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edz Offline OP
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part 11 was about to lock so here's part 12.

Things on somewhat of an even keel, relation with s has entered a phase where he seems open and sharing,w is being warmer but no signs of moving her stance, I had a time of wondering whether to give up on m and go dating and decided its not the time. No movement on the mysterious something I can't talk about on the forum.

Just got into new much smaller clothes and got a wow from w's friend who hadn't seen me since last year and about a stone and a half ago.

And ...... Wait for it.........begin..


M:44, W:46, S:10
M 13 years, T 15
BD:23/7/2014
W/S Moved to MIL: 23/7/2014
My new place: 21/11/2014
W/S back to flat 22/11/2014
W coming closer, talking 4/2015
Piecing 5/2015
Moving in again 6/2015
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edz Offline OP
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Morning all

Well starting slow today after a frenetic day yesterday. At one with the duvet at the mo and I can hear s has his media on in his room. Bft is prowling but judging by the foot I put out of the bed it seems chilly to emerge and I'm not keen.

Managed to get a chunk of house stuff done last night once s was in bed which was good.

Odd dreams last night, can't lock them down, most likely the noodle spin drying the events of yesterday, not sure.

Will be off to my dads later, old jeans for that as I need to (a) be mobbed by his dogs and (b) get in an attic get chairs and manhandle then into a car.

Not too sure on what time s needs to be back so assuming no limit and will aim for 7 not going to contact w on it unless she pings me. Nothing yet since recipes etc last night so she's at least relaxing on s it seems.

Still have that pensive feeling, had an email this morning from the dating site after turning off the profile last week. Of course they're just drumming up visitors but started that churning in my head again. Ah well putting it in the box today for not worrying about just yet.


M:44, W:46, S:10
M 13 years, T 15
BD:23/7/2014
W/S Moved to MIL: 23/7/2014
My new place: 21/11/2014
W/S back to flat 22/11/2014
W coming closer, talking 4/2015
Piecing 5/2015
Moving in again 6/2015
Joined: Jul 2014
Posts: 1,942
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edz Offline OP
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There are times I wonder does w read my threads....

.... Two minutes after the above she called me and we spent a good 35 minutes discussing did s have clothes (he didn't pack any but I washed yesterdays and have sufficient for him here) schools his progress, cats his card event..

Nice and seems to be becoming a regular sat morning s info dump, not sure if there's any side motive or not, not having expectations but the core could have been a short text, I dont want a short text believe me but it could have been.

W offered to drop trousers etc off, said its fine but she's welcome if she wants a coffee. And it is were off out at 11:30ish before then no problem with her popping by.

Suppose we shall see.


M:44, W:46, S:10
M 13 years, T 15
BD:23/7/2014
W/S Moved to MIL: 23/7/2014
My new place: 21/11/2014
W/S back to flat 22/11/2014
W coming closer, talking 4/2015
Piecing 5/2015
Moving in again 6/2015
Joined: Apr 2014
Posts: 2,118
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Posts: 2,118
Oh well, at least you know what time. Let's hope the coffee goes well.

Wish it was cold here, then being sick would be nice. It will be much warmer soon edzs. We are already on the heading Into cooler weather.

Hopefuly gal will provide some new friends. Then you can have some plutonic dates. Like my dinners. It's fun and when Im lazy at least I get one great dinner per week I didn't have to cook myself always a bonus.


M 46 h54
Both married before
T 11y
Bd 2/14 I must see where ow leads!
Ms 18 hs 26
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edz Offline OP
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Hi gg

Yes that would be nice no takers yet though frown

W has been around sat had coffee spoke about s the flat and stuff generally. She said she wasn't expecting s back today and didn't seem stressed about it which is really good so two nights boys together again. She's off to mil today something about work letter rebuttal she didn't want to talk and I wasn't going to dig.

Just dipped s in shower so he's clean for going to my dads and being licked by doggies now he's off getting dressed so I have 5 minutes.

Can't be fun being I'll in hot weather have enough trouble sleeping in hot weather if I'm not ill more a cold clear weather bod me.

Maybe its not wearing purple bed socks wink

Last edited by edz; 02/07/15 10:57 AM.

M:44, W:46, S:10
M 13 years, T 15
BD:23/7/2014
W/S Moved to MIL: 23/7/2014
My new place: 21/11/2014
W/S back to flat 22/11/2014
W coming closer, talking 4/2015
Piecing 5/2015
Moving in again 6/2015
Joined: Apr 2014
Posts: 2,118
G
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G
Joined: Apr 2014
Posts: 2,118
The mozzies have turned me into a pin cushion. Lots of small pr**ks but no x rated fun. wink hard not to feel like I wanted to be out walking too, but just can't even do my essential house stuff. Which reminds me I fogot stuff on my thread.

That's sounding postaive, that it went well. Pma works, well it most certainly doesn't make things worse.


M 46 h54
Both married before
T 11y
Bd 2/14 I must see where ow leads!
Ms 18 hs 26
Joined: Jul 2014
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edz Offline OP
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Ha gg that made laugh wink

Sorry you're being a mozzie meal citronella or not a smelly candles gal?

Yup feeling good today, happy with the weight loss even if there's more to do no idea what's up ahead thing still lurking like a lurky thing but being happy and positive can't hurt and if we dont work out, well, can't hurt to not be a mental and emotional scrapheap for whatever or whomever comes next. Yeah right edz like you won't go full emo tomorrow night pull the other one smirk

smile feel better my friend smile


M:44, W:46, S:10
M 13 years, T 15
BD:23/7/2014
W/S Moved to MIL: 23/7/2014
My new place: 21/11/2014
W/S back to flat 22/11/2014
W coming closer, talking 4/2015
Piecing 5/2015
Moving in again 6/2015
Joined: Apr 2014
Posts: 2,118
G
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Joined: Apr 2014
Posts: 2,118
Fly spray! Shot those little sucker right out of the air.

Couldn't find a candle, they were queuing to get on s17 dog! Food time for hounds bath and bed.

Don't drown on those waves huh edzs?
We all get em. Blows edzs a huge staged kiss.


M 46 h54
Both married before
T 11y
Bd 2/14 I must see where ow leads!
Ms 18 hs 26
Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 8,855
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I suspect the higher body temperature attracts the little @*i#s.

Nothing but nothing stops them. I bought a cream in India called Neem that helps but makes one smell like a compost heap.

I have been musing on memory and how overall it is poor.

Also how selective and how much we filter as a result of emotion. Depending on our state we may view the same event in the same way.

Hormonal flooding seems to deposit negative traces into long term memory and repeat association triggers further long term memory deposits. Apparently the protective structure of the amygdala causes negative memory traces to fade, it's valuable in trauma protection and forgetting physical pain. It is thus possible that reducing interaction and preventing flooding may assist in improving the WAS selective view of their history. It is their history after all.

Becoming the person only a fool would leave may incrementally retile fringes of memory. Changing the perception may change the memory, I have noticed the process of familiarisation, if we loose weight then those closest often do not notice. It is when we meet someone that we have not seen for a while that change is obvious. That is why in house S may be less effective. How soon we get used to a new hair cut or appearance change. Incremental change may thus be about subtly adapting an old view with the current vision.

When I think of H I remember him not as he was but as how he is. I have rewritten the memory of certain aspects of the old H with the new one. I see the current sitch as if it had always been as it is. This is unfair to H but is what the mind does to itself.

Why am I thinking about this? Well I am asking myself if Edz W will go wow, will W rewrite recent history back to the original. In essence we do not need for WAS to be attracted to us as if we were new propositions. We already know that we map for them, that is established otherwise why would they be attracted in the first place. My becoming the best we can be then we re attract. So the question I am asking is should Edz reveal his sauve changes gradually or in a big reveal?

Would it be best to wear the 'baggies' and then tra la? Or is the subtlety of the changes rewriting trace? Would a physical change draw attention to the overall changes. Always remembering that if we do these changes for ourselves they endure beyond transition.

V is in reflective mood to day, so apologies for the long post.

V

Last edited by Vanilla; 02/07/15 04:14 PM.

Freedom is just another word for nothing left to loose.
V 64, WAW


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edz Offline OP
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Interesting stuff v, suppose we shall see smile


M:44, W:46, S:10
M 13 years, T 15
BD:23/7/2014
W/S Moved to MIL: 23/7/2014
My new place: 21/11/2014
W/S back to flat 22/11/2014
W coming closer, talking 4/2015
Piecing 5/2015
Moving in again 6/2015
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