I visit here from time to time to catch up with what's going on with everyone. I would agree with Mr.Bond. Just apply the principles to the new R and things should be good.
Otherwise, I am so happy to see that you are happy! It does often feel like being on the other side makes all the prior pain worth it. No pain, no gain I guess could be applied here too
It's like a whole new life is opening up for you.
How's the health activities? Does your new love do much in terms of exercise?
Things are going well on my end too. I can honestly say that the principles here have continued to help me as I apply them. When I slip a for a couple of weeks, I start to sense a sliding down and I realise I need to inject more attention and care. It doesn't take long to recover the loving feeling after that. So, my experience is that as long as one pays attention, a relationship can be very loving and caring and secure etc., as long as effort and attention is given to it. I suppose that's with all things in life.
My course is almost complete. I have a month or so left, and assessments are this week. We will have results in June. I admit is has been a challenge to keep my R balanced together with end of term work - and I'm fortunate that my H has been patient (though I think his patience is wearing thin). Most of my time and attention is on the final work, and then finding a job. So, every so often I have to come out of my tunnel vision and pay attention to him.
Hi Yankee, I haven't been in here in a long time, so sorry for not responding until now. I'm sorry for not being able to be on here in ages as well.
I'm glad that things are going well for you Yankee, you really hung in there and are seeing the benefits of it all now.
Updates of where I'm up to...
As of 19th of July 2013 I was officially divorced. I know that so many people's goal on here is to avoid this at all cost, but for me it represents closure to an unhappy relationship and transitional period in my life.
If people don't know my back story, my wife cheated on me with an older man and we couldn't save the marriage.
I qualified as a teacher this month and have managed to get my first teaching job working in a special needs school.
My new relationship is going so well. She really challenges me and I'm so happy.
When my bombshells were dropped I was a major mess and a lot of great people on here talked sense into me and helped me get back on my feet.
If you are a newbie on here and you think your world has come to an end, that's exactly what I thought when my bombs were dropped. Trust me it's not the end of your world. It is the end of your old relationship with your husband or wife.
This site helps you to save yourself, nobody saves their marriage the way it was, some people make a new relationship with their husband or wife.
Your first step is to realise that your life / relationship with your partner is messed up and that your first goal is to fix yourself.
Fix yourself and life will take care of the rest for you (well maybe not everything, you need specific goals and Michelle's books and this forum to help you along the way).
Don't give up on yourself, no matter how bad you think things are, they will get better.
Me 34 W 32 D 9 S 6 M: 9 years T: 12 Bomb: 02/11/12 EA/PA: 12/17/11 - ongoing Moved out: Oct 2012 Joint Filed for D: 2/11/13