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nero #2421397 01/08/14 06:06 PM
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Update! I decided to handle our divorce as H is very agreeable, and we can do an uncontested divorce in NY for about $500 if we agree to all the stipulations. He insists that he wants an amicable divorce, so I went down to the county clerk while he's in a good mood, and filed on Monday. S28 served H yesterday.

An uncontested divorce filed this was is supposed to only take 4 to 12 weeks. H has told me that the Russian will be coming over here to NY for 2 weeks again this March, and that they hope that he will be able to return with her to Moscow. And Wonka -- get this -- the Russian got a new apartment and wants H to go and spackle and paint it for her. OMG! All I could think of was you predicting that when he told me, and could barely keep from laughing!

Ellie, I have been thinking about what you and FY said on my last thread, about me re-writing my marital history. I have been really really thinking about the past 38 years. And FY, no, it truly WAS like that. My H and I loved each other, still love each other, and had a mostly normal, happy marriage for 33 years with the normal ups and downs (these past 5 MLC years have been a killer, but that was due to the MLC). My H made me feel loved, but he never made me feel beloved. There is a difference, I know, because I cherished him.

I don't know if I will ever have another relationship, but if so, it will be with someone who will cherish me. Who will actually be interested in what I have to say and will think I'm swell! Maybe that sounds conceited or something, but I'd rather live alone than be under a man's thumb ever again. And Ellie, dating a man 7 years younger! You are my hero, and role model, you give me hope!

I have my next eye surgery this evening, hopefully the last one. My surgeon says that this laser surgery "works" in most of cases like mine, where the lens replacement failed, but if not, he'll be taking me back to the operating room. AND he says that it is just younger patients who needed a lens implant for some reason who develop this problem, which made me feel good until I realized most of his patients are probably 80! I will have to wear those stupid cataract glasses again that make me look like the human fly. But hopefully this will be the end of 5 months of living with blurred vision. Prayers would be appreciated.


Linda

Me 65, Ex 64
M 38 y
2 adult S, 4 G-Kids
MLC 11/07
BD 12/09
D 3/14
Dating nice guy 7/14
Engaged to nice guy 12/17
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Quote:
And Ellie, dating a man 7 years younger! You are my hero, and role model, you give me hope!


Hahaha - he's the second-closest to my age of all the men I dated after my divorce! wink

kml #2421407 01/08/14 06:23 PM
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I wish the forum had a "like" button LOL! A "love it" button !! smile


Linda

Me 65, Ex 64
M 38 y
2 adult S, 4 G-Kids
MLC 11/07
BD 12/09
D 3/14
Dating nice guy 7/14
Engaged to nice guy 12/17
kml #2421408 01/08/14 06:24 PM
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(And he looks about 35, because he works out all the time and is totally buff smile )

kml #2421414 01/08/14 06:38 PM
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well you look about 35 too, so you're equal!

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RL,
Good luck w/your surgery today. I hope that your vision is corrected this time for you. It's been a long, bothersome road for you.

As for your h, I about died laughing about the new apartment, spackling, etc. RT has her own slave and he's too stupid to see what she's doing, i.e., using him for all he's worth. Gotta love it and yet feel sorry for the man because life as he knew it will never be the same.

Please take care of yourself.


Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to.
The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
job #2421473 01/08/14 08:16 PM
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Linda,

Wow....what a sea change from a few months ago when you worried yourself sick about H flying to Russia!

Honey, I give H and RT 3 months in Moscow before he comes back to the States with the tail under his legs. Too funny! Again, enforce your boundary of not having the RT come near your house or step inside it when she comes to the States in March. Make sure this is spelled out clearly to H.

I can't imagine having your own son serving H with the papers. Crazy!! What they must feel about this latest development from loopy-doopy de do H?

Hope the surgery is a success this time around for you. smile

Wonka #2421482 01/08/14 08:33 PM
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RL, good luck with your surgery. You sound good. So, did he move out?

I am with Wonka, I will give it about 3 months too.


M:50
H:52
S28 (my S from previous marriage)
M:17 + 3
BD: 06/12
S: 06/12 - H works in another state
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Wow Rl. I can't believe what I just read. Add a tally mark for me too under Wonka's prediction. I'm not even sure they will make it 3 months. Where is he getting all of this money for travel? I hope you're not paying for it.

Count me in too for a prayer that your surgery goes well. This is going to be a good year for your RL. You deserve it.

Finally, you will find someone who will cherish you because you deserve it. Even when H was not nice you showed him that you would not stoop to his level. Settle for nothing less. I am convinced there are wonderful people out there looking for people just like all of us.

Good luck tonight!!!


M 48 H 50
M 25 T 27
D 20,18,15
6/11 H filed
3/12 H dropped
4/12 H moved out
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That was just beautiful. What else to say? You simply must write a book about your experience! I'd read it, and it would be so inspirational to the many who find themselves in similar situations. You have such a way with words.


~
MH
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