or CALL 303-444-7004 to get started right away!

 

 


A Divorce Busting® Coach can help you save your marriage, even when your spouse wants out.


Save your marriage singlehandedly!
Divorce Busting Telephone Coaching DISCOUNT
SAVE$30 -- 3-SESSIONS for ONLY $360
- valid until September 30

CALL 303-444-7004
or to order online at the Divorce Busting Store
use code SAVE$30

A Message from Michele
Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Page 10 of 11 1 2 8 9 10 11
Re: Attaining MEH [Re: dale165] #2760784
09/10/17 02:08 PM
09/10/17 02:08 PM
Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 13,511
CA- now East coast
2
25yearsmlc Offline
Member
25yearsmlc  Offline
Member
2
Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 13,511
CA- now East coast
Hi T3

well, I guess some people will do anything to find a distraction to help with detachment...

((( )))


M: 57 H: 60
M: 35 yrs
S30,D28,D19
H off to Alaska 2006
Recon 7/07- 8/08
*2016*
X = "ALASKA 2.0"
GROUND HOG DAY
I File D 10/16
OW
DIV 2/26/2018
X marries OW 5/2016

= CLOSURE 4 ME
Embrace the Change
Re: Attaining MEH [Re: 25yearsmlc] #2761064
09/12/17 02:03 AM
09/12/17 02:03 AM
Joined: Apr 2014
Posts: 1,680
Sunny Florida
T
T384 Offline OP
Member
T384  Offline OP
Member
T
Joined: Apr 2014
Posts: 1,680
Sunny Florida
Hi all, guess I should update a bit. I'll try to keep it brief.

We are still in NC and still without power at home. Our neighborhood, historically, is always the last to get power and in talking with the utilities company this morning we're looking at at least a week frown I work Friday so we will be having to come home soon to deal with it.

On the H front, he is back in PA with OW. He didn't tell me about this, he had been texting me and I sent a message that I wouldn't be responding while he was with her. And now for the drum roll ... he's moving there. My attorney told me a couple weeks ago and I'm still processing it. Anyway, long story short he's wanting to get the D over with ASAP because he's moving there. He's already working in one of his work locations up there that he will transfer to.

I would like to say I'm shocked? Those of you who followed my story last time know how nuts he was. He didn't move last time because his OW lived here but I wouldn't have put that past him if she didn't. He's contesting the divorce (duh) but did agree for me to be the primary custodian of the boys. WHEW that's s weight lifted. Basically he will still have time sharing but all decision making will be mine ON MY OWN. I won't have to ask permission to do ANYTHING. we can move, we can travel, we can do whatever we want without him holding us under his finger! If there's one good bit of news I got it was that! He did decline/refute to pay child support saying I have the means to support the children. He declined basically everything else, me having the house, property, helping with medical insurance for the kids, and of course alimony. Thing is ... he's in a rush to leave and I'm in no hurry to get this divorce done so time is on my side as far as fighting for what the boys and I deserve.

On a happy note... for those of you that love Train- she is sweeter and more awesome in person! I am seriously so thankful for her and all of you by she has been my one on one Dr. Phil smile her family is pretty awesome too, even her husband:)


M 31 H 34
S 6 S 9
BD 2/14 Piecing 8/14
Re: Attaining MEH [Re: T384] #2761073
09/12/17 02:31 AM
09/12/17 02:31 AM
Joined: Mar 2017
Posts: 275
C
cadence Offline
Member
cadence  Offline
Member
C
Joined: Mar 2017
Posts: 275
T! Glad to hear you're safe and sound.

Quote:
but did agree for me to be the primary custodian of the boys. WHEW that's s weight lifted. Basically he will still have time sharing but all decision making will be mine ON MY OWN. I won't have to ask permission to do ANYTHING. we can move, we can travel, we can do whatever we want without him holding us under his finger! If there's one good bit of news I got it was that!


Yes! Get that in writing and signed ASAP.

Quote:
He did decline/refute to pay child support saying I have the means to support the children.


Yeahhhhh, that's not how that works. It's not based on opinion, and you don't get to opt out of paying for your kids, especially if he's moving and you're the primary caretaker. But don't break that to him until you've got his agreement on granting custody to you. Actually, don't break it to him at all. Let the realization slowly dawn on him.

Quote:
Thing is ... he's in a rush to leave and I'm in no hurry to get this divorce done so time is on my side as far as fighting for what the boys and I deserve.


Be careful, though. He seems to have some magical thinking about how this will go, and time will challenge that magical thinking. Once he starts getting doses of reality ("What do you mean I can't just say 'I'd rather not pay child support'?"), he may back out of granting you custody.

Quote:
On a happy note... for those of you that love Train- she is sweeter and more awesome in person! I am seriously so thankful for her and all of you by she has been my one on one Dr. Phil smile her family is pretty awesome too, even her husband:)


Glad you got to meet her smile

Re: Attaining MEH [Re: T384] #2761205
09/12/17 08:25 AM
09/12/17 08:25 AM
Joined: Aug 2012
Posts: 8,033
A
AnotherStander Offline
Member
AnotherStander  Offline
Member
A
Joined: Aug 2012
Posts: 8,033
Originally Posted By: T384
He did decline/refute to pay child support saying I have the means to support the children. He declined basically everything else, me having the house, property, helping with medical insurance for the kids, and of course alimony. Thing is ... he's in a rush to leave and I'm in no hurry to get this divorce done so time is on my side as far as fighting for what the boys and I deserve.


YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME!!!!!! I just hope I never come across your H and know who he is because I would be so tempted to put a fist backed by years of shared anger and frustration from this forum right through his face, LOL! Wow, words fail me. How could ANY man just walk away from his children and move to another state where he will see them rarely if ever? Refuse to contribute financially AT ALL to them? People like him to not deserve the honor of fatherhood in the first place. Do you have a lock of his hair you can send me? I'm going to look into how to make a voodoo doll mad


Me: 59 w/ S17, D23, D26
Current R: 4 years
Previous M: 21 years; BD: 06-14-12; S: 09-10-12; D final: 03-17-14; XW:56
Re: Attaining MEH [Re: AnotherStander] #2761231
09/12/17 09:49 AM
09/12/17 09:49 AM
Joined: Jul 2017
Posts: 71
S
SwHubby Offline
Member
SwHubby  Offline
Member
S
Joined: Jul 2017
Posts: 71
Agree!


H-30s W-30s
M-5 T-10
D4
ILYBNILWY/BD-May/17
W moves out-May/17
D filed-May/17
House sold, move to apartment-Aug/17
D going through-Jan/18?
Re: Attaining MEH [Re: SwHubby] #2761242
09/12/17 01:09 PM
09/12/17 01:09 PM
Joined: Jan 2017
Posts: 147
H
Henwen Offline
Member
Henwen  Offline
Member
H
Joined: Jan 2017
Posts: 147
Second that agree. Wow T. So sorry. You are so better off without him. No man worth anything would do that to his kids and family.


Me: 41 H: 45
T:21 yrs
S:16 D: 13 S: 12
BD: October 2016
Re: Attaining MEH [Re: Henwen] #2761262
09/13/17 12:19 AM
09/13/17 12:19 AM
Joined: Apr 2014
Posts: 3,500
M
Maybell Offline
Member
Maybell  Offline
Member
M
Joined: Apr 2014
Posts: 3,500
So, he wants to move to Pennsylvania with his new Schmoopie, he wants you to take the kids full time, and he doesn't want you to have the house, child support, health insurance, or any property.

WOW. That's b@llsy. I seriously wonder what his lawyer thought putting all that together. It looks like impression management is off the table.

Rake him over the coals, T, I'd love to see you send him to PA with the shirt on his back.

What a valuable human being he is. His mother must be so proud.


Me42, H40
D12, S8, S7
A revealed: 7/13
Sep 4/14; Agreed to D 1/15

She believed she could, so she did.
Re: Attaining MEH [Re: Maybell] #2761333
09/13/17 05:59 AM
09/13/17 05:59 AM
Joined: Apr 2014
Posts: 1,680
Sunny Florida
T
T384 Offline OP
Member
T384  Offline OP
Member
T
Joined: Apr 2014
Posts: 1,680
Sunny Florida
AS - I literally Lol'd at the voodoo doll comment for quite some time yesterday so seriously thank you for that!!!!

His mom stands by him. He's her son.

There's nothing more I can do at this point then fight for what the kids and I deserve and regain some self respect for myself.

I'm so sick of him hearing that we need to be civil. I don't need a lecture on civility from him.


M 31 H 34
S 6 S 9
BD 2/14 Piecing 8/14
Re: Attaining MEH [Re: Maybell] #2761387
09/13/17 10:08 AM
09/13/17 10:08 AM
Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 13,511
CA- now East coast
2
25yearsmlc Offline
Member
25yearsmlc  Offline
Member
2
Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 13,511
CA- now East coast
Originally Posted By: Maybell
So, he wants to move to Pennsylvania with his new Schmoopie, he wants you to take the kids full time, and he doesn't want you to have the house, child support, health insurance, or any property.

WOW. That's b@llsy. I seriously wonder what his lawyer thought putting all that together. It looks like impression management is off the table.

Rake him over the coals, T, I'd love to see you send him to PA with the shirt on his back.

What a valuable human being he is. His mother must be so proud.



THIS ^^^ Maybell, great analysis.

Um, T3, a rare event is occurring. I AM SPEECHLESS.

write down the date...


M: 57 H: 60
M: 35 yrs
S30,D28,D19
H off to Alaska 2006
Recon 7/07- 8/08
*2016*
X = "ALASKA 2.0"
GROUND HOG DAY
I File D 10/16
OW
DIV 2/26/2018
X marries OW 5/2016

= CLOSURE 4 ME
Embrace the Change
Re: Attaining MEH [Re: 25yearsmlc] #2762355
09/19/17 08:01 AM
09/19/17 08:01 AM
Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 13,511
CA- now East coast
2
25yearsmlc Offline
Member
25yearsmlc  Offline
Member
2
Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 13,511
CA- now East coast
T3,

are you okay? Let us know.


M: 57 H: 60
M: 35 yrs
S30,D28,D19
H off to Alaska 2006
Recon 7/07- 8/08
*2016*
X = "ALASKA 2.0"
GROUND HOG DAY
I File D 10/16
OW
DIV 2/26/2018
X marries OW 5/2016

= CLOSURE 4 ME
Embrace the Change
Page 10 of 11 1 2 8 9 10 11

Moderated by  Cadet, job, Virginia 

Save Your Marriage! Schedule Online

Schedule a phone consultation with a Divorce Busting® Coach! Call: 800-664-2435 or 303-444-7004