If your WAS would agree to read one book in support of saving marriage what one would you suggest? I am reluctant to suggest Divorce Remedy only because Michelle says it is not a good idea.
My H has asked me to read two books. The first one Too Good to Leave, Too Bad to Stay. This book was written for the person who is unhappy and looking for someone to support them in NOT looking at themselves but blaming their partner for everything. If you want to save your marriage look elsewhere. If you are set on ending your marriage, then no need to read this unless you are looking for someone to tell you it's 'ok'.
The latest book is called Rebuilding. I have not seen it yet but understand that it is about rebuilding your life after a divorce.
My H has agreed to read something I suggest since I have been so open to reading what he has suggested.
So this is my one shot, should I just tell him thanks but no thanks (since it probably won't really matter) or should I really suggest a book and if so, what one?
Me 54 DS19 and DS17 Married 06/1989 Divorced 01/2011
If he was/is in an EA, or is lying/denying about having an affair, I'd recommend "NOT Just Friends," by Glass.
If the affair is out in the open and he's just not willing to end it and work on the marriage, and we had kids, I'd probably pick one of the good books about the potential damage that divorces can cause to families (sorry, I can't think of a title at the moment).
There is a book by John Gottman called 10 Lessons to Transform Your Marriage. It discusses situations that other couples have gone through (some dire) and tells how they get past it. It is written for people who are committed to the marriage so it is probably not applicable. I haven't read the other books suggested, but it is a little inspirational.
Together since Feb. 2003 Maried since July 2007 Bomb occured early Dec. 2008 She's approved for a lease mid Feb. 2009 (deciding on if to take it or not)
Well, there's always the classic Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus. It's written with a sense of humor so it helps to lighten things up a bit. Very enlightening too.
Me 56 H 47 Married 21 years No children Bomb & moved out 4/07 "My feelings have changed" & "I want to live by myself". Ow Bomb 8/07 H filed 6/08 D final 2/05/10
Hi Mat, yes H and I saw Fireproof back in the summer. It had no impact on him at all that ia could tell. Or who knows mybe that is what prompted him to have an affair. (just kidding!)
The more I think about it, the more I think I will probably not suggest a book for him to read, it really would be futule.
Me 54 DS19 and DS17 Married 06/1989 Divorced 01/2011
