No longer "I just want to be friends" but rather.. - 09/12/12 02:43 PM
Hi everyone,
I'm here in piecing now, after 7-8 months of being over in Divorce Busting, and with wonderful support from the fellow posters and Michele's great Divorce Busting book, I made it to the 'other side'.
My old post is here if you want some backstory: http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubb...403#Post2275403
Otherwise, things are going well. My H and I have been dating, and we both make a great effort during the dates. We see each other once or twice a week. It's usually him asking me over to his place, or to go out. If something comes up that I'd really like to do, I then suggest it. We've kept it light, easy and breezy - yet interesting.
I've come to really enjoy my own space (I have my own apartment now), and don't see me giving it up anytime soon. I've also been focussing on my career a lot - which I never did in the past so much, even though I always had a career. It's very good being a bit self-focussed, or rather - focussed on the things that give me enjoyment such as friends, and my own activities.
My sister recently broke up with her boyfriend of a year, and I gave her all the MWD advice that has helped me. I also suggested the book to her. It is HARD WORK, because it breaks down so many ingrained habits, and there is no certainty in the process. That is the toughest part. Had nothing worked out though, it would be the GALing which would have kept me going.
As it stands, I believe that being independent and continuing to GAL is helping a lot in my new R with my H. It provides a lot of balance.
So far so good. I continue on my 180's and feel natural about it too - which also really helps. So, the work continues. I'll keep everyone posted.
I'm here in piecing now, after 7-8 months of being over in Divorce Busting, and with wonderful support from the fellow posters and Michele's great Divorce Busting book, I made it to the 'other side'.
My old post is here if you want some backstory: http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubb...403#Post2275403
Otherwise, things are going well. My H and I have been dating, and we both make a great effort during the dates. We see each other once or twice a week. It's usually him asking me over to his place, or to go out. If something comes up that I'd really like to do, I then suggest it. We've kept it light, easy and breezy - yet interesting.
I've come to really enjoy my own space (I have my own apartment now), and don't see me giving it up anytime soon. I've also been focussing on my career a lot - which I never did in the past so much, even though I always had a career. It's very good being a bit self-focussed, or rather - focussed on the things that give me enjoyment such as friends, and my own activities.
My sister recently broke up with her boyfriend of a year, and I gave her all the MWD advice that has helped me. I also suggested the book to her. It is HARD WORK, because it breaks down so many ingrained habits, and there is no certainty in the process. That is the toughest part. Had nothing worked out though, it would be the GALing which would have kept me going.
As it stands, I believe that being independent and continuing to GAL is helping a lot in my new R with my H. It provides a lot of balance.
So far so good. I continue on my 180's and feel natural about it too - which also really helps. So, the work continues. I'll keep everyone posted.