Ebenezer-The Life Coach: Life Lessons from Scrooge - 01/02/10 08:53 PM
As the holidays come and go, one of the most popular remakes we see on network television is the holiday classic called A Christmas Carol. Kelsey Grammar sings about days' past in the musical, Vanessa Williams reconnects with her long lost friends while Susan Lucci discovers what a Grinch she really is as modern day Scrooge.
As I see it, we can learn a lot from this grouchy, ghost-fearing guy. Exactly what life lessons can we learn from Ebenezer, anyway?
Those apparitions got it right in my book. After all, I never realized how on target they were! As I humbly admit to being an addict of "Fa La La Lifetime" and know many of these shows verbatim, I never realized how Scrooge's life lessons gave me the foundation to my coaching business (and I thought I was an original!)
Transition Tip # 1 - Remember your pastJust like how Ebenezer needs to go down memory lane to remember more carefree days, I have my clients do the same. Unfortunately, we all have he potential to become Scrooge-like. Ironically, Ebenezer was not always a "Scrooge". Since many of my clients have experienced transitions, like Ebenezer, that may have given them a more pessimistic view of life, I have them gently revisit times past where they were more carefree and simply put - happier. By doing this, they can reconnect with the things/people/places that were enjoyable to restore that twinkle in their eye.
Transition Tip # 2 - Accept your present. One of the most important life lessons that Scrooge experienced was his current reality - how he treated the people that worked for him, the chain of events that took place by having Tiny Tim's father work on Christmas and so on. Just like Scrooge, by looking at your current situation and seeing it for what it is, you are most likely to be able to accept it as a means of moving forward. If you are in a constant push and pull with yourself by perpetuating the "blame game," you will be stuck in that reality.
By taking responsibility for the situation you are in (and are unhappy with) , you will most likely take alternate steps on how get to a better place in the future. For example, if you wake up today and finally admit that you can't stand your new haircut, I would imagine that the smart thing to do would be to find a new hair stylist in the future. The same premise goes for your personal and professional life. Simply put, if it isn't working for you then fix it.
Take note of your current reality - what is working for you and what do you need to change? Have you always wanted to go back to school for your MBA? Are you sick of looking at the same pile of CD's sitting in the corner of your family room (I use this example from personal experience!) or are you missing your date night with your husband? These are all doable tasks that you can fix. But, you will not take the steps to fix them if you do not acknowledge them! By accepting your present does not mean you cannot change it. By accepting your present, as Dr. Phil says, you are "getting real with yourself."
Transition Tip # 3 - Dream about a better tomorrow. I really don't think Scrooge would have changed unless he took a look into his future. He was able to see the results of his behavior and it really hit home. Just like Scrooge, we need to think about how we are living our lives TODAY that will result in a better tomorrow. If you keep doing more of the same, you will get more of the same results. Sometimes, we are so reactive to our lives that we neglect to plan them. We simply react to the people and situations around us rather than having a game plan. You need to think about the daily goals you want to achieve - actually envision the results - in order to obtain them.
As for me, I am not afraid to dream big. It isn’t unusual for me to sheepishly discuss my dreams to the occasional nay-sayer. However, I refuse to let their Scrooge-like beliefs get in the way of my future. To practice what I preach, I have a vision board in my bedroom that has a whole array of hopes and dreams that if anything, make me happy when I look at them first thing in the morning. I have pictures of my friends and family – those that I am grateful to have in my life. Also, on a more playful note, I have photos of castles in Scotland that I hope to visit one day. As I see it, these pictures give me a road map for my action plan to one night go stay in a beautiful castle (minus the ghosts, thank you very much!)
Take the time today to make a list of the things in your life that are working for you - those everyday tasks/situations/people/ encounters that are going right. Use this as a gratitude list to create a positive mindset for you to take this plan a step further. For instance, if you were excited that you finally ran those 2 miles this morning, why not plan to run a 5K in the spring?
Scrooge was really no different than the rest of us. He was a nice guy who took a wrong turn. His heart was in the right place he just needed a few ghosts to get him back on track.
Don't wait for an apparition to show you the way. You have the tools to do it right now.
Think about what things/people/places that used to bring you joy in the past and what is positively working for you in the present. And, think about the "wonderful life" (no pun intended) you want for yourself in the future. Once you do, ghosts or no ghosts, I guarantee you will sleep like a baby tonight.
From from my blog - Thanks for reading!
As I see it, we can learn a lot from this grouchy, ghost-fearing guy. Exactly what life lessons can we learn from Ebenezer, anyway?
Those apparitions got it right in my book. After all, I never realized how on target they were! As I humbly admit to being an addict of "Fa La La Lifetime" and know many of these shows verbatim, I never realized how Scrooge's life lessons gave me the foundation to my coaching business (and I thought I was an original!)
Transition Tip # 1 - Remember your pastJust like how Ebenezer needs to go down memory lane to remember more carefree days, I have my clients do the same. Unfortunately, we all have he potential to become Scrooge-like. Ironically, Ebenezer was not always a "Scrooge". Since many of my clients have experienced transitions, like Ebenezer, that may have given them a more pessimistic view of life, I have them gently revisit times past where they were more carefree and simply put - happier. By doing this, they can reconnect with the things/people/places that were enjoyable to restore that twinkle in their eye.
Transition Tip # 2 - Accept your present. One of the most important life lessons that Scrooge experienced was his current reality - how he treated the people that worked for him, the chain of events that took place by having Tiny Tim's father work on Christmas and so on. Just like Scrooge, by looking at your current situation and seeing it for what it is, you are most likely to be able to accept it as a means of moving forward. If you are in a constant push and pull with yourself by perpetuating the "blame game," you will be stuck in that reality.
By taking responsibility for the situation you are in (and are unhappy with) , you will most likely take alternate steps on how get to a better place in the future. For example, if you wake up today and finally admit that you can't stand your new haircut, I would imagine that the smart thing to do would be to find a new hair stylist in the future. The same premise goes for your personal and professional life. Simply put, if it isn't working for you then fix it.
Take note of your current reality - what is working for you and what do you need to change? Have you always wanted to go back to school for your MBA? Are you sick of looking at the same pile of CD's sitting in the corner of your family room (I use this example from personal experience!) or are you missing your date night with your husband? These are all doable tasks that you can fix. But, you will not take the steps to fix them if you do not acknowledge them! By accepting your present does not mean you cannot change it. By accepting your present, as Dr. Phil says, you are "getting real with yourself."
Transition Tip # 3 - Dream about a better tomorrow. I really don't think Scrooge would have changed unless he took a look into his future. He was able to see the results of his behavior and it really hit home. Just like Scrooge, we need to think about how we are living our lives TODAY that will result in a better tomorrow. If you keep doing more of the same, you will get more of the same results. Sometimes, we are so reactive to our lives that we neglect to plan them. We simply react to the people and situations around us rather than having a game plan. You need to think about the daily goals you want to achieve - actually envision the results - in order to obtain them.
As for me, I am not afraid to dream big. It isn’t unusual for me to sheepishly discuss my dreams to the occasional nay-sayer. However, I refuse to let their Scrooge-like beliefs get in the way of my future. To practice what I preach, I have a vision board in my bedroom that has a whole array of hopes and dreams that if anything, make me happy when I look at them first thing in the morning. I have pictures of my friends and family – those that I am grateful to have in my life. Also, on a more playful note, I have photos of castles in Scotland that I hope to visit one day. As I see it, these pictures give me a road map for my action plan to one night go stay in a beautiful castle (minus the ghosts, thank you very much!)
Take the time today to make a list of the things in your life that are working for you - those everyday tasks/situations/people/ encounters that are going right. Use this as a gratitude list to create a positive mindset for you to take this plan a step further. For instance, if you were excited that you finally ran those 2 miles this morning, why not plan to run a 5K in the spring?
Scrooge was really no different than the rest of us. He was a nice guy who took a wrong turn. His heart was in the right place he just needed a few ghosts to get him back on track.
Don't wait for an apparition to show you the way. You have the tools to do it right now.
Think about what things/people/places that used to bring you joy in the past and what is positively working for you in the present. And, think about the "wonderful life" (no pun intended) you want for yourself in the future. Once you do, ghosts or no ghosts, I guarantee you will sleep like a baby tonight.
From from my blog - Thanks for reading!