This is tougher than I imagined..

[Zephyr]

Hmmm, why don't you tell him that You need it.

This ordeal has been so hard on you that it has been difficult at best to move forward. Tell him that you understand his reluctance, but you need the healing. You were the one who was injured. You were the one who feels like this is being swept under the rug.

Tell him that this is not to punish him. Just you at uncomfortable the way that there has been no real closure and growth that is necessary for both of you moving forward from his affair.

It is really important to have help in this and not just let things not get worked out.

[kippz]

good to hear from you Cherry. It's an uphill climb for my H and I as well. Sometimes, we backslide.

i hope things work out and hoping your marriage will soon get to where you want it to be.

[Cherry]

Thank you. Yeah it really is an uphill climb. Some days we seem good. Others, well I think my anxiety creeps in. I over read every signal. Or I miss the romantic days of how he used to pull me close and make me feel the most incredible woman. When I talked to him about this, he pointed out that I concentrate on what he doesn't do- I don't think of what he does do. And he is right with that.
I must admit I feel I'm slipping back into bad old habits. I've started more GAL activities. And I guess although we need our us time- I need him to see the strong woman again.

[Fogg]

Good to hear from you Cherry. I agree with what the others said and I think you both need professional help navigating through this difficult time.

I'm concerned with many of the things hes said when you try to talk about things or get help. I'm not sure what you should exactly do but I don't think sweeping things under the rug will be healthy for either of you in the future.

Keep us updated and good luck.

[MrBond]

You need to see a MC right away. I haven't seen a couple yet who have gotten back together and made it last without it. You need someone who will help you navigate through those turbulent waters. Over time, those bad thoughts will fade away.

[T384]

Cherry, I again will echo what others are saying. MC helped tremendously in more ways than one during piecing for us. Please make a point of it

[Cherry]

You're all right.. I have a post on the newcomers board. Looks like I belong there again.


I don't think I have the strength to do this again