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MJ1980 #2867949 10/11/19 12:15 AM
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Funny? I thought I read skydiving instead of ATVing for GAL. That's what prompted that joke. I guess the mind sees what it wants to see. Have a blast quadding man! I love it. Have a few upstste NY and a few 3 wheelers too from the 80's. Don't forget to wear protection. (For riding that is. ;-) )

IHCLACS #2867953 10/11/19 01:00 AM
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Originally Posted by IHCLACS
Funny? I thought I read skydiving instead of ATVing for GAL. That's what prompted that joke. I guess the mind sees what it wants to see. Have a blast quadding man! I love it. Have a few upstste NY and a few 3 wheelers too from the 80's. Don't forget to wear protection. (For riding that is. ;-) )


Thanks will do. I have a 400ex. Ridden a few 3 wheelers too. Never again that’s right up there with marriage for unpredictability.


M:39
W:36
D: 4
D: 2
BD:8/22/2019
Currently dealing with a WW
MJ1980 #2867988 10/11/19 01:25 PM
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So my wife and I texted some this morning because of the kids. June was sick last night but now is feeling better. The younger one was coughing last night. So we basically split up and each took care of one. Surpingly my wife stepped up and offered to have my older daughter who was sleep her. She has been very detached from the kids since the BD at the end of August.

So this morning she texted me some kid updates which I responded to. But now she is sending me small talk texts about weird dream she had. I haven’t responded but she is trying to just small talk stuff. Thinking just ignore this one. This whole WW thing is bizarre


M:39
W:36
D: 4
D: 2
BD:8/22/2019
Currently dealing with a WW
MJ1980 #2868067 10/12/19 04:51 AM
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So my wife decided to go for little meet up. She thought I was asleep putting the kids down. She snuck out. I didn’t her her. So after the kids were down I went to get stuff ready for my atv trip tomorrow. I needed to discuss logistics for tomorrow evening and Sunday since my wife has two concerts and work booth on Sunday. She is claiming she is at her friends. She straight lied to our daughter when she asked if she could sleep with her.

Me: Hey where did you go? I needed to talk to you about some stuff for tomorrow and Sunday?
H: Can we talk in the morning?
Me: Not really I'm Leaving early and you'll be home late.
H: Just text me
Me: No you can come talk to Me about our kids.
H: I can talk over text.
Me: If you can't talk to me in person about our kids I will figure things out on my own for them.
H: Call me then
me:I'm still your husband for the time being. You can come be a responsible parent and talk to me face to face about the kids or you can choose to do whatever it is your doing. Choice is yours.
H: I walked to Melissa's to hang out for a bit. It's been a long week. There is no reason to bring my parenting into this. I'm happy to call you now or wake up early to discuss things. You already know the schedule for the weekend.

I didn’t respond. She called me. Tried to chew me out about the schedule. I replied with how am I supposed to trust anything you tell me with all the lying. You have never given me anything concrete about the A being over. You asked me to go to counseling. Yet nothing has happened with that either. You lied to our daughter on why she could not sleep with you. Where does it stop. She was silent. I was like whatever at that point and said let’s go over the schedule and then I hung up.

Just so messed up trying to justify this garbage. I need to stay the course. Detach 180 GAL.


M:39
W:36
D: 4
D: 2
BD:8/22/2019
Currently dealing with a WW
MJ1980 #2868076 10/12/19 10:25 AM
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Man... Talk about evasive on her part. Outstanding job at holding her accountable every step of the way. I wouldn't push it too hard, but for every evasive response regarding the children, keep holding her feet to the fire. You see the thing is, they will try to evade, coerce, duck, dodge avoid, blame and shame and label us as controlling to justify their actions when they clearly know what they are doing is wrong because they are subjected to their feelings. NOT PRINCIPLES!

MJ1980 #2868082 10/12/19 12:19 PM
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MJ,

You have a full blown WW on your hands and your try to use logic and reason with her which will not work. Do not bring up counseling and do not ask her about her whereabouts anymore. Set up a schedule for who is in charge of the kids each day. Be scarce when you have the kids and definitely when you do not have the kids. Do not reply to any texts that do not involve kids or finances.

Time to start planning your life for you and your kids moving forward.

LH19 #2868084 10/12/19 12:35 PM
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Originally Posted by LH19
MJ,

You have a full blown WW on your hands and your try to use logic and reason with her which will not work. Do not bring up counseling and do not ask her about her whereabouts anymore. Set up a schedule for who is in charge of the kids each day. Be scarce when you have the kids and definitely when you do not have the kids. Do not reply to any texts that do not involve kids or finances.

Time to start planning your life for you and your kids moving forward.


Will do that was my thought process after last night. I already have this past week started making arrangements. I haven’t moved my paycheck yet since all the bills are set up for auto withdrawal from the joint account. But she is essentially out of control. Totally in the thick of the fog. She is in about month 3 of the affair with captain deadbeat. I was able to verify the time line of when it started right after the BD.

Also my lawyer sent her lawyer the counter to her filing last night. So she should get that this week. She will be upset since I’m seeking 50/50 for the kids. She wants primary.

Last edited by MJ1980; 10/12/19 12:38 PM.

M:39
W:36
D: 4
D: 2
BD:8/22/2019
Currently dealing with a WW
MJ1980 #2868086 10/12/19 12:44 PM
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Absolutely seek 50/50 custody not because it will upset her because it is the right thing to do.

Can you add a signature like mine below? It helps us understand your sitch more.

LH19 #2868147 10/13/19 03:56 PM
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So a little update after Friday night. So I went out a GAL all day Saturday. When my wife got home from her orchestra concert she was talkative. She apologized for how she acted the other night with refusing to talk to me face to face. Then she proceeded to talk to me for about a hour about a bunch of things. She wanted to talk about stuff going on with the kids. She brought up wanting to Go to counseling again. Asked me about my day. I answered where I felt like it was appropriate, validated, and listened to her.

She is very all over the place. Some days she is very snarky, deceptive and evasive and not very fun to be around. Other days she seems like she is trying to connect. The whole WW thing is a project and a half to figure out.


M:39
W:36
D: 4
D: 2
BD:8/22/2019
Currently dealing with a WW
MJ1980 #2868236 10/14/19 05:19 PM
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Go for 50 50 custody. You will get it. I got 50 50. Didnt even have to go to court for it. Its hard man. Even after D its hard. The kids are going to hurt badly for a while. My kids are very hurt from all of this.


M:16
T:21
H(me) 38
WW: 38
S11 D16 D19
Red Flags of A: March 2018
ILYBNILWY: August 4, 2018
Moved out of MBR: September 24, 2018
BD/Confirmation of A: October 31, 2018
D Filed: March 27, 2019
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