Now, since I have a discretionary day and I've already changed the water in my turtle's tank, I thought I'd review my collection of Dating Profile Gems and present the best of the best...yeah, I really am! Here goes...remember there's more comedy in real life than in fiction. I should publish these one day lol.
I can bet most of you that I’d kick your asses on a gun range and or skeet shooting. Looking for someone that knows how to inhale and exhale. I spend most of my time with my 2 pit bulls. I do not respond to “Hey baby, let’s do it”. Please at least message me a “hello” before you begin detailing the wild sexual positions that you wish you could get me into. I do not like self fish. You had better look like your photo... or you're buying me drinks until you do! If the extent of your conversation is “how big are your boobs” then please move on. I'm looking for someone who knows how to handle themselves in the event of a zombie apocalypse. I stitched a cat once. When you say you're looking for a "down to earth" woman, that means to me that you want to bury me in your backyard. Please respect my desired age range. And no I won't "try" you because you're younger and “think” you can last longer. I’ve been very lucky to have several long term live- in relationships with men. About myself I am simpel hardworing woman. I am a well education woman I am capable of world travel without you. You are a man who recognizes that running shoes do not go with all your outfits. Please do not comment on my ethnicity or looks. I know I’m Asian and I do own a mirror. No cheap cologne. Old Spice makes me gag. Looking for a man with ...a good sense of hummer Kinky means I'm open to interesting things, not that I'll do you just because you cross my path. I would like to find someone to date who doesn't already know and/or date everyone else I know. Most things I attempt... except pole vaulting, I can think of better things to do with poles. Food wise, not a big fan of bugs or organs... Please have a photo without a girlfriend whose face is painted black. I went on a date once and was told I'm "marilyn monroe meets the bride of frankenstein meets mother teresa... and it’s all valid. Dating would probably be easier if I were a single-cell being. On a typical Friday night I’m talking to the dead. Ride me off into the sunset, baby! Stop here if you own your dad's jeans...it's just not right!! If you’ve fallen and on the way down hit every branch on the ugly tree, don't get nasty if I don't reply. I am Chinese looking for a man in a similar condition I'm too lazy to look for love in bars or grocery stores when I can let my fingers do the walking and surf dating sites in my pajamas. I have one child who is fourteen who will not be meeting you. I am very patient unless you irritate me I am adaptable and don't mind a constructive discussion without holding any grouches. I would really like to find a man close to my bone marrow compatibility ...couples always look so sensual when they are good at salsaing. As an adventurous spirit one of my big goals is to travel the world, in order to attain this I plan on winning the lottery. I’d like to know where you live, the names of your children, and what you like to do for fun before seeing your thing. I’m funny that way. I'd like to meet a man who isn't full of crap. I like my men like I like my books...well read and bound in leather. I am politically political when it comes to politics. My rule is that if you go home with a man and he doesn’t have books...don’t f*** him. Behind every good man is a tired woman Seeking my passion fruit to complete my fruit bowl of life. I hope we have beautiful feeling each other, I am still learning the language, which I found to be fascinated God and I are on good terms, I just wish he were louder I am a good looking Filipina like you And I would prefer that you not whip it out at our first meeting. I wish I could say I was joking but sadly, I am not.
I hated match! Some guy from up north invited me to come up so he could show me lovin'. I thought.. This can't be be serious. Anyway.. Had to remove myself because I kept feeling like I needed a scalding hot shower! And I was paying for the pleasure of feeling that way! Lol. It was entertaining at least. I gained a whole new appreciation on being single.
Me:38.. H:33. Two beautiful kids S:6 D:3 M:8.. together for 11. Bomb dropped:10/17/11 Separated:11/07/11
BF, at least when they're upfront about what they want you don't waste time on them! It amazes me how many of these guys want women to fly here or there to meet them...spend the weekend etc. The two women I met on Match told me they've never dealt with these kinds of men on Match...wow! I know on POF they're plentiful. Oh well, at least my world is back to where it should be...my first "fav" of the day was a scammer...report sent! The beat goes on lol.
I got a nice reply to a message I sent on POF today...and she's not Asian lol. I rule on POF...on Match I suuck! My response rate on POF is about 70% but on Match maybe 20%. Weird. I send out the same messages and the same type of ladies...so I dunno. This one said "Hi Whatis, what a lovely profile you have written. I thoroughly enjoyed reading it. I'm an Anglican, if that matters to you. Let me know if you'd still like to chat" Nice! I'm very upfront about my Adventist affiliation and if they don't like it...tough titty. Do you have Anglican's in the U.S. or are they called pesto or pasto feelians or something? Anyway, we shall see where it goes. I've decided I don't have to marry somebody because I've reached out to them...I can chat and see where it goes, if nowhere that's fine. I'm in no rush.
