So I just had a fabulous moment with my H and so I needed to share with someone and thought who best would celebrate with me than my divorce busting pals. If interested in my sitch, look under infidelity. H and I are separated and he is currently with OW but we're still in contact.
So, I've been going dark on my H waiting for him to miss and contact me, a real 180 for me who is the relationship fixer. I thought it would take longer but guess what he just called me - day 4 of going dark. The funny thing is that in trying to thought stop negative thoughts, I was just sitting here at work and made a list of all his positive attributes, which I recommend every hurting spouse to do. I made sure I included real examples of him displaying his positive attributes. Be carful though because you will get tempted to pursue your spouse after you do the list. So, the list had great sex as one attribute and I then listed all the crazy places we have done it over the years... some very crazy places. I was here dying to call him or text him the list and whala, the phone rings and its HIM. We talked for a bit, nice short and sweet conversation since I was already in good spirits and then I gave him the list asking him what all of these places have in common (I know I shouldn't bring up good things about the marriage but it was hilarious as hell). We both laughed it off until I started to cry from laughing. He even said I guess that's a sign thinking at first that it was a list I saw on the internet. Then whala again, my cell phone rings in the midst of laughing. So, I said... I'll call you back. And guess what, I won't. Leave him wanting MORE. I'm so proud of ME.
Anyway, so I thought it would be great to have a thread that celebrates small accomplishments as we DB. Please join in and let's celebrate!!!!!
Vickyd, You go girl! What a great plan... to list all of your husband's attributes. And it's also great that you reminded yourself that you might feel tempted to call after such positive thoughts. You are absolutely right about that. It is so wonderful that he called instead. And although you know you were taking a little bit of a chance by enthusiastically sharing your sex list, it turned out more than ok. Just watch your enthusiasm. Go slowly. You are doing great. Keep up the great work. I also like the idea that you are celebrating your not-so-baby-steps.
