I'm certainly not offering any legal advice, but doesn't it make you wonder if these guys only care about money? It's my understanding that you can only clain the mortgage interest deduction for a place you reside. So I'm not sure what he's asking for unless he is trying to get himself audited.
My Ex - now for 5 years, is STILL attempting to gain something from me to enrich himself. I claim one of our sons and he claims the other. He wants me to give up the other so he can claim both. What he REALLY wants is for me to give up my rights to his retirement, which I will not do. The tax consequences are huge. Head of household has a much lower tax burden than single. If I were you, I'd give him the oldest child (mine are twins so it does not matter).
Your suggestion sounds fair to me. He's pissy because he cares only about himself. Stay strong and keep what you can for yourself.
OMG, Ellie! This is what I get for being away for so damn long. How the heck are you? Drop me a line if you feel up to it.
Ya know, we did things the way Code Blue did... prepared returns both ways, looked at the bottom line and then did what was best "for the family". Uh, can I just say that the pissy attitude is to be expected? He's probably feeling sorry for himself, and of course, aren't you the cause of all his woes? It's just second nature to get pissy with you.
We also split deductions. Got it down to a fine science. But if I remember correctly, while we were still legally married, it was financially better to file jointly and split the difference.
Good luck and take care! Betsey
p.s. How's your medical career going these days? Hope you're kicking a$$... glad the VD massacre is now finally over for you.
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
Yeah, the long slow Valentine's day massacre is over - and I'm surprisingly happy about it! I wouldn't have believed you if you'd told me a year ago I could ever feel this way, but I do.
MY life is good. I realize, one important part is that without H, I'm free to hang out with MY kind of people. Many of them are types that my H would have looked down his nose at, but that I really love. I realize I had stupidly gone along with hanging with H's friends because of that.
I have tons of new friends, wish I had more time to hang with all of them. This weekend, for instance, I went with three of my buddies from my Adult Rock Band class, to a totally rockin' party/jam session with 100+ people, and got to sit in on the drums and play Bobby McGee
Isn't it crazy when the timing for something is insanely better and you find out stuff about yourself that you never knew? I'm so glad you got the good end of the lollipop and that life is fun and friends are plentiful. God is good, eh? Who'd have thunk?
Sounds like the music is the perfect antidote to everything! Will we be reading good reviews about you sometime soon? (I have a client who used to work with Ike Turner and other well known folks and who just got a CD out there and is contemplating leaving his full time job to go back into music...) Love these stories!
If you were referring to my now D13 (OMG!), she is doing well, but we're still tweaking things. She started her period last year, which forced us to start her on hormone therapy. (Still tweaking those meds, actually.) I just got off the phone with her GI, who wants to run some more CO2 tests for RTA. I guess a couple tests below normal got him a nephrologist consult. Oh well, she's have a great time in middle school and life is so good for her!
My D16 is now driving--thank goodness--and kicking a$$ in school. Volleyball is going great (her team qualified for nationals, which is in Reno this year), and she's busy working on her list of schools to recruit (yes, you read that right). I'm going to love having her go to college on a scholarship... Woo hoo! Party time for momma...
And for added fun, my 22 year old Aussie cousin (male) moved in with us. He's a hoot and seems to have antagonized my girls to the point where I think he's now an honorary sibling to them and son to me. Sure got me out of my comfort zone!
How are your kiddos doing? Especially with a change in family circumstances? Has your son graduated from college yet? Jeez, this time warp seems surreal. Our kids were so much younger when we started this mess, huh?
Take care - and lots of love and hugs.
Bets
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
Hey ellie, good to know someone around here besides me is happy to be free, and back with her own kind of people! I had the tax arguement with my mine, and well, he wouldnt agree to anything, so he went ahead and filed married the first year, mind you I didnt sign one peice of tax anything......spent the return on a down payment for a new harley....this year, he did it again, down payment on ow's suv.....my lawyer is gonna hit him so hard, least he wont be allowed to father anymore children lol!! hang in there! I think you are being perfectly reasonable!!! Traci
M 36 XH 34 3 children If a house is divided against itself, that house will not be able to stand. Mark 3:25 "your mood swings are giving me whiplash" twilight ALIVE FREE AND HAPPY 2010
Hey Bets - Kids are - okay. Thanks goodness they were older when this finally happened. The youngest was the most shook up - totally blindsided. But we're all getting through.
My oldest took a couple years off from college - anxiety problems, not caused by the divorce but not helped by it - he's going back in the fall. Daughter is in her first year of college, all A's, kicking butt - thank god! I wasn't quite sure how she'd do.
Youngest is in community college and bored stiff. He's doing a lot with his music though.
I'm dating a guy, long distance, kinda silly really since I KNOW he won't work out (he's been single for 20 years) but I think he's just the greatest and as long as I can go visit him once in a while, I'm happy for now.
Babygirl - your ex is gonna get hit hard for that, I bet. My ex is being quite reasonable, really. And he's okay with filing separately, since then he can deduct all the support he paid me. So it works out.
