Not Giving Up

[Thornton]

It's absolutely not attractive to a woman, I agree.

I do need to man the f*ck up. This experience has stripped me of my self confidence, I absolutely need to get that back. I WILL get it back.

[Wonka]

The pity party is over. Ok..what are your GAL plans for the rest of the week, Thorn?

For what it's worth, the last time Ms. Wonka and I texted was back in March which makes it, what, 3 solid months of total darkness. I haven't said a peep since. And I'm okay because I am too busy living my life and enjoying it.

Right now, an old college friend and I are now making plans for her to visit me fairly soon which makes me beyond excited by this. We've been friends for over 20 years.

[Thornton]

Unfortunately, no plans yet. I've only been in my current town for 3 months so haven't made many friends, yet.

I'm scared to death of heights. I might say eff' it and try skydiving in the near future. They have a small airport near me and they do offer tandem skydiving. It would probably do wonders for my confidence to face something I'm terrified of.

I am also a former competetive tennis player (haven't played in years) but plan on looking into getting some lessons to get the rust out and then start playing tournies again.

[Spartan]

Really glad we're in the man the F up phase and the pity party $hit is over. I'm not going to blast you for the FB thing because I think that's been covered. I deleted the app and stopped going on it for months while at your stage because it always got me thinking things that 9 times out of 10 weren't true.

Stop planning to look for things to do and just do it. You want to try skydiving? Drive to the airport and sign up, strap on a parachute, and jump... You won't regret it.

Tennis lessons...isn't hard to set those up.

Book reading, I'm sorry I wasn't clear but I meant more 'enjoyment' reading. Like Wonka and Bug said you can't only read self help books. Try reading a novel, a comic book, the Bible, all the above in between self help books. It's a nice diversion (well the Bible should be daily but I digress).

Do you golf? Join a league. Courses always have signups for leagues looking to fill a member or 2. Great way to meet people.

Paintball (teams always looking for members)? Salsa dancing? IDK, pick anything you have a slight interest in and sign up for something.

I know you hit the gym. Do you run? If yes find a running club and join up and start training for a half or marathon. I run a lot and one thing I find crazy is while not running runners will talk about running but once you start running you start talking about life. No choice when spending hours running together. Might just make a friend or 2.

You get my point here. Stop talking about doing things and get out there and do something. If it doesn't work try something new. You'll be amazed and how good you start to feel about yourself again. And that my friend is what's attractive to women.

[PeterV2]

Do you have any other recommendations for books?

Here's one I've found extremely helpful, and it's not even a self-help book. Stephen Mitchell's translation of the Tao Te Ching. You can read it over and over and still not get enough.

Thor, be happy, confident and clear-headed. Easy to say. Hard to do, especially in these circumstances. At least start out acting as if you're happy, confident and clear-headed. Like they say, fake it until you make it.
My WAW moved out last Nov and still has all her stuff here at home except for what she needs week to week. She still talks about our home like it our home but I'm the only one living here. I'm hoping she moves back soon, but I'm not asking her to or putting any pressure on her. A couple of months ago I casually asked her if she was going to move her stuff out and she was shocked that I asked: "What? You want me to move my stuff out?!?!" No, just wondering (argh!).
Mind reading is like a rocking chair. Lots of activity but it gets you nowhere.
Work on yourself, man. And read the Tao Te Ching.

[Ben2010]

So she has had all of her stuff at your house for 7 months??? If so thats very discouraging for me and probably Thornton too. We both have the same sitch where our W left but left all of their stuff behind. I was thinking that was a good thing and that she could only go so long without her stuff...

[Thornton]

Thanks Spartan.

I'm getting sick and tired of feeling sick and tired.

The pain I've been in is getting boring TBH.

I won't lie, I miss WAW terribly. But if she doesn't want me, there's not much I can do about that.

I want my life back. I want to feel worthy of being loved again. I can't believe how much power I've given away to WAW.

Not to be cocky but I'm an attractive, fit, intelligent guy. With a good job, good credit score, and good family. I value my relationships and I'm fiercely loyal. I deserve to be happy. I deserve someone who's willing to walk through fire and brimstone with me and face life's challenges.

I have so much to be thankful for but I've failed to realize it.

I'm thankful for:

* My faith
* My family
* My job
* My health
* My caring nature
* My dedication

I will survive this. I will become stronger. I will be happy again. And I will learn from my mistakes.

Thank you all for the kick in the pants and for caring about a struggling stranger.

Thorn

[Wonka]

My recent reading selection included books by Jodi Picoult, The Hunger Games trilogy. Just finished one of Patricia Cornwell's Kay Scarpetta books.

Nothing heavy. Just for pure entertainment value.

[Thornton]

So I'm seriously considering jumping out of an airplane.

I'm TERRIFIED of heights. $150 to jump out of a plane and scream like a 12 year old girl at a Bieber concert for 4 minutes.

The more I think about it, the more I'm leaning towards doing it. Haha! I've got butterflies now!

[Ben2010]

I dont think that I would have the B*lls to do that at all. It just seems like I would have a heart attack 10 seconds into it. I wish you the best of luck though.