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Three weeks into summer and things are going well. Had the girls 14 of the past 19 days. I love summer.

D15's job is going well. She's more than halfway to her savings goal for next summer's trip to Europe. As far as I can tell she likes the job and they like her and since it's seasonal and doesn't interfere with theater it could be the job that carries her through high school.

She ended up with a 3.7 in her second semester and a 3.8 for her freshman year. Next year she'll have four honors classes. So all those things are going well.

She had her choir camp last week at a Wisconsin college and she graded it an 8. She got into a dispute at the camp with the only other girls there from her high school. These two used to be friends but this girl apparently is jealous that D15 got lead parts in the plays this year. It caught D15 off guard and she didn't know how to keep the thing from escalating.

For the next four weeks her theater schedule heats up so she'll basically either be rehearsing or working. Not a lot of down time for D15.

With that schedule, I've actually had a lot more alone time with D11. We went to the City Museum in St. Louis and to Lit Fest in Chicago. She's had three different friends over. I don't have my uncle's house for swimming -- he's too old and decided not to open it -- so we've had to go to the beach and the water park. D11 liked having her "own" pool, so it's been an adjustment.

Last night D11 admitted she didn't want to go back to XW's house. She had a bad meltdown last week that at least in part was from XW just being too stressed.

It's exactly what I thought would happen. XW has a one-month old who sleeps a lot so D11 has to be quiet. She can't run around or be loud. If she wakes the baby she gets yelled at. That's very, very tough for D11. She's a bundle of energy on her worst days. Here, it's just the three of us.

D11 also doesn't like the fact that biker guy lives there all the time now and they have to interact a lot more with this other family.

She asked for my advice and I said there isn't much to give other than eventually the baby will get bigger and not sleep as much and she'll "get used to" having the other guy around. My mom married three times. I never liked it, but what could I do about it.

I won't see them again until July 5. Then things speed up. July 5 through July 9 we'll be at a cottage on Lake Michigan with the professor and her daughter. I'm a little nervous about the trip. No internet so they'll have to be off their devices. Plus, D11 and the professor's daughter aren't friendly. They are very different. But it's a big house and we'll have two cars so they can go their separate ways and there's lots of things to do in three days.

Two weeks after that D15 has her play then we use my timeshare for a couple of days in Wisconsin.

Then two weeks after that I have a birthday party for D11 at the water park and we then fly to Washington D.C. I've never been to D.C. I'm probably more excited than they are.

Then two weeks after that -- school.

Still with the professor. With the crazy schedules we find ways to see each other. Dinner tonight downtown while her daughter was with her father. I still don't see happily ever after, but I'm not looking for anyone else. Taking it a day at a time.

Money issues OK. Got a lot of work done on the book for the developer and that with the umpiring money should carry me through the summer. Things will get tight in August and September, but I'll be OK come October. It's still a crazy but now predictable schedule.

Really not much to complain about.


Me: 47, Ds 17-13, D final 6-11
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Happy 4th of July

Not my year to have girls on the 4th. They'll be here first thing in the morning -- after 10 days at the other house -- and we leave to spend five days with the professor and her daughter.

It'll be an interesting trip. It doesn't look like it'll be too hot so we'll have to find things to do other than swim.

As always when it's the five of us the key will be whether her daughter will interact with my D11. If she doesn't I think D11 and I will just go off and do our own thing.

I think it'll be fine -- a little bumpy at first -- but fine overall.

Low key fourth for me. Got up in the morning and ran a 2-mile race run every Fourth. Ran it in 17:35. That's not awful.

Mowed the yard. Worked on developer's book. Then went to lunch with the professor and her daughter. They are coming to get me in about 40 minutes for dinner and fireworks.

I'm starting to pack. There's five weeks of summer left and we're on vacation for three of them.

I might even have a final answer on my second-job gap from mid-July to December. I may get hooked up with another guy who runs youth baseball tournaments in August and September. If I can make money umpiring into September then I'm basically set for the year.


Me: 47, Ds 17-13, D final 6-11
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Coming back to the board for a while. Lots of changes in last six months. Lost my journalism job after nearly 17 years in August after getting back from vacation.

It was a long time coming. Lack of raises since 2008 and no place to be promoted to just sapped my motivation. I was burned out and sticking around because of the four weeks of vacation.

Got hired by a financial firm in November, passed my Series 7 and Series 66 and then went out knocking on doors to find clients. That lasted five weeks. The amount of Saturdays and holidays it was going to take to make a go of it would have severely cut back on the 40 percent of the time I have with my daughters. When I talked with the company about the work/life balance they essentially said "tough" and well, that was that.

So I've been looking for work for three weeks. There are some things in the fire.

And today the professor broke up with me after 2 1/2 years. It was a long time coming as well, but still I'm sad. There were a lot of things about her that were perfect for me ... still, I never ever felt the way I did for XW way back in the day.

When the relationship was easy, it was good, it was fun. Then over time it got complex. Finally, she said she wanted more from me and I wasn't going to give it.

So it's a tough time for me. I'm sad, a little relieved but also nervous about trudging back into the dating world.

D16 is staying the night at a friend's house. D12 has a friend over. I'm not going to tell them about the professor for a while. They liked her. The professor's 12-year-old daughter didn't like mine and that was a huge source of attention. But my daughters liked the professor.


Me: 47, Ds 17-13, D final 6-11
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So changes that needed to happen were changed for you. Never easy but look at as a time for new opportunities. I think your job as a financial advisor must have been for the company I work for. You have to put the time in at the beginning and then it all balances out, it isn't for everyone. Since you have your licenses, you could always try another place that may have a different approach that might suit you better. You could also get in with a vendor that sells mutual funds or insurance if that is something that interests you.

Next dating opportunity, please don't compare her to your ex. That is all based on a bit of a fantasy anyway since she wasn't really everything you thought she was to begin with. Secondly, if you call her the professor on here, I doubt that you were thinking of her in a sexy way in real life. Try not to lable and see where that gets you.

Good luck, kat


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Don't date for awhile...take some time off.


Divorced February 27, 2012.

"Only by love is love awakened".~ Ellen G White
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Five positive things today.

1) Saw both daughters after school. 2) Got monthly check from my sister for doing the books for her business. 3) Got my 10,000 Fitbit steps in for the day. 4) Applied for a banking job. 5) Paid down Capital One bill.

A couple of years ago I took a class on grant writing and it would be perfect for me. It is hard though to break into unless you find an organization to bring you on and train you.

Two weeks ago, I interviewed at an economic development group looking to expand. There, I would get grant writing training. The interview went well, but now the organization needs to get board approval to bring me on.

So I'm in a waiting game. I can always apply at another brokerage, but honestly money is not my God. I'm more interested in flexibility for my family. The economic development group said I'd know for sure in four to eight weeks.


Me: 47, Ds 17-13, D final 6-11
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I will second what Kat & WII said. Calling her "Professor" was offensive to the rest of us. And don't date for a while.

Good luck on the job front. I think you are highly motivated & that will get you places.

Barb

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Can't really date since I don't have a job. I'd be the cliche, jobless loser looking for sugar mama. smile

I never saw calling her the professor as derogatory. How many guys have things for hot teachers?


Me: 47, Ds 17-13, D final 6-11
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http://tiny.cc/thread2
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http://tinyurl.com/thread6
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Five positive things for today.

1) Saw both my daughters after school today. Always No. 1.
2) Found out I will get second interview with board members of the organization I'm dying to get hired by. I know most of the board members. This is a really good thing.
3) Had testy exchange with D12 in car over an art assignment. After a few exchanges, I backed off and moved on to other things. By end of car ride, she'd circled back to it and agreed she should handle things differently.
4) Met with a community center to help them with two more United Way grants. The center paid me $300 for the first one and it took just five hours of work. So this is a good start.
5) Had good, long talk with friend who moved 90 minutes away. May visit him this weekend if nothing materializes here for the weekend.


Me: 47, Ds 17-13, D final 6-11
http://tinyurl.com/yk4e2tz
http://tiny.cc/thread2
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http://tinyurl.com/3sm78k6
http://tinyurl.com/thread6
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Things sound really good. Keep those positives going!


T19 M15 S19 XH47 M43
bomb12/4/07
PA5/07
S12/26/07
D final 11/17/08
Back together with no defined R 05/2010
confused....to say the least!!!

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