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Coach #2071416 09/07/10 06:45 PM
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Unfortunately my phone doesn't even have a camera, but my project for this evening is to get my small digital voice recorder working again. I don't think I can legally record her secretly, but next time she wants to fight I'll take it out, turn in on, set it on the table between us and ask her what she would like to discuss.

Have to check with my L first.


Me 42, W 39, S8, S6, S2
M 11y, A & ILYBNILWY 11/08
Walking away from a bad situation.

My Sitch

Strength and Compassion
No Resentment
Coach #2071722 09/08/10 03:36 AM
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Hi Thinker,
Just catching back up after lots of time at 'recess.'

Sounds like you've spent plenty of time in self-reflection, etc. and are ready to get back out there and have fun again. You certainly deserve it and I wish the best for you. Happy dating!


Me 55
H 49
Married 21 years
No kids
bomb 5/09
filed 7/09
divorced and moving forward 5/10

Life is all about Plan B
Golfgirl1 #2071879 09/08/10 01:48 PM
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Thanks Golfgirl!

I have a date tonight, and am looking forward to it! smile


Me 42, W 39, S8, S6, S2
M 11y, A & ILYBNILWY 11/08
Walking away from a bad situation.

My Sitch

Strength and Compassion
No Resentment
Thinker #2074171 09/11/10 03:43 AM
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Just got an email from her, via her L and my L, accusing me of escalating and harassing her in order to frighten her out of the home. My supposed actions include to include recording her, hacking her computer, installing key loggers, etc.

None of which I have done (at least in the past 19 months since I used a key logger to bust her A in January 2008 wink )

But in her mind, I am now doing all of these things in order to harass and punish her (her words, not mine)

She's whacked!


Me 42, W 39, S8, S6, S2
M 11y, A & ILYBNILWY 11/08
Walking away from a bad situation.

My Sitch

Strength and Compassion
No Resentment
Thinker #2074174 09/11/10 04:05 AM
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She is reading your posts my friend - you were just discussing recording her, and now she's accusing you of recording her?

kml #2074253 09/11/10 12:27 PM
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No, because I was talking about starting to record her openly if when she rages. She is claiming that I have been secretly recording her for a while now.


Me 42, W 39, S8, S6, S2
M 11y, A & ILYBNILWY 11/08
Walking away from a bad situation.

My Sitch

Strength and Compassion
No Resentment
Thinker #2075874 09/14/10 01:02 PM
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Stbx Mrs. T and I have found a C for our kids - someone they can talk to about all of the divorce related stress in their lives. Yesterday we had to meet (the two of us) with the C as an intro.

Holy Distortions Batman!

It's true to her pattern and her character, but she has completely rewritten our past to suit her own view of herself.
  • It's all my fault.
  • The affairs never happened (those relationships she had and continues to have with other men aren't "Affairs").
  • The defining stress in the kids life is the single time I got angry 12 months ago.
  • The daily anger she exhibits is all because of me.
  • The frequent times she blows up at the kids are all becaue of the stress I put her under.
  • The fact that she ignores the boys all day when they are with her (on the phone with her friends and boyfriends) is because she doesn't have enough support.
  • The expense that we have from the lawyers, etc, is all my fault because I was the one who filed
  • ...


Aaaahhhhrghhh!! Get me out of this fun house!

I keep the time I am around her to an absolute minimum and this helps keep me sane, but occasionally we have to interract for the D or the kids. Whenever we do I feel like I am in a maze of mirrors where the mirrors distorts my own reflection back in all sorts of bizarre and disturbing ways.

I just want out of here.


Me 42, W 39, S8, S6, S2
M 11y, A & ILYBNILWY 11/08
Walking away from a bad situation.

My Sitch

Strength and Compassion
No Resentment
Thinker #2075944 09/14/10 02:38 PM
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You know the WASs are famous for rewriting history in order to benefit them. That is just a fact of life, TH. Get all that paperwork she went you to your L so he/she can review it.

How did your date go?

soleil #2075987 09/14/10 03:48 PM
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Yea, I'm just venting.

Every time I am forced into a discussion or negotiation with her I come out having to shake my head to clear it of the FOG and remind myself what the facts really are.

---

I have been having fun on the dates, however. smile


Me 42, W 39, S8, S6, S2
M 11y, A & ILYBNILWY 11/08
Walking away from a bad situation.

My Sitch

Strength and Compassion
No Resentment
Thinker #2076240 09/14/10 08:52 PM
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Hi Thinker,

@Thinker>>"It's true to her pattern and her character, but she has completely rewritten our past to suit her own view of herself."

Leaving the mediator's office last week (practicing C for 35 yrs), I commented on all the distortions & rewriting of history in my H's declaration. His response;

"Yeah, we have a saying in this business, "If we believed everything written by both sides, all children would be in foster care."

Apparently they've heard it all & get pretty good at filling in a more accurate picture of events. (We hope so anyway!)

"Aaaahhhhrghhh!! Get me out of this fun house!"

I hear ya though!!

Take Care,

Sunny



Date of separation 4/23/07

DB under Warm&Sunny 4/07

married 9 yrs

sons 6yr & 17yr
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