His wife needs to assure me it’s a “educational trip” because they go tour mansions. IDGAf if it’s educational. I lose some time with her, but I’m happy she has something. To do. My ex only has to work 2 weeks on and 2 weeks off and get paid full. Lucky ducky.

I’d be happy for a hair cut and a mani/pedi

Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 18,913
Likes: 316
K
kml Offline
Member
Offline
Member
K
Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 18,913
Likes: 316
Lol, yes, let his wife squirm a little bit, what the heck wink

Good job in recognizing the date was a bad bet. Yep, you see things more clearly than most once you go through the Divorcebusting Graduate Program in Relationship Psychology. When the right guy comes along you’re going to blow him away.

Joined: Jun 2015
Posts: 6,119
Likes: 408
B
Member
Offline
Member
B
Joined: Jun 2015
Posts: 6,119
Likes: 408
you are the prize and I'm glad you know it!!! xoxoxo love you G


M 20+ T25+
S ~15.5 (BD)
BD 4/6/15
D 12/23/16

"Someone I loved once gave me
A box full of darkness.
It took me years to understand,
That this too, was a gift."
~ Mary Oliver
Joined: Feb 2015
Posts: 1,902
F
Member
Offline
Member
F
Joined: Feb 2015
Posts: 1,902
Well stop not clicking the send button, it gets boring coming here with nothing to read!


Accept what is, let go of what was, and have faith in what will be
Joined: Feb 2015
Posts: 6,826
Likes: 156
G
Ginger1 Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
G
Joined: Feb 2015
Posts: 6,826
Likes: 156
I am officially done here. I can’t do this. People who endure rape to save their marriage. I am so sickened.

I’ve loved all the support here all this time, but it is just getting real bad here. People are coming with the worst absuive situations, willing to endure so ugh mental and now physical abuse. I just can’t anymore. This place got me back my dignity and I appreciate it more than you will ever know. Those were the good old days.

I just can’t even be tempted to come here and read that anymore

Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 18,913
Likes: 316
K
kml Offline
Member
Offline
Member
K
Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 18,913
Likes: 316
Why do you even go to Newcomer's anymore? Just stay here with your divorce support peeps.

I haven't been on Newcomer's in a long time - don't have the extra energy for it. I'll pop into MLC for a few people but otherwise here.

Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 2,265
Likes: 58
D
Member
Offline
Member
D
Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 2,265
Likes: 58
I was going to say the same. Populate your “followed threads” list with those you want to read and leave the rest alone. Don’t even bother with them.


DonH
Midwest
Me 56
WAW-EXW 55
Met 11/95 / Married 5/00
Bomb 6/20/05 / She Filed on 6/2/06 / Divorced on 10/9/06
4 who'd qualify as GF since D & dated about 25 women since D
Joined: Aug 2015
Posts: 1,142
Likes: 5
P
Member
Offline
Member
P
Joined: Aug 2015
Posts: 1,142
Likes: 5
kml and Don beat me to it.... def try and stay out of newcomers. I only ventured there because of your post and jeeessshhhh. Must take so much energy to hang out up there.

Hang in there Ginger!!

Joined: Jun 2015
Posts: 6,119
Likes: 408
B
Member
Offline
Member
B
Joined: Jun 2015
Posts: 6,119
Likes: 408
{{{{G}}}}
You have a huge heart and try to help. Time to stay away from there. Seriously. You can only help those who are willing to accept your help.

xoxoxo


M 20+ T25+
S ~15.5 (BD)
BD 4/6/15
D 12/23/16

"Someone I loved once gave me
A box full of darkness.
It took me years to understand,
That this too, was a gift."
~ Mary Oliver
Page 9 of 11 1 2 7 8 9 10 11

Moderated by  Cadet, DnJ, job, Michele Weiner-Davis 

Link Copied to Clipboard