It almost sounds like she just wants to be difficult for the sake of being difficult.
This is the reality of the situation W is being difficult.
We both went to the bank and arranged a loan for £45k for me to purchase her equity,£45K which was stretching me to the limit but I was gonna give it a go. Then she wanted £200/mth CS well I can't afford that I said we'll both have houses so we should share custody, but she wasn't having that she wanted regular money from me on top of £45k.
So I said enoughs enough we'll have to sell. I wanted to borrow the smaller amount but this is linked to the mortgage and needs W to co sign and she won't do that.
She can't afford to keep the house but she doesn't want me to have it that's her mentality.
So as you say I'm weighing up the pros and cons and seeing what my options are.
Mediation between W and I broke down, negotiation between our representatives broke down mainly because I wasn’t giving W all she was asking for.
So W has applied for, and been granted a court hearing date in February to sort out our financial arrangements. Ie all things are put before a judge and he makes a the decision. All financial statements and budgets need to be lodged with the courts by January 22nd . My solicitor has advised me that her representation will cost me around £5k. (That’s £5k I haven’t got).
Just feels like W is out to screw me financially as she’s not accepted or agreed anything with me in mediation, that with current fees has already cost me £2k. I mean we haven’t got much to fight over other than the equity of the house but it looks like W is trying to minimise my share even if it means losing out herself.
So bottom line is we will most likely be ordered to sell the house (at a loss) at the hearing in Feb and the divorce will be made final sometime after that.
Today I have 3 Estate agents booked, I really don't like dealing with those people (apologies if you're in that business), one of them tells me she's already got people lined up for viewings, Noo... I'm not at that stage yet, I just need a valuation.
Tomorrow I'll cancel the £45k loan which was approved to buy out W share of the equity, if I don't cancel they will automatically transfer the money to my account January 8th.No can't afford to pay for that.
Then I'll get to work on the documents I need to submit to courts by Jan 27th. However I won’t let any of this spoil my new years celebrations.
Hey Lan how are you doing? Happy New Year! Are you getting there with the paperwork? I read you have to have everything finished to the courts by end of this month? When is the court date set in February? How is the little one?
Hello, I've not posted here for a while, I'm more active on a different MLC site. But the latest is we are still not divorced yet.
Was in court February for the First Direction Appointment (FDR). The purpose of this hearing is to decide what more information both parties, and the court needs, before negotiations start properly . Agreed were the points to be negotiated over.
• House value for negotiation purposes • House disposition (buy out STBXW at certain value or sell) • Pension order (STBXW has staked her claim on my pension) • Custody arrangement (I have made application for 50:50 sharing)
The whole thing has cost me £££ and we are not really any further forward but I'm trying not to let it get me down.
STBXW and her solicitors seem to think I have a secret stash of money. (Yeah right).
STBXW has these few small savings accounts “which she didn’t think she needed to declare” we have asked for details of those. Also we need to know where the missing £2K form an account she did declare .
Custody and what percentages of the house sale to go to STBXW are very much down to D12. If she wants to live with STBXW then she gets a bigger cut of the money, If D wants to live 50:50 then thats how the money will be split, god forbid if she says she wants to live with me, I think STBXW would have heart failure (if she has one).
On my pension the total value is actually £200k however £70k was accrued before I met STBXW so we will argue she is entitled to a max of 50% of £130k.
Other than that we’re back in court April 27th day to discuss details unless thing can be agreed before then.
In the meantime we still live in the same house under a tense atmosphere but I mostly stay out of here way and she continues to go out with her "Friend" at the weekend but now spends the whole night instead of slinking back in the wee hours. She won't move out and I can't force her out.
Anyway thanks to all that take an interest and show concern.
I am fully divorced now, my house is the process of being sold xW gets 65% of the proceeds (as ordered by the courts) I get 35%, but I get to keep all my pension rights she can’t touch that. I have also found a smaller house for me, so the proceeds from my house acts as my deposit. D12 will stay with me part time but custody has not been finalised .
Originally Posted By: lanzo
In the meantime we still live in the same house under a tense atmosphere but I mostly stay out of here way and she continues to go out with her "Friend" at the weekend but now spends the whole night instead of slinking back in the wee hours. She won't move out and I can't force her out.
All of this is the same until house sales are completed sometime in July.
