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#1328695 01/16/08 06:36 PM
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I learned quite some time ago that my H's A with OW was not his first. A few months before his A with OW started, he had one-nighters or a brief A, which was/were most likely paid for. As far as I know, he had never done this for the 10 years we were together pre-MLC.

I've blocked this out of my mind for many months, thinking it meant nothing because he paid for it and also because it was during the time he was in replay. Lately, I've been wondering:

Are multiple A's a common symptom of MLC? Or am I failing to recognize/ keeping myself in denial of a much larger problem?

Is anyone else dealing with a spouse with multiple A's?

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SH - My H also had multiple affairs.

His first was a one night stand that occured approximately 2 years before my first bomb.

Second lasted a few weeks and was with a co worker - actually a subordinate at work. He thought he was "in love" with this one.

Third was a long term A with the best friend of the second affair.

It seemed to me that he was looking for "something" and OW#3 was the one that fit that bill best.

I think some have multiple A's, some just one. I don't that it really matters in MLC since all cases are different.

BFM


There is only one person who could ever make you happy, and that person is you.
David Burns, Intimate Connections
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Thanks for sharing BFM.

Originally Posted By: butterflymom
I don't that it really matters in MLC since all cases are different.


That's what I have thought about it all this time too, which is why I've been able to disregard it. Glad to hear someone who has been through it agree with me.

Outside of MLC-land, the thought of multiple As, let alone a single A, is just disgusting...


Moderated by  Cadet, DnJ, job, Michele Weiner-Davis 

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