I have been seeing mom every day. She is worse again. She had two good days but today she was suffering. She ate some soups the last few days but she is back to not eating. They have her on IV food but I do not know how much longer that will keep her going. They did some testing last night and that drained her and her attitude is down as well. The doctor told her that she is cancer free and not to worry the abdominal mass right now. Her mouth sores from the antibiotics are still not improving, according to her. However, her mouth looks 1000% better.
I am coming down with something myself; stomach virus I think. I am physically exhausted and drained. I was hoping my mom was improving but it is just ups and downs and it is coming up on three weeks.
W stayed away this week but she said she was sick. She did call me several times and told me to 'send her love' to mom. Mom is still very upset that W is not visiting.
So, the drama continues.
We did get two inches of snow here. It was so pretty. It was gone by the end of the day as temperatures went above freezing. Snow flurries today and it is due to get real cold soon.
(((Jeff))) First rule, you always have to take of yourself first. Make sure you're doing that. Second rule, follow the first rule.
Still praying for the best for you and your family.
Snow and cold? I can beat any hand of cold you can hold, and raise your snow by 5. You may be in the deep south, but I am in the deep freeze. bbbbrrrrrrrrr
Live your life while you are still living. Riding the trail less traveled.
Jeff...don't forget about asking about carafate (sucralfate) for her mouth.
Do take care of YOURSELF.
You have time....TPN (total parenteral nutrition) can keep her supported for more than a week. I've supported some patients on it for several weeks if not a month or so. Although it won't make her gain weight, it will slow down/halt the breakdown of protein/muscle mass. Try and keep her spirits up as best you can. Tell her about your doctor friend 'up north and not THAT far from Hoboken' and tell her that I am pulling for her.
Hold the line.
FIB
Me 55; XW 47; 2 kids (S13, D11) Bomb 05/19/06 Original thread http://tinyurl.com/yg2ou2t Last anniversary 04/25/10, Divorced 5/12/10 Status: Loving father of 2 beautiful children;
Will continue to pray for her. As for W, don't focus on whether she visis or not. If she says she's been sick, then just accept what she says. She has been contacting you to check up on your Mom so I'm sure she cares.
It does sound like you are exhausted with all that has been going on. Most importantly take care of yourself.
We are all here supporting you and your family.
Me: 49 - S22 & S26 H: 41 - No kids M: 10/00 Bomb New Year's Day 2006 H living w OW 01/07; have baby 12/07 D final 07/07 Thread #9 - Hope Lives On
Well it has been three weeks in the hospital. I really admire the folks who work in hospitals b/c it is a stressful place. My mom is doing better. All her tests have come back negative. Her pneumonia is getting better and the abdominal mass turned out to be a fibrous tumor, not cancer. She may have to have it removed at some later date but for now it is not threatening. Her mouth has improved, but she is still eating very little and she is tired and weak. They cannot move her to rehab until she is off the IV feeding and the doc feels she must move to rehab soon; she will not get better in the hospital.
Trying to get mom to eat is like trying to get my W to reconsider; you can put the choice in front of them but you cannot force them to do anything; even if it is best for them. So it is wait and see. Mom really is in God's hands now.
Thanks all for the prayers; for someone given a 15% chance three weeks ago, my mom is doing very well. She is still suffering though and that is hard to take. But it appears as though she has turned a corner.
Me? Not doing well at all. Watching love ones suffer is no fun. First my M and my kids and now my mom. It sucks.
Hey, you, I hurt for you, and really worry that you are running yourself down, and will ultimately collapse under the strain. Please try to take care of yourself, do something for yourself, take a break from it occasionally. You know your mother, more than anyone, would not want you to get sick and down, especially because of her.
May make it up to the mid fifties with sun later in the week--get some fresh air.
These are the moments that really test our spirit...our resolve..our courage....and our integrity...and our love.
Seems like you passed with an A+.
Hold the line my friend. I admire you as a father...a son...and a man and husband.
FIB
Me 55; XW 47; 2 kids (S13, D11) Bomb 05/19/06 Original thread http://tinyurl.com/yg2ou2t Last anniversary 04/25/10, Divorced 5/12/10 Status: Loving father of 2 beautiful children;
Jeff - As a "minor leaguer" in the game of life I have never been very good at hitting the curve balls that have been thrown at me. As I read about your situation I am totally impressed with how you have been handling the surreal curves that have been tossed your way. Pardon the dumb baseball analogies, but you are a "major league" class act that may slump occasionally, but always comes up with a way to break out of it. If you don't believe me just listen to your kids and realize how much they hold you in high regard. I am not trying to downplay the seriousness of your predicament. The problem with your Mom could not have come at a worse time. But I am relieved to know that your wife still cares greatly about her as well. I hope your Mom responds positively to treatment and gets better. If that is not the Lord's plan know that you have been blessed with an awesome parent who has been instrumental in raising a great son and father. As they say in church, "may the peace of the Lord be with you." We are all with you, thinking about you, and praying for you and your family.
Thanks all: nicola, ISLH, Jet, FIB, Jenny and Sheila. BA - I like the baseball icon - I need to figure out how to add one. And thanks for posting - getting your 'final' decree must have sucked. TJ, thanks.
I am tired of this thread so I will close with good news. Your prayers really helped. If only they would work to restore my M. Or maybe they are working - leading me in a different direction?
Mom is doing better. They decided to move her to rehab today. Unknown for how long.
Good past few days: the doc tried some new mouth treatment and it cleared up the sores. Mom then starting eating some, so they took her off the IV food to increase her appetite. She is eating better now, but still not enough. She is still giving the folks a hard time about all the pills she has to take. The doc is concerned because she will need meds for a very long time yet and she has to take them. Mom feels better but is still weak.
Other updates: The pneumonia is still improving. All other tests came back negative. The growth in her abdominal area is a tumor but not cancer. It is okay for now but may require removal later if it gets any larger because it may then cause her pain. However there is a surgery risk.
The doctors told me that they are concerned about her living alone any longer; she will need assistance with medicines and eating. The doctors suggest a nursing home. I have yet to figure out what she will do.
I have been sick past few days; missed work. The stress is too much for me right now and the weather is cold.
Thanks again. This is a special place with special people.
