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A Message from Michele
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Re: Ok here we go part two [Re: Rick1963] #2459028
06/10/14 12:59 AM
06/10/14 12:59 AM
Joined: Aug 2011
Posts: 2,900
Piney Land
R
Rick1963 Offline
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Rick1963  Offline
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Joined: Aug 2011
Posts: 2,900
Piney Land
Im going to share something. I left my 1st w for my ex. I was 22 years old. Left her with 2 young sons. My entire pay went to her until 2009. I lived in shame all this time. My sons now 29 & 27 dont want anything to do with me.... I dont blame them...you will wake up many days wondering how the kids are, what they look like, who they look like, how are they doing in school, who they hang with....You wont matter to them... when you get to my age it will matter very much to you...
I too wanted greener pastures..somehow they all dried up after awhile....


M 53
D 20
Separated 6/22/11 moved out 10/24
Together 26 yrs
Married 16
W Filed for D 7/21/11
Served 9/6/11
D final 8/28/12

“Failure is not fatal, but failure to change might be.”

John Wooden





Re: Ok here we go part two [Re: Rick1963] #2459030
06/10/14 01:08 AM
06/10/14 01:08 AM
Joined: Jun 2014
Posts: 88
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Cw_wc Offline OP
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Cw_wc  Offline OP
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Joined: Jun 2014
Posts: 88
Rick.
We've been seperated for two years. I'm not cheating. She's gone on many dates and I have a gf. We did work on the marriage. We did spend time focusing on us. But it wasn't going to happen. But I never cheated. Please be careful with your words

Last edited by Cw_wc; 06/10/14 01:17 AM.
Re: Ok here we go part two [Re: Cw_wc] #2459031
06/10/14 01:10 AM
06/10/14 01:10 AM
Joined: May 2014
Posts: 329
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Ben2010 Offline
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Ben2010  Offline
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Joined: May 2014
Posts: 329
If you have a GF now and you are only seperated, then you are cheating at the moment.


M:33
W:30
T:10 M:2
B/D: 5/27/14
S: 5/28/14
Wife moved back in 7/18/14
Re: Ok here we go part two [Re: Cadet] #2459033
06/10/14 01:15 AM
06/10/14 01:15 AM
Joined: Jun 2014
Posts: 88
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Cw_wc Offline OP
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Cw_wc  Offline OP
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Joined: Jun 2014
Posts: 88
No cadet no lies.
I think you have posted on her threads many times. She values your input.
But yes I'm positive she is in an EA. And has been for quite some time. You don't text someone daily, speak with them into the night and ask them to visit if there is nothing there.
I am good with this. I encouraged her to date during our separation and it was genuine. I encourage her still. But the whole time we spent working on us she was in a EA with a member of this forum. It was hard to repair an M when the other has moved on.

Last edited by Cw_wc; 06/10/14 01:16 AM.
Re: Ok here we go part two [Re: Ben2010] #2459035
06/10/14 01:18 AM
06/10/14 01:18 AM
Joined: Jun 2014
Posts: 88
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Cw_wc Offline OP
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Cw_wc  Offline OP
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Joined: Jun 2014
Posts: 88
No I disagree. Both my W and I have dated during the seperation. It is accepted during this time. Cheating as you call it is when one person steps out without the others knowledge of consent

Last edited by Cw_wc; 06/10/14 01:19 AM.
Re: Ok here we go part two [Re: Cw_wc] #2459047
06/10/14 01:39 AM
06/10/14 01:39 AM
Joined: Apr 2014
Posts: 1,174
Mid-Atlantic, USA
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GoatGal Offline
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GoatGal  Offline
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Joined: Apr 2014
Posts: 1,174
Mid-Atlantic, USA
I admit.
I am confused.

CW, you're saying all three...no...all FOUR of you are on this forum???

You, your wife, her BF... Wait that's three.
Is your GF on here too?

If not, she should be. Then this would get really interesting!


Anyhow. If at least three of you are here, how come all this stuff is going on?


What was your purpose in coming here?

Was it to get some insight or dig up dirt?

Because I would still help with the former.
The latter, not so much.

But I will take a clue from the vets here and STFU.

I'm curious to see how you handle it from here.


Last edited by GoatGal; 06/10/14 01:40 AM.

Me 54 Him 63
M 23 T 29
0 Kids
Funny Farm of Rescues
12/12 OW--
5/13 ILYBINILWY: A denied
9/13 Proof OW: ENDED
2/14 Got D papers on my BD
I kicked him out for my sanity
9/14 He wants to "talk"?



Re: Ok here we go part two [Re: GoatGal] #2459049
06/10/14 01:46 AM
06/10/14 01:46 AM
Joined: Apr 2014
Posts: 1,174
Mid-Atlantic, USA
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GoatGal Offline
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Posts: 1,174
Mid-Atlantic, USA
For what it's worth.
I have three male FRIENDS who I occasionally text late at night, talk to on the phone, and see on a regular basis.

They are very caring and supportive. The also know I am MARRIED.

Just having a male friend does not make it an EA.

I am not talking about, nor doing things with them I would want to hide from my husband. I am an open book.

Lately, being "separated", I have been talking to them more.
Just like I've been talking to my female friends more.

But an EA means keeping secrets because we know what we're doing has crossed the line.

Do you REALLY know your wife is in an EA?

Sounds like you are, definitely.

Decisions should be based on FACTS, not feelings.

IMHO.


Me 54 Him 63
M 23 T 29
0 Kids
Funny Farm of Rescues
12/12 OW--
5/13 ILYBINILWY: A denied
9/13 Proof OW: ENDED
2/14 Got D papers on my BD
I kicked him out for my sanity
9/14 He wants to "talk"?



Re: Ok here we go part two [Re: GoatGal] #2459060
06/10/14 02:08 AM
06/10/14 02:08 AM
Joined: Jun 2014
Posts: 88
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Cw_wc Offline OP
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Cw_wc  Offline OP
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Joined: Jun 2014
Posts: 88
Wait a minute. Wasn't I just told a few threads ago that what you just described dis an EA???

And. Sorry cause I'm laughing. My W and her om probably don't post they all have moved happily off to the alt (re facebook) where they now reside.

No my gf is not here. But she is in some ways one of us. Divorced , children and starting a new life. Now she and I speak exactly the same LL

Re: Ok here we go part two [Re: GoatGal] #2459062
06/10/14 02:09 AM
06/10/14 02:09 AM
Joined: Jun 2014
Posts: 88
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Cw_wc Offline OP
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Cw_wc  Offline OP
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Joined: Jun 2014
Posts: 88
Nope. Fact !!!

Re: Ok here we go part two [Re: Cw_wc] #2459065
06/10/14 02:18 AM
06/10/14 02:18 AM
Joined: Apr 2014
Posts: 1,174
Mid-Atlantic, USA
G
GoatGal Offline
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GoatGal  Offline
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Joined: Apr 2014
Posts: 1,174
Mid-Atlantic, USA
Game Over.


Me 54 Him 63
M 23 T 29
0 Kids
Funny Farm of Rescues
12/12 OW--
5/13 ILYBINILWY: A denied
9/13 Proof OW: ENDED
2/14 Got D papers on my BD
I kicked him out for my sanity
9/14 He wants to "talk"?



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