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Hi all,

Just an update, I have retained an attorney and I am moving forward with the divorce. Got an angry message from the soon to be ex when she found out...

Then late on Father's day I get a message saying it looks like we aren't talking anymore (I have completely stopped all communication now) and then goes on to wish me a Happy Father's day and hoped I had a nice weekend.

That message sure was odd considering what she had sent previously. At any rate, I continue to work on myself every day. I'm doing well and focusing on the positives in my life!

Just thought I would check in smile

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Trying to figure out the WAS/WS mind is an exercise in futility. Even though she was clear she wanted a D, what she didn't say is "but I still want you there as Plan B". You filing for D is a sign to her that you are moving on, and she is losing her power over you.

You got this js, you are doing the right things concentrating on yourself. If you are ready to move on, then moving the D forward is the right approach!

Hopefully you didn't respond to any of those messages. YOu should be NC at this point. No responses unless she asks a direct question, but even then only answer the question in as few words as possible. Yes or no questions get yes or no answers.


M(53), W(54),D(19)
M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017
Ring and Piecing since March 2018
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Thank you Steve85, I have been no contact.

I'll admit that message on Father's day bothered me quite a bit. The part where she says, "looks like we aren't talking anymore". I mean yeah, what do you expect, you wanted a divorce?

Just frustrating, I had to vent somewhere, so I'm posting here!

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I'll admit that message on Father's day bothered me quite a bit. The part where she says, "looks like we aren't talking anymore". I mean yeah, what do you expect, you wanted a divorce?


Put a sticky note on your brain that says, "WW's are not logical". You are reading her messages from a logical viewpoint, therefore, it leaves you feeling very confused. She's not logical, and won't make sense. Why torture yourself trying to make sense of crazy?




Last edited by sandi2; 07/16/20 06:27 PM.

It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
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Hi all!

I know I haven't posted for a while.

I just wanted to thank everyone on this forum for being there for me. It got me through many hard days. Even just spending time reading through past situations, and advice given to others. I truly appreciate the time that is put into this forum.

Unfortunately (or maybe fortunately?) I did proceed with my divorce. I am no longer married. I did up meeting a wonderful woman and we have certainly hit it off. 2021 is going well so far and I am looking forward to continuing to work on myself.

I know I made mistakes in my past marriage, I know my ex made mistakes as well. The only advice I can give to other newcomers on this forum, is to just always work on yourself and things will come out all right!

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It's always sad to read when a divorce has been finalized, but it's good to see people grow from the experience. Good luck with your new relationship. The hard part is not falling back into old, bad habits.

Last edited by harvey; 03/03/21 08:18 AM.
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