AT, so good to hear from you! It's been a while. I hope life is rolling along merrily for you these days. Hey, do you still have those ashes in your drawer lol?
I donated the ashes to the local Farmer's Co-op a few years ago. From what I have been told there was a sudden increase in size of the iceburg lettuce heads that they have been producing since 2011. Who would have thought ?
Don't comment often, but can so relate to a crazy ex. Hate that the kids have to face this reality and I just try to give mine the tools to deal with it and be awesome in spite of his insanity. Keep on keeping on...you are a great role model for her!
thanks for you input, butterfly! Today, I tried this assertiveness thing. It's not something I do often and was raised to believe I really didn't have the right to stand up for my needs. I'm often easy to convince that I am wrong and seeing things incorrectly. Today I stood up for myself. For the past 20 years I have worked with someone I shall call "the slug". He's the laziest, most unmotivated person I have ever worked with. His major undertakings in the workplace are internet surfing and trying to get into the pants of any female co-worker/student who is under 25. He's also a bit of a bully and will fight back against any supervisor who even hints at his ineptitude. So, what happens it that they placate and pander to him which sometimes can become just darn irritating! This week a co-worker went on vacation and her duties needed to be covered. I was assigned 2.5 extra hours of duties and the slug got 15 minutes. So yesterday I went to the slug and asked if this was his understanding of the assignments...and it was. I wanted to give him the opportunity to step up and take something off my plate which, of course, he didn't. I told him I would address this with the supervisor. So today, before our staff meeting the supervisor, myself and the slug were in the board room together before others arrived. I thought this would be a good time as it would be private and no one would lose face. I stated my concern and what changes I wanted to see in the assignments. The slug started rolling his eyes and said "Oh sure, give me more work" and the supervisor began lecturing me on how sometimes everyone has to do more than someone else blah blah blah. So once more I repeated what I wanted as an outcome. Finally, she agreed and the slug got an extra hour of my workload. He reponded with "just wait till I get an extra half hour added on, I'll be sure to bring it up" I responded "that's fine" and then thanked them both for their co-operation. I have to remember that when you challenge the status quo there will be a reaction. It was ridiculous, they were trying to tell me I was being petty, unreasonable and selfish. In my mind, this was so blatant even I couldn't be convinced I was wrong lol! So the slug sulked for the rest of the day and I carried on. That's my day so far!
Oh, and the slug, he had a yearly review recently where it was discovered that he hadn't done a mandated client assessment in over six months! He cried about how swamped he is and so they decreased his workload...I'm not kidding!
Holy cow! That kind of thing just ticks me the heck off! How do people get away with not doing their job and then whine and cry about how 'hard' they work and how overloaded they are and do even less work?
No really, how? I would love to learn this trick and use it just once!
Seriously though, I'm glad to see you go against your nature and stand up for yourself! Well done!
T19 M15 S19 XH47 M43 bomb12/4/07 PA5/07 S12/26/07 D final 11/17/08 Back together with no defined R 05/2010 confused....to say the least!!!
To be fair, the slug did have some redeeming qualities which were squashed out of him by our beloved boss many moons ago. After finding a female co-worker crying in her office after being blasted by the boss lady (and this was not the first time) he went to the bosses office and told her she couldn't treat people like sh!t and she responded "I'm the boss, I can do whatever I want". She then proceeded to ride his ass for at least a year. As his union steward and Local President I asked for explanation as to what was happening and the boss threatened to lay a grievance against me for violation of the collective agreement. She believed that a memo rather than a face to face request was a violation of the CA. What a weinie! Anyway, since then the slug has used this as a reason to do absolutely nothing for anyone, client, colleague or management. But, he basically has worn them down over the years with his persistent whining and complaining etc and they now pander to him so they don't have to deal with his behaviour. Pretty much everything he does or, more appropriately, does not do is overlooked. Anyway, that's a lengthy and probably unnecessary explanation lol.
Wii - I deal with a similar situation at my office as well. I have a co-worker who has the same job title as I do, makes the same amount of money and does hardly anything. I work my a$$ off and he simply just gets paid. Very frustrating but at least I have the satisfaction of know that I at least earn the pay I get!
The worst part is that they get pandered to! I'm a relatively hard working and motivated employee who is getting shafted with 3.5 extra hours of duties (2.5 was a miscalculation on my part!) and both the boss and him sit there telling me that I'm being unreasonable! Basically the message is don't rock our boat. It's so bizarre! Actually, the slug once said "the less you do around here the better you get treated" so there's method to his laziness lol.
This sounds like a real life case of Office Space! Just avoid the Bobs...
Seriously, the slug sounds like a real downer in your office. I can't imagine how I'd feel to constantly have to DB that mess. Good for you for speaking up for yourself.
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
but at least I have the satisfaction of know that I at least earn the pay I get!