Unfortunately this is a typical behavior by WW and LBS. you were given great advice and you ignored it it. She gave her word and went back on it. I would frame it as you have thought about it and you need time and space to think about what you want and ask her to to move back to her mothers. I doubt she will but it’s worth a shot. My guess is that she’s still in contact with om and she’s going along with this facade that she gave it one more try and there’s no spark. Let me ask you a question. Take out her words. Is she doing anything to make you feel like she’s trying to recon with you?
Well that's great of her to be so supportive (insert eyeroll). You got to hold strong and no more talking. She has to believe she may lose you for you to have any chance. Go completely NC. You don't have kids right?
Again if she wanted to work on it she would not leave so easily. IMO she never comes home again until she is seriously interesting in reconcile. You should probably start to prepare and see a lawyer.
W has been messaging tonight asking to see me tomorrow. I've told her I'll most likely be out but she can come and grab her things. Says she really misses me but is confused when we're together. Told her I need space to figure things out.
Out of curiosity, (purely hypothetically) if she *was* telling the truth would anything about my DB'ing be different? She says EA/PA before Christmas. Decided it was a bad idea and called it off, remained friends. Felt pretty pleased with herself that she ended it herself. Probably IMs OM a few times a week, doesn't see any harm in that and thinks he is unimportant and main problem is feels confused/can't get the spark back with H and M.
W has been messaging tonight asking to see me tomorrow. I've told her I'll most likely be out but she can come and grab her things. Says she really misses me but is confused when we're together. Told her I need space to figure things out.
Perfect!!! Well done.
Originally Posted by OS2
Out of curiosity, (purely hypothetically) if she *was* telling the truth would anything about my DB'ing be different? She says EA/PA before Christmas. Decided it was a bad idea and called it off, remained friends. Felt pretty pleased with herself that she ended it herself. Probably IMs OM a few times a week, doesn't see any harm in that and thinks he is unimportant and main problem is feels confused/can't get the spark back with H and M.
No DBing is never different. GAL. 180s. Detachment. Even after starting to R, those things should continue.
Remember, when she wants to reconcile, you will know. When she doesn't, you'll be confused.
Her desire to R will be impossible to miss. In the meantime, always be DBing.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
W just called me and said she thought she needed space but misses me and is worried that I’ve said I need space. She said she felt pressured when she came back. Probably something I messed up. She said she might look at buying a house/renting as she can’t continue living at her mum’s. Obv isn’t ready to work on M but said doesn’t want to be left out in the cold.
She’s manipulating you with threatening about getting another house. You’re suppose to be NC and you guys speak more then most married couples. Here is one hundred percent fact. She will not get her feelings back for you while she is still messaging other male. If you can hold your ground here you may have a very slight chance.
