You ask me if I love you And I choke on my reply I'd rather hurt you honestly Than mislead you with a lie And who am I to judge you On what you say or do? I'm only just beginning to see the real you
And sometimes when we touch The honesty's too much And I have to close my eyes and hide I wanna hold you til I die Til we both break down and cry I wanna hold you till the fear in me subsides
Romance and all its strategy Leaves me battling with my pride But through the insecurity Some tenderness survives I'm just another writer Still trapped within my truth A hesitant prize fighter Still trapped within my youth
And sometimes when we touch The honesty's too much And I have to close my eyes and hide I wanna hold you til I die Til we both break down and cry I wanna hold you till the fear in me subsides
At times I'd like to break you And drive you to your knees At times I'd like to break through And hold you endlessly
At times I understand you And I know how hard you've tried I've watched while love commands you And I've watched love pass you by
At times I think we're drifters Still searching for a friend A brother or a sister But then the passion flares again
And sometimes when we touch The honesty's too much And I have to close my eyes and hide I wanna hold you til I die Til we both break down and cry I wanna hold you till the fear in me subsides
Well I guess it’s time to start a new thread. Allot if little positives keep popping up. We had an X Mas Party to go to (W’s Friends) but son came down with W’s cold. I told her I would stay home with him but W said she did not want to go by herself. So we called my Mom and let her know son was sick and would be home by himself (First time, our baby is growing up) and he will be calling her if he needs anything. At the party I was NOT Clingy I went around talking to people and wife came up to me and asked to take my Jacket to put away. (Another first) then she brought me back a beer. W also put her rings on for the party another first in a long time She has been cheery in the morning and says good morning to me. And has just been all-around nice to me. It is so hard not to pursue, to let things go slowly. I used to hate the night because it was lonely and my mind would wander. I could not wait until morning. Now I have been sleeping pretty well. No intimacy but my W has done a total 180 in other areas. She no longer criticizes me. And I swear there was a time back then that if I said it was white she would say it was black just to make me wrong. A while back it was like I was just a piece of furnisher in the house. Now when she makes something she asks if I want some. If I asked her to make something she will. I think it is about time to push just a little and see what happens. NOT right now but real soon. It’s kind of like when I build something I know what I need but I always get a little extra just incase. Well I think I have all the foundation I need but I want to get in a little extra. Things are going to be changing after the first of the year. I need to start looking for a job. I am waiting until then because right now there are just temp jobs so if I took one of them I would lose my unemployment. Isn’t that the government for ya? instead if making it easier for me to find work they make it so if I did get something and it ended soon I would be worst off then I am now staying unemployed…. SO I got wife a back massager chair cushion with heat for Xmas. She is always complaining about her back hurting and she sits in her chair with a heating pad. I hope this is not a stupid present. I mean it is useful but NOT a toy. Remember I did buy her that GPS system not even a month ago. After I bought the chair cushion andhad it wrapped under the tree..I heard her talking to D. D got a new Ipod and wife was asking her if she could have her old one. Unfortunately D already gave it away. If I would have known that I would have gotten W an Ipod instead of the cushion. But all is not lost. I did find a MP3 player that I could afford made by crag. I also got wife a new battery for her car so I am pretty much wiped out of cash now. Oh by the way there was only one of these MP3 players left and guess what … It was PINK... W favorite color so I guess it was meant to be… If I don’t find a job after the first of the year I may try dancing at bacheloret (sp) For women) parties in my Man Panties…. (Remember that YoYo?) I hear those guys get great Tips…… Mabe you could join me Cl.. Show me some moves
Later Doc
And if I claim to be a wise man, well It surely means that I don't know
Two years ago I swore I would NOT be here two years from then and EVERYONE back then always said when I asked how long will it take.."It Takes as Long as it takes"
Bless you all and I hope you get what you really want for Christmas..All I want is a "I love you" from wife..all the money in the world would not make me happier..
JoJo You have mail
Doc
And if I claim to be a wise man, well It surely means that I don't know
I haven't read your other threads but it sounds like the fog may be clearing with your W. Those are some positive signs. Hopefully the progress will continue into the new year and beyond.
Me47 H46 S13 M16 Piecing since May/09
"Life is 10% what happens to us and 90% how we react to it." Lou Holtz
