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#2146935 04/14/11 03:33 AM
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 676
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Posts: 676
I remember my sister ringing me from London and saying
'Hey there is this cool site that will help you "

I was in the depths of dispair, depressed just immobile.

I had, had an affair, then lied about it, minimised it... you name it, all the text book rantings of a snapped infidale wife.

He left, came back, moved in and moved out and I did everything I thought i could to save my marriage and more importantly, my family. All the wrong things. Then i found there was another woman.

The heartache was real. i was physically ill, my eyes were lifeless, the weight fell off me and I stumbled around looking for help.

This site was it. I posted and read and hoped and prayed. I did everything I thought was right. i bought the books. I realised it was okay to get help and I took the anti depressants prescribed and I GAL.

Well it took 2 - 3 years but i am here to tell you that i am happy. I never saved my marriage and I still cry for the loss of what could of been good if treated when the symptons got to the point where i felt i had nothing to loose in the arms of another man. I am sad for my kids that now have to consider the feelings of 2 individuals and not the family as a whole. BUT i believe through my healing and there pain comes there belief that no matter what happens in life, you can survive. They got strength.

If i could turn back the clock i still would. I dont speak to my x - he is still angry. He lives with the OW and his kids have barely anything to do with him. Terrible loss for both parties and I hope that , that will change.

The divorce was ugly but neccessary.

But today I am happy. i have done things that I would never of done inside a marriage and thety have been good character building things. i feel more alive than ever before and I feel my possibilities are both endless and mine.

everyone can get to this point. Trust and believe it and work at new things - other words GAL. It works.

Joined: Jun 2009
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Hi P,

This site was my life the summer of 2009. I got up and spent hours here looking for insights. I knew pretty quickly my marriage was probably over and a year later I was divorced.

May 23 will be the 2 year mark of him leaving for the OW and the beginning of lies, lies, lies. My life is so rich, so full, so fun that I love every day. In my case, I would not change one single thing. I needed to have my world rocked for me to grow and change. I now have the friends and the life I was always meant to have. I can look in the mirror and say I am happy to be where I am. Yes, it takes time and it's worth every ounce of pain. And, I remember the depths of despair and the sheer agony of losing my marriage.

Like you, I am happy and continue to do things I never thought possible. Yes, our journeys have just begun....

All the best to you!!


Me 55
H 49
Married 21 years
No kids
bomb 5/09
filed 7/09
divorced and moving forward 5/10

Life is all about Plan B
Joined: Sep 2005
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thanks for your post! to those of you hurting know that you can and will overcome this valley of death, that you will come on stronger... ifyou choose, that you can become a better person... if you let go and forgive... I never throught there would be day I wouldnt' think of the "ow" for one minute, didn't think I could live one more week. month without him... and like my gals up there, I love my life, I have grown as a woman, I can do things I couldnt' before, I discover myself and as my sig. says, I do have peace in my heart.


Be not afraid...I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten Joel2

30something
2kids
survivor of S, MLC, A, D
I have peace in my heart, at last.
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 676
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I was just thinking, that i thoght i would never think of the other woman without feeling ill and sick and lots of other ghastly feelings but now I either dont think about them or feel kind of sorry for them. He ( x) has lost the day to day living with his kids, his family home , his future as a being part of a whole family.

I would not trade place and believe me I NEVER thought io would feel this way.

Like other s i looked for the success stories or anything to give me hope. I never came to this forum but if anyone does see this who is feeling like liife is over , then I hope this helps. PROMISE


Moderated by  Cadet, DnJ, job, Michele Weiner-Davis 

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