Oh dear, my old thread locked up. Sorry Job! Thank you all for your replies; I will try to consolidate them in a post soon. But in the meanwhile, here is my song for my new thread, a song that Portia and I have been singing about our selves, right Portia?
My new mantra: "I'm saving all my loving for someone who's loving me" and with whom I do NOT have to STFU!
"I will Survive"
It took all the strength I had not to fall apart Just trying hard to mend the pieces of my broken heart
And I spent oh so many nights just feeling sorry for myself I used to cry but now I hold my head up high And you see in me, somebody new I'm not that chained up little person still in love with you And so you felt like dropping in and just expect me to be free but now I'm saving all my loving for someone who's loving me
Oh now go, walk out the door Just turn around now cause you're not welcome anymore Weren't you the one who tried to break me with goodbye? Did you think I'd crumble? Did you think I'd lay down and die?
Oh no not I, I will survive Oh as long as I know how to love I know I'll stay alive I've got all my life to live and I've got all my love to give and I'll survive...I will survive
Happy new year. I too have been reading up and have been very inspired by your bravery and positive attitude.
Hugs and love to you
TPS Me: 44 H: 42 M14 T17 S10 D7 10/10 H moves out after death of his father-same month 21/04/12 H is 'DONE' 04/05/12 OW/PA confirmed (rumors from 2010) July '14 H ends affair May '15 H moves back home
Who would of thought that would be my song some 30 yrs ago,but it has helped me so so much since I have been on this journey, I read here alot dont post much but just had to let you know this song is so on the money for me...... So sorry you find yourself in here after all those years of marriage,but my Mom had a saying in spanish "nadien se va de esta vida sin pagar lo que se debe........and I have seen it time and time again. Basically it means no oneleaves this earth without gettingpaid back for the wrongs that they have done
Linda, you're going to do great. You made a tough decision, but you took the time to think it through and state your boundaries.
Your h is crazy right now and not thinking clearly. Let him figure out how to get to Russia and take care of himself. As a fellow "fixer", I understand that you want to make sure he has a place to stay, etc., but he made his choice and he needs to deal with the consequences.
You are so very strong and all of us are here for you. And just think how great it'll be to come home and not have to worry what some crazy guy is up to in your living room. And no more booties or disgusting food in the kitchen!
M36 XH34 M-5 T7 4/11 H confused 5/11 ILYB 6/11 OW discovered 7/11 I move out, OW over 5/12-OW2,done->new EA, but H wont file 9/12 H "best bf ever" to EA/OW3 3/13 H/OW break up H files 4/13 D 6/18/13
Oh Linda, I know you have thought long and hard about this. Your H was not nice to you and I know you have given this your all. I just caught up on your thread and it seems as though a lot happened in a short amount of time.
I am in the same situation except H is filing this month. Things just are not getting better and everything is still my fault. He is ready to file again and I am ready as well. The holidays were still very tough.
I am still committed to not date until the divorce is done. I just feel it is the right thing. I think because if anything should happen and my h would wake up I don't know what I would do so I think it is just better this way.
I am still baffled how your H thinks an r with RT will work. I agree with someone above that to her, he is only good for a green card. I also can't understand what he saw appealing his last trip to russia but they are not normal right now.
You are a very strong woman with so many of us that are here for you. I know you will be fine and someday you will find someone that will appreciate you. That is what I believe. This is all part of God's big plan.
I think it will be difficult for both of us at first because we both have long marriages, mine not as long as yours but still long.
This was a tough decision for you but I have so much faith that you will be just fine. I'm so proud of you for how you have handled yourself throughout.
I hope you take the help that your friends offer you. My friends in my town have been wonderful. Many of them having gone through similar situations and know that I gave it my all.
Hugs to you Linda!!
M 48 H 50 M 25 T 27 D 20,18,15 6/11 H filed 3/12 H dropped 4/12 H moved out
