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A Message from Michele
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Posting Too Much Personal Info #2881089
01/17/20 02:29 PM
01/17/20 02:29 PM
Joined: Jan 2000
Posts: 27,162
Southern Maryland
job Offline OP

Member
job  Offline OP

Member
Joined: Jan 2000
Posts: 27,162
Southern Maryland
As reminder to the posters, the Internet forums are not 100% safe and secure. Anyone can come here and read your postings without being a member.

Posting personal information or specific details about your circumstances could end up being used against you should a STBX, OW, OM, or some other adversarial person in your life find this forum and then find your posts.

Most of you post anonymously. However, some of you post too many specifics to remain anonymous should said adversarial persons happen upon this forum. If you have too much "specific" info in your postings and want to remove the info, please notify us and direct us to the postings and tell us what needs to be deleted. Keep in mind, we cannot determine what is too personal for you...that's why it is important that you tell us what you want deleted.

We have been receiving a few requests to either delete/edit postings and/or how to go about changing member names in the last week. If you change your name only, your new name will appear in all of your past/present postings.

Be sure to clear your browser of "cookies/cache" after you are done posting. This will help keep snoopers from finding you. Do not leave any books, papers that you have printed, etc., out in the open for the snoopers to find.

Please be smart. I certainly wouldn't want to post personal info on a forum and then have it used against me in a court battle. Neither should any of you.

Re: Posting Too Much Personal Info [Re: job] #2881093
01/17/20 02:39 PM
01/17/20 02:39 PM
Joined: Jan 2000
Posts: 27,162
Southern Maryland
job Offline OP

Member
job  Offline OP

Member
Joined: Jan 2000
Posts: 27,162
Southern Maryland
Cadet,

Do you have any additional info to add to this posting? Please feel free to edit/add your info to the above posting.

Re: Posting Too Much Personal Info [Re: doodler] #2881106
01/17/20 03:44 PM
01/17/20 03:44 PM
Joined: Apr 2016
Posts: 2,989
Canada
A
AndrewP Offline
Member
AndrewP  Offline
Member
A
Joined: Apr 2016
Posts: 2,989
Canada
I do agree that some of us, myself included do post too identifying of information. A lot of it is understandable as we look at this as a "community" but as Cadet and job both know far far too well, there are lurkers in the shadows watching us around our little camp-fire. Some of these are indeed hard to avoid

Some items that come to mind easily are:
- Place names
- Events attended or intended to be attended by ourselves, our children or our family
- First names of yourself or others (hangs head shamefully)
- Job details

I have been found here both by those who I was happy to have find me and those not. I have also found others. Similarly, some were happy to be found and others prefer to be left in anonymity. This is an issue, not only for the safety and integrity of the community, but also the safety of the posters. The unsung efforts of the moderators plus the MWD organization can't be understated. We are very fortunate to have such caring people watching over us.

Understandably posting some information is necessary to provide context for the individual poster and their journey and struggles. It's a difficult balance.

There are real people out there watching. Domestic violence is one of the many things that has led people to this place. People can be injured or worse. Most people on this forum, especially those newcomers are in a very fragile place as I can remember all too well from my own journey. There are also those who while they may have good intentions, can have disastrous impacts on the lives or psyche of people they may find.

Last edited by job; 01/25/20 06:53 PM. Reason: Removed a posting/comment that was not directly related to this topic

On BD
H52, W50
T27, M26
S21, D23
BD-9-Mar-16
D-15-Jan-18 Final-19-Apr-18
I am a storyteller. The story may do you no good.
But a story is never for the listener. It is always for the one who tells
Re: Posting Too Much Personal Info [Re: job] #2881113
01/17/20 04:04 PM
01/17/20 04:04 PM
Joined: May 2019
Posts: 1,216
U
unchien Offline
Member
unchien  Offline
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U
Joined: May 2019
Posts: 1,216
Dumb question... how do we notify the moderators if we have a concern?

Re: Posting Too Much Personal Info [Re: unchien] #2881115
01/17/20 04:12 PM
01/17/20 04:12 PM
Joined: Apr 2016
Posts: 2,989
Canada
A
AndrewP Offline
Member
AndrewP  Offline
Member
A
Joined: Apr 2016
Posts: 2,989
Canada
Originally Posted by unchien
Dumb question... how do we notify the moderators if we have a concern?

Use the "Report" button on the post that is in question. They're usually pretty quick to take notice.


On BD
H52, W50
T27, M26
S21, D23
BD-9-Mar-16
D-15-Jan-18 Final-19-Apr-18
I am a storyteller. The story may do you no good.
But a story is never for the listener. It is always for the one who tells
Re: Posting Too Much Personal Info [Re: job] #2881116
01/17/20 04:13 PM
01/17/20 04:13 PM
Joined: Aug 2018
Posts: 826
F
FlySolo Offline
Member
FlySolo  Offline
Member
F
Joined: Aug 2018
Posts: 826
It is such a pity that people use this site as a means to spy on us. People use this forum as a place to vent, to rage, to share their sadness, and to celebrate their achievements. Everyone's opening posts probably has enough information to identify someone if someone knew what they were looking for.

Job and Cadet, thank you for maintaining such vigilance on our behalf.


W40 (me), H40
M14, Together 16
D12, D9

BD Oct 17
Moved out Mar 18

Re: Posting Too Much Personal Info [Re: job] #2881258
01/18/20 01:51 PM
01/18/20 01:51 PM
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 13,117
NY
Cadet Offline

Member
Cadet  Offline

Member
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 13,117
NY
Originally Posted by job
Cadet,

Do you have any additional info to add to this posting? Please feel free to edit/add your info to the above posting.


The only other thing I would add is please try to be as specific as possible when reporting a post.

Links to the post you want edited if it is not the post you reported are helpful - also something we can copy and paste in its place is also helpful.

I am usually on line during business hours weekdays (EST), weekends Job does a great deal of the moderating.
Please help keep our workload to a minimum as you all make the same amount as us.


Me-66, D33,S32
Re: Posting Too Much Personal Info [Re: job] #2881699
01/21/20 06:50 PM
01/21/20 06:50 PM
Joined: Feb 2017
Posts: 1,061
H
hoosjim Offline
Member
hoosjim  Offline
Member
H
Joined: Feb 2017
Posts: 1,061
Yeah, i think i am probably guilty of this too. I frequent other MBs and am also on twitter and FB and i also tend to dictate a lot of things, so I have a tendency to let my familiarity on one forum bleed over into others. Pretty sure I have likely left enough clues back through my threads and posts, not to mention my first name usage, to i.d. me if someone was looking to do so.

I'll have to take a look.

Last edited by hoosjim; 01/21/20 06:59 PM.

H53/W51, R-ing 4/'18

"Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires"-Sg.of Sg 2:7

"So oftentimes it happens,that we live our lives in chains, & we never even know we have the key"-Eagles III 1:3

Moderated by  Cadet, job, Virginia 

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