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Joined: Sep 2006
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Well, while I'm here I might as well post something about myself.

Less than a week till xmas now. I have DD through xmas and I'm not sure if I should invite STBXW over on xmas. My first reaction is no because at least for the first year she should feel the consequences of her decisions. On second thought though, it's more about DD, it would be nice for her to open her presents with mom there too. Then again it's obvious STBXW doesn't care about DD as much as I give her credit for it or else she wouldn't have given up on us. So in the end if STBX doesn't join us for xmas it's more a loss for DD than STBXW really. Then again, I can't give DD a lot of what's missing from her life now no matter how much I try, so it's also the reality of the situation. I guess we'll celebrate xmas separately acknowledging the things that are missing or are different...just like we do in our day to day lives now.


Me: 35|WAW: 38|D: 6yo | http://tinyurl.com/2dxx7m6
Feb 2006, left, came back in two weeks
Aug 2006, left again
Apr 2007, filed for divorce
Dec 2007, reunited
Mar 2010, moved out, filed again
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IR-- sadly, your daughter will need to adjust to having 2 separate Christmases because you will be divorced soon. Do you think it would confuse her or do you think she "gets" it?
Mom and Dad together doesn't mean Mom and Dad are getting back together.

I see by the end of your stream of thoughts that you decided to keep it separate and that is best, IMO.

Out of curiosity, were you with your stbxW on Christmas 06? I see in your sig that she left in August of that year but it also looks like you may have spent 07-10 together for Christmas.


me,34
exH,34
S,16 months
S:3/31/09-left for OW
started DBing 10/09
d final: sometime 10/10
current:
http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2022856&page=1
met in 2004

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NM, thanks. That's about how I see it too.

Yes we always celebrated the past Christmases together because I wanted to reconcile with her. I had hopes that we would get past the rough patch in life and things will be all good again. Well I guess I was right except not realizing that it never works when the other person's not committed 100%. So, this time I concede there's no way to fix this oil spill grin


Me: 35|WAW: 38|D: 6yo | http://tinyurl.com/2dxx7m6
Feb 2006, left, came back in two weeks
Aug 2006, left again
Apr 2007, filed for divorce
Dec 2007, reunited
Mar 2010, moved out, filed again
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Posts: 6,948
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Yes indeed...someone asked on piecing how to know when you actually are piecing, and the response I liked best basically said when the person who left is 'all in' and committed to working on things. No dragging feet or pulling teeth!

Whatever works best for you guys, that's what you should do. We are doing Christmas morning/Santa together and I plan to do that as long as my kids still believe... but he gets them Christmas Eve and I get them Christmas Day.


Me-35

Together: 18 yrs
M-12.5 yrs
S-8
D-4
D'd: Feb. 2010

The LORD your God is with you,
he is mighty to save. --Zeph. 3:17
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yeah I guess we all have different tolerances for being with our ex spouses...I can attend a dr. appt with him, tour daycares, but then think "divorced people don't share Christmas together"

To each his own, IR. Do what you want! smile


me,34
exH,34
S,16 months
S:3/31/09-left for OW
started DBing 10/09
d final: sometime 10/10
current:
http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2022856&page=1
met in 2004

Joined: May 2006
Posts: 1,583
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Romeo - she doesn't deserve to sit with you and your daughter to open presents. She gave that up when she decided you guys weren't a family anymore.


M44 H41
M20 T23
3 older teens
Bomb Nov 09 "i'm not happy"
EA Nov 09 w/coworker
Another PA in Mar 10
I Filed Apr 10
D final Dec 10
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Hope yours was a Merry Christmas, Romeo smile


Me: 29
Got a ticket to the D concert
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Happy New Year!!! Thanks for stopping by.

kat


Me-53(and learning!)
S24, S21, D18, D17
Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
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Looking at your new profile pic, I had to laugh at her being a tire gauge. What when you see that the *** isn't in the tread any more, time to change the tires??!!! LOL

kat


Me-53(and learning!)
S24, S21, D18, D17
Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
Joined: Sep 2006
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Exactly kat, see great minds think alike...and replay the image over and over again grin

But you tell me about the effectiveness...you're the owner, I'm just a customer lol


Me: 35|WAW: 38|D: 6yo | http://tinyurl.com/2dxx7m6
Feb 2006, left, came back in two weeks
Aug 2006, left again
Apr 2007, filed for divorce
Dec 2007, reunited
Mar 2010, moved out, filed again
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