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Joined: Sep 2009
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He insists that they are just friends. However I do have my doubts.

As far as her husband goes we are both friends with him. Her H thinks the friendship is just friendship.


t=5.5yrs m=4
kids=4 (8,9,10,&11)
I dropped the bomb 10-09
regaining myself
in house seperation 9-6-09
divorce final 4-19-10
Moved out 9-17-09
Joined: Sep 2009
Posts: 31
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Joined: Sep 2009
Posts: 31
I did get the DR book and have found it very helpful. I am starting to put some of my new found tools to work. This morning was good we had a laugh and shared a hug or 2. Yesturday was good too. For the first time it 2 weeks we talked on the phone, and he was actually having a conversation with me via text. I know that these things would not seem like a huge deal to someone not in my shoes, but to me these small steps are good. We are going to have friends over tonight that we have not seen in a long time. This should be a good thing. Give him a taste of when things were happier. Sometimes that assocation of a couple who was around during the good is a good thing. Not only that it is someone else who can look from the outside and see what is going on. Then it is not just me trying to figure things out it is someone who maybe able to say we are heading in the right direction or not.

I wish all of you luck today.... stay strong.


t=5.5yrs m=4
kids=4 (8,9,10,&11)
I dropped the bomb 10-09
regaining myself
in house seperation 9-6-09
divorce final 4-19-10
Moved out 9-17-09
Joined: Sep 2009
Posts: 31
S
Member
OP Offline
Member
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Joined: Sep 2009
Posts: 31
We are seperated and living under different roofs as of Thursday. I think this is best. I feel the stress leaving me and I have the feeling of relief. at this point I am getting me and my life back together.


t=5.5yrs m=4
kids=4 (8,9,10,&11)
I dropped the bomb 10-09
regaining myself
in house seperation 9-6-09
divorce final 4-19-10
Moved out 9-17-09
Joined: Sep 2009
Posts: 31
S
Member
OP Offline
Member
S
Joined: Sep 2009
Posts: 31
It has been a while since I have done an update. So here is the most receint. He is living at his sisters with his son and I am at the house with my 3 kids. We did talk over the weekend and he said that he is not ready to divorced yet and so we are working on things between us sort of starting at ground zero. But guess what guys!!!! I FOUND THE CHEESE!!!!!! And what yummy cheese it is. We had a good weekend and so far it is going good.


t=5.5yrs m=4
kids=4 (8,9,10,&11)
I dropped the bomb 10-09
regaining myself
in house seperation 9-6-09
divorce final 4-19-10
Moved out 9-17-09
Joined: Sep 2009
Posts: 31
S
Member
OP Offline
Member
S
Joined: Sep 2009
Posts: 31
I have been rather absent lately.
i have been doing some inner looking and trying to change myself and my life. Husband and I have been doing ok this week on the whole getting along thing for about a week and then today he walked in the house and started nagging about the outside of the house. I was instantly annoied because I feel with him moving out he has lost the right to have a fit about the house. He said if I did not like it change it. At which point I told him he needed to leave. He is very angry at me right now. And I think we need to have a serious talk. Actually no we dont. Maybe I should just ride this out and see what happens. Help.... I dont know what to do.


t=5.5yrs m=4
kids=4 (8,9,10,&11)
I dropped the bomb 10-09
regaining myself
in house seperation 9-6-09
divorce final 4-19-10
Moved out 9-17-09
Joined: Sep 2009
Posts: 31
S
Member
OP Offline
Member
S
Joined: Sep 2009
Posts: 31
I have still been reading the DR book. Now for me to milk out a good book for this long is not like me. But I am not just reading it to read it I am reading and trying to digest it at the same time. I am finding a lot of useful things in the book. However my story has yet to be completed and I don't know exactly how it is going to end. I try to be happy when H comes over or when ever we talk or for that fact text, but sometimes he just wants to fight. Even if he won't admit that this is what he is trying to do.

Today I was happy and upbeat and I believe really pulled off the little ray of sunshine. We had a good visit. and that is where I have let it lie. I would rather give him the leave on a good and see what tomorrow brings then take the chance of fighting tonight over the phone.

I am trying to put the OW off to the far reaches of my mind and do a 180. I am being the happy go lucky you arent gonna rain on my parade girl. This I believe is part of what H fell in love with in the first place. In the winter of my life on the darkest night of the year I am being my own personal sunshine. I know in my heart of hearts this OW will fade into the dark and the EMA will die on its own, After all you can't start something without trust and both of them are WAS.

The other part of what I believe H was attracked to is my strength. My strength comes from my sunshine. And this stregnth radiates outward for the world to see. So I am parting the clouds and letting this shine through. I am GAL, my own BACK!


t=5.5yrs m=4
kids=4 (8,9,10,&11)
I dropped the bomb 10-09
regaining myself
in house seperation 9-6-09
divorce final 4-19-10
Moved out 9-17-09
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