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DavidUK Offline OP
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Following from thread: http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2801173&page=4

I don't trust W at all about anything.

Today, W and kids met me at an event. Wife called me to say they would be late. She then sent a text message to say the same thing. I think she sent the text as she is keeping records of everything.

W said I looked very smart. We walked around together for about an hour (I said and did all the right things) and then W said she was leaving to go food shopping. I saw lots of families I knew. It was hard being the only lone parent with one exception.

At the end, I walked from the event with my kids and the other lone parent and her kids towards a shop to get drinks. W drove towards us and stopped the car. W offered the kids and I a lift to the shop (I was surprised that she let me into the car). W stopped the car at the shop and wanted to take a photo of the kids & I. I declined my photo because I don't trust her. The way I look has changed a lot recently. I wondered whether W might even want a photo of me to give to someone to give me D papers. That is how little I trust W.

W wasn't going to go into the shop with the kids & I but then changed her mind. It seemed that she didn't really need to buy anything as she had already been food shopping. I walked away to buy my own stuff. She then offered me a lift home.

W then asked if I still needed a computer fixing. I did. She offered to get if fixed for me. I asked why. W said she wanted everything to be alright. She said I needed to get the computer fixed so that I can earn more money to pay bills. I don't trust her motives for anything.

I'd forgotten to buy some bread so she offered me hers. I didn't accept it. W said her house was very messy. I said mine is very tidy.

If I was to take W at face value then it would seem quite positive, but I can't trust her.

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Your W is acting strangely. I don't see it yet either, but in time you will know.

She probably offered the ridge bc you were walking with another woman, IMO...


H 34
W 29
BD 3/12/18
Divorce Busted Spring 19

It is not things that bother us, but the stories we tell ourselves about things.
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DavidUK Offline OP
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It seems that I was right why W wanted to take a photo of me.

"The process server (of divorce papers) will need a recent photo and description of your spouse."

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DavidUK Offline OP
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I think W is so obsessed with getting a fast D that I've no chance of saving our marriage. She isn't even willing to talk about our relationship. We have 2 lovely little children. I really feel for them because they deserve so much better.

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Hi David,

Why would she want to save it if she doesn't love you anymore?

Have you ever considered this?

Sometimes it really is that simple sometimes.

I dont understand what children have to do with anything? - if she isn't happy she isn't going to stay - no matter what house, home, kids or whatever you have.

You are wasting valuable energy here focusing on her saying (you look good) or you stating (i said and did all the right things) whatever - it means nothing - and she is quite clearly keeping you sweet while we plots her escape to her "new" life.

Your going round and round in circles.

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DavidUK Offline OP
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Hi Benito,

I realise that which is why I don't trust anything she says or does.

I owe it to my kids and myself to be able to say that I've done my best to save our marriage.

If she wasn't moving so fast and telling so many lies then I would be confident that we could fall back in love.

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Hi David,

What makes you confident she would fall back in love with you?

Just asking to understand

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DavidUK Offline OP
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We have always been great together when we spend time alone just the 2 of us. We'd not had that time for many months. I think the S has been good for me in many ways. I think that given time and space with the 2 of us alone it would work again . Having said that, I've lost trust in her and I'm disappointed in how she is behaving so I'd only want to take it very slowly even if there was a chance.

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Ok..

What happens is she doesnt love you anymore?

You can't make people love you.

Whats your plan then?

Once again just asking to understand

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DavidUK Offline OP
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I have several different plans but they are dependant upon what a D settlement would be like, whether she would be with someone else or whether I will be. Even if she came back I would be very cautious as she's lost my trust.

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